Do your family take it in turns to pump on the Christmas tree?

[OverTheHammer]

DSs friend has just asked me this. He said at Christmas, whilst putting the tree up the whole family take it in turns to pump on it. He then asked, dead seriously "do your family do the same thing?". DS looked at me as though we'd been missing an essential part of Christmas all these years.

AIBU to think this is beyond weird to say to your mates mum??!

Oh my god I almost pissed myself!

The pumping family: do you think they do it with uproarious laughter and ribaldry, or do you think it's a serious occasion full of ceremony?

Because I like to think they all approach the tree one by one and produce their Christmas pumps with roughly the same degree of solemnity as the Queen laying a wreath at the funeral of a foreign dignitary.

My niece, when she was about 4, used to say clucking instead of farting, I like to remind her now and again, she is 26 now

I think I concerned myself too much with trying to work out the logistics of it to realise how funny it was 😁 I mean seriously, what if one family member can't produce a pump? I don't think I could squeeze one out on demand, even if there was a Christmas tree to aim at 🤔

YABU for calling it pumping.

I have never heard the expression 'pump' so it took me a minute to understand. This has made me laugh more than anything in months.

It's totally mad!!

Absolutely hilarious. I'd say someone did it by accident one year and then said it was a tradition and they all believed it.

O Holey night

This dates back to 17th century Derbyshire.

It's really not that uncommon

Is it just Christmas that they celebrate with the sharing of their bodily functions
or all major holidays?
Pissing on the pumpkin at Halloween, shitting in an Easter bonnet. Where do you draw the line??

So that's why I didn't get my book light for Christmas? I didn't 'pump' on the tree, I'll be sure to do it this year!!

My niece, when she was about 4, used to say clucking instead of farting

When I was little I genuinely thought a fart was called a pardon, because my mum made us say 'Pardon me!' whenever we did one.

To this day my mum will say 'Has someone pardoned?' if she smells something unpleasant.

Two farting threads and it's only Monday

You must ask his Mother about it the next time you meet at a school event.

FFS, with my irritable bowel, if I tried to force a fart I'd end up decorating the tree at the same time. 🎄💩😳

It's what Jesus would have wanted.

Give this poster a medal

I don't think I could squeeze one out on demand, even if there was a Christmas tree to aim at

Hahahahaha, that's me gone AGAIN

You're right, there's no way I could just produce wind at will. I'm not Le Petomane FFS

What a strange family!

What happens if they have guests for Christmas?!

Even if he was just having you on, I have to give it to him, it's an unusual scenario .

This is hilarious! I wonder if it was something that just happened one year and then it was so funny that they did it another year and it became a weird in-joke that no one was supposed to know about.

I'm not sure how that just happened by accident though.

This is going to catch on!

I cannot wait to put up the tree this year and try it.

By 'pump' I thought you meant a Benny Hill style groin jiggle. I'm not sure which is more

Do you think the lad's mum is an mner and is reading this with the colour draining from her face?

Now I think of it, this might be a good way to ensure the In Laws never invite themselves over for Christmas again

Also do they get a real proper tree or is it an artificial one?

Absolutely howling at this.

I have nothing to add but hahahaha.

Intrigued so just had to google if this is a thing. Judging by YouTube it is, there's loads of arses farting on trees, who knew?
There's also an arse farting O Christmas Tree down a flute