New ish boyfriend - masonic lodge - weird?

[Creambun2]

Have been seeing a guy for just over three months now, all going well, seems a "normal" person (important for me after some awful relationships). However, this guy is part of masonic lodge and is asking me to come to some "ladies" night - sounds like some do from the 1930s or something.

AIBU to think this is a bit weird? He is in his early 30s. The only knowledge of the masonic world I have is that they used to deliver my grandmother a Christmas hamper every year after my grandfather died.

Why would a young bloke want to mess around in aprons doing "rituals" with loads of probably older men?! Is he going to suggest sex with aprons and gloves next

Anyone got any experience of this or been to one of these ladies nights ever?

BIL Is a Shriner (a Mason branch) very involved many hours of commitment and fund raising for sick children. An honest lovely fellow.
Networking works many ways, should OP go out with her Mason man she might meet other fellows who suit her personality better.

@ParkheadParadise I only wish I had more secrets to share, DH is a useless information gatherer

Apparently they had Scotch broth with pearl barley in it at the Christmas dinner too and DH's boss was sure it was out of a tin.

I went out with someone who was in a similar society (Royal Antediluvian Order of Buffaloes aka The Buffs).
My dad was a Buff! He reckoned it was a load of old nonsense but they did throw a lovely children's Christmas party.
I wouldn't be keen to be involved with a Mason, but I'm Catholic and it's strictly forbidden, so it would just be too much conflict.

All those saying 'I knew a mason/met members of one particular lodge and they were fuckers, avoid him like the plague' - it's a worldwide organisation of thousands. Are you really going to assume every single one is just like the one/few you met?

As I said above, there are bastards in ANY large organisation. Doesn't mean they all are.

There are tons of these organizations, those not keen on a Mason type would a gent from the Knights of Columbus or Ladies of the Royal Purple or any other service organization be a no go as well?

Grandad was a mason. Spent huge amounts of family money propping up the local lodge. My grandmother was ok with it as apparently they look after the widows in the later years.

They didn't.

Have always been suspicious of a club which does not allow the opposite sex to join.

If you are an elected official (e.g. Local councillor) you have to declare it on the register of interests. So you don't favour one business/person/contract over another because that it part of the masons - passing business interests on.

I wouldn't want anything to do with a organisation which actively excludes women and had 'ladies' nights.

I've met a good few, they haven't been racist (at least not to my non white face), and don't have particularly high powered jobs (kitchen fitters, bus drivers and whatnot) so no evidence of nepotistic climbing over the backs of others. They seem to see it as a laugh, doing silly shit in weird costumes. Like a WI but more eccentric. I guess different branches have different outlooks and atmospheres, like any club, church or whatever, some do sound more sinister.

My boyfriend is one. Hasn't revealed himself to be a sexist, racist, sectarian knob yet. So personally I wouldn't recommend ruling someone out purely for being a Freemason. Ladies night sounds horrendous though, I've managed to avoid that.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_general_fraternities#International
Here's a list

Who wants to join a club where new members place a sack on their head whilst the other members hit them with a stick

maude so how do you feel about the Women's Institute then?

*I have Masons in my family and am laughing heartily at those saying that the Masons are just a big-hearted bunch of charity doers. Bollocks. If you want to do charity, get yourself down the local charity shop, or set up a direct debit., or just quietly help a neighbour in need. Ah, but no - that kind of selfless giving wont give you the kind of promotion, or good deal, that can be obtained by a shonky handshake. I have no issue with people having private clubs where members help each other out but to pretend that club is anything but a self selecting, self serving entity is disingenious.

And you might have seen a black mason, or a female mason, or a gay mason but I assure you that they are in the minority and are there for appearance sake. And I know that for a FACT.

Oh, and in Scotland - the Orange Lodge and the Masons are one and the same and are the most bigoted bunch of misogynistic bastards out there.*

This, with bells on.

Where are you, OP?

Freemasonry & the Orange Order are not the same.

I suspect, like most organizations, what people are like and what they do all depends on the lodge. I´d definitely go. Even if you hate it, it´ll be an experience you can talk about for years - it´s not every day you get invited to a masonic lodge.

Free masonry and the Orange Order are not the same thing, btw.

Councillors, civic officials and police officers are all supposed to declare being masons. In my (extensive) experience, they don't.

I've seen important decisions which should have been made in the local council chamber being pushed through by groups of masons who had clearly already made their decision at the lodge the night before.

I've seen police officers and council officials in Masonic cahoots making funding decisions that should never have been made.

I've seen expensive public contracts mysteriously awarded to firms run by fellow masons.

There may we'll be a token handful of women, gay people, black people and poor people involved but the majority of members are still middle class white, well-off men. It's elitist.

Women are relegated to subservient'roles, to supporting the men and to taking part in 'ladies' nights' FFS

It all sounds a bit tin-hatty of me, I know, but I've seen all this going on before my eyes.

OP - are u coming back or have u already been sacrificed ??

The Orange Order are most definitely not involved in charitable deeds.

Janice is this cross party or one party?

The bigotry and stupidity in here is unreal- the orange lodge is nothing to do with freemasons, neither has the travelodge

We loved ladies night, was a chance to dress up and dance.

My late FIL went through the chair etc, and we still do the printing for the local lodges.

They're networking and charity clubs really. Nothing more.

When my beloved FIL died they made sure we were ok, and formed a guard of honour at his funeral. It was very moving.

Are you sure about the travelodge?

Eye said fry

Your comment

Still, at least they let women into the place (on occasion): more than can be said for ethnic minorities.

I am completely shocked at your blatant RACISM