Male beauticians and waxing!!

[Emboo19]

This is based on a friends experience, not mine and it's not so much a AIBU. But we've been discussing it at length and I'm interested in others thoughts.
So would you be ok with a male beautician doing intimate waxing? Would it depend on quite how intimate, so a bikini wax would be ok, but a all off not so much?

I'm not actually sure myself. A part of me thinks it's no different to a male doctor or nurse and I'd be fine with that. Definitely wouldn't have a problem with any other beauty treatments being done by a man, but waxing that invloves no underwear, I'm not sure!!

I guess the disclaimer is that my friends shop is in California right over the way from a drag venue. She's quite hot on discrimination, so yes all of her female waxers do men too.

I agree it's not the same as medical professionals, but then in a good salon staff would be qualified and their certificates

What do those certificates mean though? Just that they've done a course - very often just a one day course - in waxing or whatever. It's not because they might not wax well that I wouldn't want a male doing it, but for all the other reasons. (Security, since it'll place me in a vulnerable position and men are generally bigger and stronger than me; embarrassment at having a male touching my genitals, etc..) And I don't think there is any reason those of us inclined to dislike that should feel bad about it: it's a voluntary procedure that we choose and pay for, we're allowed to choose the beautician we feel comfortable with.

I'm quite particular anyway, eg like the same hairdresser, but no way would I get an intimate wax by a man, I dont need to flash my fanny at a bloke for kicks. I also wouldnt feel the slightest bit angst ridden over it
Pmsl at the concept of bikini waxers as professionals on a par with medical professionals. Goves job is complete. Who needs experts any more?

It has never occurred to me that it should bother me

Nobody has said anyone should be bothered. If you aren't that's fine. Others are entitled to feel differently.

I wouldn't be happy with that. I'm ok with male doctors doing untimate procedures but that's because it's more essential than a beauty treatment and they are medical professionals. A beauty treatment is optional

• intimate

Can't say I'd be bothered either way.
Women do back sack and crack waxes on men all the time, so I don't really see the difference.
If I'm paying for a service and the person is professional, and qualified, I don't really care which genitals they have!

Skaross
It isn't discrimination

I've never had a wax anyway but if I did there is no way I would go to a male waxer. There are only professionals to the extent that they get paid to wax rather than just doing it for a hobby but I hardly think a day course in how to wax (if that) puts them on a par with a HCP. They don't belong to a professional body with all the checks and regulations that involves and really any pervert could become a waxer if they wanted to.

I'd be happy to agree if someone could show me it didn't fit the legal description of discrimination but I know if a client refused to work with me because of my sex the. It would be classed as discrimination.

Hang around a sec skaross and one of us will post a link

Ok, bad network connection but for example in a job itself
www.citizensadvice.org.uk/work/discrimination-at-work/what-doesn-t-count-as-discrimination-at-work/discrimination-at-work-occupational-requirements/

I think the key here is that she doesn't want her workers to feel they are discriminated against and that's her choice. Just as it would be a clients choice to take their business elsewhere.

Oh gosh definitely not!

I find that a lot is being touched and it would just seem a bit weird! I realise they would obviously be professional but I'd just prefer not to!

I don't think I'd be fussed. I've had enough male healthcare professionals become intimately acquainted with my actual vagina that some man with some wax on my bikini line (or even for a brazilian) really wouldn't bother me. I mean I sort myself out usually anyway, but I'm not fussed on who does it so long as they do a good job!

The idea is that exceptions apply for exactly this kind of situation where concept of single sex only is needed because of societal norms eg many women dont want to flash their fannies at random men with one day course quals in intimate waxing

skaross, it's not discrimination for women to chose female therapists.

I think there's quite a variety of different qualifications Somerville the salon I use have all qualified as beauty therapist via full time (at least a year) courses, most have equivalent of level 3 qualification, if not they are working towards it. Plus any extra additional courses for specific things, gel nails etc.
I wouldn't trust someone who'd done a day course, I'd just do it myself in that case. Same with nails I wouldn't use someone who's just done a course in gel polish, I want someone who's trained in manicures and all aspects of beauty therapy and done a gel polish course as an additional thing.

But I agree that I want to be able to choose who does my treatments, and I'm not sure I'd choose a man for waxing.

No, it isn't discrimination to for women to choose female therapists and because most women would not be okay with a man doing an intimate wax, a business will have a good case for not employing male waxers.

It wouldn't bother me. I worked as a beauty therapist for years and can assure you that when you have waxing done the therapist isn't thinking about the fact they're looking at intimate areas, they're looking at the way the hair grows, where is best to stretch or ask you to stretch etc. It's all just skin and hair at the end of the day.

skaross it's not really up to your friend to define her customer's personal boundaries. If they don't want a man to see and touch their bodies then they don't have to explain it or feel any guilt whatsoever.
To be honest, I wouldn't be surprised if your friend goes out of business with that kind of attitude, and it would be thoroughly deserved.

I'm actually changing to her on FB as this thread progresses. This is what she's said "because of the position of my business (opposite the Drag venue) I've worked hard to make it an inclusive community and while it probably doesn't meet the definition of discrimination I won't have my staff judged because of their sex. As a large part of my customer demographic is male then I would not employ females who would not wax men and I make that clear in interviews. I understand that a male waxer would
make some women uncomfortable and if that's the case I'm always happy to refer them to one of the two other waxers nearby"

*chatting to her

Funny way to run a business, putting the feelings of your staff ahead of the feelings of the paying customers.

US/CA state law is also different on this, I guess, Skaross. In the UK I suspect she might leave herself open to accusations of discrimination from an interviewee with, say, religious objections to waxing someone of opposite sex.