To not pay friend back?

[Forevergazingupwards]

Going through a bad break up and asked to see friend but she was busy that night and invited me to go with her to London the following weekend to visit a mutual friend.

I asked her about train tickets and at the end of the week she bought and paid for us both.

The night before my grandma died and so I didn't go. Now a month later and friend is chasing up the money for the train ticket. I don't think I should have to pay, aibu?

What's a reverse?x

It's been answered twice already!!!

Give her the bloody money OP and stop being a tightwad!!

Is this a reverse?

If not, OP, why does your friend have to pay for your train ticket?

If I was in your position I would be embarrassed I had forgotten and pay straight away. She is not unreasonable to ask for it. However, if I was your friend I wouldn't have asked for it.

I imagine if the ticket was only £5-10 op's friend mightn't have bothered pre-booking. OP is unreasonable. The "give me £20" analogy is spot on.

When I've had friends cancel coming to gigs, they have either tried to sell their ticket and/or asked me to do the same, either to a friend or a stranger outside. If it can't be re-sold, they have to pay for it. Being a grown up means honouring your commitments, even when bad stuff happens.

Stop being a child, of course you owe her the money. Going through bad times doesn't mean your friends should pay your way.

I just lost my mum, and that is a crock of absolute shite OP. I'm sorry. Using a bereavement to avoid paying debts is pretty vile tbh.

^THIS X1000

I'm sorry about your grandmother, YABU about train ticket.

Condolences on your loss. And sorry about the breakup. Yes it's a shit time for you OP. But that doesn't mean people should pay your way. Most adults have been through a break up or lost a grandparent at some point, but it doesn't wipe out our responsibilities.

Unless she actually agreed to buy the train ticket as a gift, you need to pay her back. She's given you a month before reminding you. She probably felt awful asking you, but she may need it. Your bereavement doesn't cancel out her bills and financial responsibilities either.

Losing a good friend will only add to your shit time. Pay the poor girl back and count your blessings .

Why do people do this?

"I am (X) therefore (Y) is justified"

Connecting two completely unrelated issues.

Sorry for your loss OP

Re the train ticket you need to pay it. It's pretty childish to expect other people to pay your way in life.

YABU

and what is a reverse?

AH just saw the explanation on previous page...

Of course you need to pay her back!

Haven't seen the explanation sorry Lweji or wouldn't have asked...

A reverse is that OP is the friend owed payment for the train ticket but is posting from the other party's point of view to check that her own real opinion is NU.

She should have claimed for the unused ticket, then she would only have been £10 out of pocket(fee), which morally is down to you
Can you even get refunds for train tickets after the time to use them has passed??

Just looked it up - generally you can get a refund on train tickets but not usually on Advance Tickets.

www.nationalrail.co.uk/times_fares/ticket_types/46583.aspx

Sorry for your loss OP and I say this as someone who has lost all grandparents and both parents - the money has nothing to do with it. You owe your friend money so yes YABVU.

I'm amazed you have to ask the question. Of COURSE you should reimburse her. Some friend you are. Your personal

Yes.

Well I'm a grandmother and I sincerely hope that when I die, my grandchildren don't use my death as an excuse to get out of their obligations.

This puts it so well. I was struggling to articulate what was sticking in my craw so much about this.

Definitely YABU. Just think how you would feel if a friend had agreed as you did and then had to cancel after you had paid in good faith for her ticket. Fairs fair, so pay her your share.

A good friend wouldn't put someone in the position that they have to ask for money back.

I'm sorry you lost your Nan. I doubt there's many people on here who haven't been through a bereavement at some point but that doesn't mean we'd expect others to take a financial hit. Unless friend murdered your Nan then there's no reason not to pay.