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Original poster

Was she being unreasonable? (First date thing)

236 replies

FallingOrbit · 06/09/2017 16:13

Afternoon peeps.

Went on a bit of a date last night with someone I met about a week ago. We met when I did a fairly large job for her (I'm a tree surgeon and she had a large leylandii she needed removing) - did the job, had a bit of a laugh with her on the day and her 4 year old daughter.

Anyway she had my mobile number and later that night she text me to say great job etc etc and we just ended up texting and the odd phone call for about a week after the job, eventually she got around to the "fancy a drink one night" kinda thing. I said sure why not.

So off we go on our "date"- we only went to a nice quiet pub I know for some food, I drove so she could have a drink (she only had 2 glasses of wine though) and we had a really nice time, lots of laughing and getting to know each other, seemed to be going well.

On the drive home (as in to take her home about 9pm) my GPS piped up with "Turn Left in 100 yards" because it thought I was going home and "home" appeared on the screen. She said "oh you live up there? Can I see your house?" I thought ok sure. So we head up my road, I point and say "that one there" - she said "So aren't you going to invite me in for coffee?" (yes, she did say exactly that)

So, sure thing. Into the house we go (and NO I wasn't taking coffee to mean anything other than coffee but it wouldn't matter anyway as you will soon see) - she FLIPPED HER LID. I had a chainsaw on the floor in the hallway and a very (very) large chainsaw on the floor in the kitchen. She wen't completely bonkers and started with "OMG what if my daughter was here she could cut her self"
"You shouldn't leave things like that lying around it's dangerous" and so on.

My response was "well your daughter isn't here, is she?! If she was they wouldn't be there"

She said "Take me home, I can't deal with this"

So I did. I made attempts to reason with her on the 20 min drive back to hers, no joy. She just got out and I haven't heard from her since.

I'm not bothered that I haven't heard from her, I just want to know what others make of this.

The only reason they were there is because I was running slightly late for our "date" because a job ran over a bit and instead of messing around unlocking the garage etc I just grabbed them from the trailer, dumped them where I dumped them and got straight in the shower so I could pick her up on time. It's not like I normally keep them there and I wasn't at all expecting us to end up at my place (for any reason)

Was she being unreasonable?

OP posts:
SteppingOnToes · 06/09/2017 16:47

Where abouts are you OP? My chainsaw could do with some company ;)

Dippysnowoman · 06/09/2017 16:48

Lucky escape for you.
We've all ran in the house and dumped stuff as we're running out again.

HotNatured · 06/09/2017 16:49

GirlsWhoWearGlasses

Why have so many people assumed the OP is a bloke?

Why assume we have assumed?

He's a regular poster

Original poster
FallingOrbit · 06/09/2017 16:50

being a tree surgeon is apparently women's top choice of career in a man they'd like to date

Is it?! Gawd I have no idea why. Where'd ya get that from?! It's all sweat and sawdust, I get through more vacuum cleaners than socks! Doesn't matter how careful you are, there will be sawdust in the house. Regular hoovering, very regular!

Some of the replies are hilarious so thanks peeps, I didn't even get to giving her the explanation tbh. I just figured if she's going to react like that without even asking about it then it's unlikely we'd get very far in a relationship anyway!

OP posts:
PoppyPopcorn · 06/09/2017 16:50

She sounds nuts. Fairly obvious why a tree surgeon would have chainsaws lying around. Had you been an accountant her reaction might have been more understandable.

Rollercoaster1920 · 06/09/2017 16:50

Sounds like things were going well and she was already positioning you as step parent in her head - then the chainsaws didn't fit with that mental image! Which is a bit sad in a way.

is this the full story though? Is your clean / tidy house painted black or something? Are the chainsaws being used as an excuse?

Fluffypinkpyjamas · 06/09/2017 16:53

You had a lucky escape OP , she's odd to say the least.

Original poster
FallingOrbit · 06/09/2017 16:55

An excuse for what?! And no it isn't painted black! I only redecorated a fortnight ago! Well, downstairs anyway, still in the middle of the upstairs.

My chainsaw could do with some company

Ha! SW Wales. I'll get them out of the lockup immediately!

OP posts:
FizzyGreenWater · 06/09/2017 16:56

Dodged a bullet!!

However I am still sniggering at your scene-setting OP:

'I'm a tree surgeon and she had a large leylandii she needed removing '

Grin fnarr fnarr

KC225 · 06/09/2017 16:59

I think she went with the flow, all going well, pushing for you to invite her in etc. Then she bottled it, remembered she cannot be going home and 'supping a bloke's cuppa' because she has a daughter and there are scary ones out there with dangerous machinery.

As others had stated, over wrought nut job.

Loopytiles · 06/09/2017 17:01

I have anxiety issues and would freak out at the sight of chainsaws in anyone's home, I even freak out above knifeblocks!

I would not, however, ask a tree surgeon out!

Loopytiles · 06/09/2017 17:02

My anxiety would be about accidents, not massacres, unless it was an imaginative day!

HardcoreLadyType · 06/09/2017 17:04

Yes, BackieJerkhart and HotNatured, I get that the OP is a tree surgeon.

But look at it from the woman's point of view.

She walks into a house in the evening with a man she barely knows, and there are chainsaws lying about. Even though her brain is telling her this person is a tree surgeon, it doesn't mean she might not be freaked.

So, as I posted before, yes, she was unreasonable, but as a person with an imagination and some empathy, I can also see why she might be a bit uncomfortable in the situation.

Halfsack · 06/09/2017 17:07

Haha sounds like you're well rid pal. Not like she walked into a dump. Just a few chainsaws hanging out. What a div.

Talith · 06/09/2017 17:07

She was bonkers. Reminds me... I went on a date with someone who made replica guns/ film props and his house was in the middle of nowhere. I recall looking around at wall to ceiling weaponry thinking haaaang on... Is this how I die? Grin obv I didn't and he was nice enough but it did spook me.

KitKat1985 · 06/09/2017 17:11

Yes she sounds a bit bonkers. I can only assume she was having some 'issues' thinking about how you guys would work on a long-term basis with her 4-year old involved, and went into 'batshit' mode when she realised your house was not child friendly (completely understandably so since no children live there)!

Gorgosparta · 06/09/2017 17:14

She walks into a house in the evening with a man she barely knows, and there are chainsaws lying about. Even though her brain is telling her this person is a tree surgeon, it doesn't mean she might not be freaked.

She asked to see his house. Asked to go in. She totally had the right to say 'actually this may not br a good idea as we dont really know eachother'

She didnt need to go off on him because he has work equipment in his house and starr banging on about it not been safe for her dd......who wasnt there.

BackieJerkhart · 06/09/2017 17:14

She walks into a house in the evening with a man she barely knows, and there are chainsaws lying about.

If he had strongly insisted she came to his house you would have a point. But in this case she wasn't the one insisting she get a nosey inside. He didn't even suggest it.

HardcoreLadyType · 06/09/2017 17:17

Yes. You may have noticed that I said she was unreasonable.

bananafanana1 · 06/09/2017 17:17

Yup, lucky escape their OP.

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 06/09/2017 17:17

I'm also childishly giggling at your scene setting Blush
She is clearly batshit crazy & it's lucky you discovered this so early on.

thatdimwitmakesmemad · 06/09/2017 17:19

I think it's more strange she was happy to go to your house randomly without notice but then freaked out that you hadn't prepared in advance for her DD who wasn't even on the date!

Maybe it was the wine but I wouldn't want another date

Notreallyarsed · 06/09/2017 17:21

She walks into a house in the evening with a man she barely knows, and there are chainsaws lying about. Even though her brain is telling her this person is a tree surgeon, it doesn't mean she might not be freaked

Not really, she asked to go in so it's not like he planned it. Also, I could see that she'd be freaked out if there was plastic down and duct tape lying beside them but honestly, chainsaws lying about in a tree surgeon's house are about as normal as sparkie's tools in my house (DP is a sparkie). Now if he was an office temp, I can see why she'd have panicked.

The80sweregreat · 06/09/2017 17:22

Block and move on.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 06/09/2017 17:23

She's barking! A very lucky escape matey, seriously, she's bonkers!

She invited herself to the home of a man she barely knows then freaks out that he has a couple of chainsaws in there, even when she knows he's a tree surgeon. She's an idiot.

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