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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that it IS rude?

475 replies

Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:32

A friend posted on facebook the other day about having a work man other who pooed in her loo without asking. The comments were all saying how rude and disgusting it was. Some even saying to report him or that they would have kicked him out. Anyway I mentioned it to a friend who didn't see the problem. But I do think that it's rude aswell so aibu or is it rude not to ask?!

OP posts:
purpledonkey · 24/08/2017 08:42

Do you not poo?
This is ridiculous. The guy is human. He needed a shit. Do you expect him to dump in his lunchbox and take it home?

cardibach · 24/08/2017 08:42

I feel like you're changing the goal posts now, OP. It was clearly about a poo, specifically, at the start. Presumably the workman would ask where the bathroom is, which is code for 'Can I use it?' As you wouldn't need to know where it was otherwise and nobody sensible would say no... if he was a plumber working in the bathroom, then popping out to ask would be a bit silly.

BlurryFace · 24/08/2017 08:43

Would she rather he take more time away from the work he was doing for her and drive to a public toilet (assuming he could hold it that long) or go and ask her neighbours if he could use theirs? Otherwise, she would have given permission anyway as any reasonable person would (though a reasonable person would wonder why the poor bloke felt he had to ask).

Threenme · 24/08/2017 08:43

What bluntness said!

ZeroFuchsGiven · 24/08/2017 08:43

My loo is open to everyone and anyone, I work from home and have numerous delivery drivers and customers here daily, I always offer the loo and shock horror a hot drink!

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:44

No what she put was about asking permission but she was most offended by the fact he pooed and didn't ask permission. Because it "stunk the place out" in her words. I don't think she would have minded if it was a wee.

OP posts:
Redsippycup · 24/08/2017 08:45

It's far far ruder to broadcast to the world that Fred The Builder just had a poo, surely?!

What's he supposed to do? 'Excuse me, can I use your loo please? Btw, it's for a poo...'

Where would she have preferred he did it? In her garden perhaps?

With any luck other trades people will see what she has written and not work for her - how awful to try to shame someone over a perfectly normal and private bodily process.

BTPlonker · 24/08/2017 08:45

I think it depends what he was doing. If he was there giving a quote, or doing a 10 minute job, then yes it was rude, and unnecessary. If he was there all day, then of course he was going to need to use the loo at some point, so I don't see the issue.

AtHomeDadGlos · 24/08/2017 08:46

Better in your bog (what it's for) than in a bush in your back garden.

Ask to use the loo perhaps, but not to specify what he'll be doing. As long as they're no shit stains left on the pan get on with it. If there are then it's a 20 second job to clean it yourself.

cardibach · 24/08/2017 08:46

So it isn't about asking to use the toilet then. It is about poo. No, OP, it isn't rude to have a poo without specifically asking.

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 24/08/2017 08:46

Yes, please can I use your loo is a polite question, having to specify what you want to do in there is weird and bonkers.

JuicyStrawberry · 24/08/2017 08:46

Does she have windows in her house and some air freshener?

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:46

When someone said to report him I guess they mean to his employer? I wouldn't go that far personally.

OP posts:
KoolKoala07 · 24/08/2017 08:46

What would you rather, that he shits in the flower beds in your garden.

WizardOfToss · 24/08/2017 08:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:47

Well just to ask to make people aware they are gonna stink the place out.

OP posts:
Huppopapa · 24/08/2017 08:48

Was she able to test the accuracy of the saying "It sank like a turd in a workman's lavvy"? Grin

Willow2017 · 24/08/2017 08:49

I suppose it's polite to ask but I really find it strange that you need to ask to use the toilet. It's a basic need we all do it so why have to announce it to everyone?

Just use it I don't need to know you need a p or poo. If you are in my house as a guest or working help yourself it's not some precious artefact it's a toilet ffs.

It would servev your friend right if he needed to leave the house to find a parking space and a public loo and took him an hour each time so the job took longer to finish.

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:49

I'm only saying what the Facebook post said. A workman used her loo without asking. He pooed in it and she was horrified and thought it was disgusting and he stunk the place out. I take that to be abit of both so rude not to ask and rude to poo in someone else's toilet. I think it's both. But then I wouldn't dream of pooing in someone else's toilet.

OP posts:
WizardOfToss · 24/08/2017 08:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:50

We all need to eat aswell but you wouldn't just walk into a strangers house and just start munching from their fridge or cupboards would you?

OP posts:
Original poster
Dancingfairy · 24/08/2017 08:51

I think it's both! That is allowed you know, to think more than one thing.

OP posts:
AfunaMbatata · 24/08/2017 08:51

If he didn't go have a shit he'd probably end up farting all over the place .

Sirzy · 24/08/2017 08:52

Very rarely you need to eat straight away. You can also take your own food with you.

The two aren't comparable!

Passmethecrisps · 24/08/2017 08:53

I find these threads so very weird.

We have had a fair number of folk in doing work in the last wee while. If in the house for a few hours I just presume they will help themselves to the toilet. Most will ask the first time and then go ahead the rest of the time.

f the person was in the house for just a very short time then I might be slightly surprised that they needed to go but I would presume they were caught short. Having a DH with IBS I suppose makes me more sensitive to the fact that people don't always have the choice whether they hang on. Did the person make a big mess? Not flush?

If someone I followed on FB posted about this it would be them I was judging rather than a tradesman.