Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Swimming party in private pool...should parents stay?

198 replies

Witsender · 08/08/2017 12:04

Very outing but hey ho.

Having a swimming party for daughter at my parents' house at the weekend. When we invited her friends we specifically said that it is a private pool, no lifeguards and that parents are responsible and should bring all swim aids etc.

When I messaged today to tell people the address and ask numbers for food (invited whole family as know it is the weekend and we need adults etc) and one mum replied to say she would just be dropping off and be back later.

Kids are 6/7.

I can't decide if I am comfortable or not? There will be lots of adults there, but I am uncertain of taking the responsibility for another child in a busy setting when I have two to watch already.

What does the MN massive think?

OP posts:
Yika · 08/08/2017 13:16

Glad all sorted. Have a lovely party.

RatRolyPoly · 08/08/2017 13:21

She probably really did just forget about the pool element.

Vonklump · 08/08/2017 13:23

Drain the pool Grin
OP, if you didn't specifically mention the pool would have water in it this is definitely an option.
Failing that had you thought about hiring a lifeguard?!

I think this sounds like a great party, (v envious) and as you have specifically stated with the invitation parents are required to be responsible for their children and provide flotation aids the parent can rearrange her drop off plans or find an alternative adult. (Nice try on her part though.)

YANBU

DeannaTroika · 08/08/2017 13:29

Theres as much danger of injury as trampolines and bouncy castles - and I bet lots of MNetters have those

There is not as much danger of death from trampolines or bouncy castles.

Viviennemary · 08/08/2017 13:30

I'd be very wary indeed of even holding such a party in a private pool. Are you insured if anything goes wrong. But if you're not happy about the unaccompanied 6 year old then it would be reasonable to say then I'm afraid he/she can't come. No way take responsibility for unaccompanied child at pool with no life guard.

Viviennemary · 08/08/2017 13:31

Didn't see it's sorted. Good.

LoyaltyAndLobster · 08/08/2017 13:36

We have a pool in our house and I would never hold a "private pool party" for DS and his friends, but in your situation the children wouldn't been allowed to attend if an adult wasn't staying with them.

LoyaltyAndLobster · 08/08/2017 13:37

Glad it's sorted, hope you all have a great time 🙂

bangingmyheadoffabrickwall · 08/08/2017 13:37

Pleased you have it sorted!

We have pool parties or 'pool playdates' quite a bit and parents are 100% responsible for their child(ren). It works well and we always have 'spotters' walking along the side.

MrWriter · 08/08/2017 13:43

Have a great party, could you cordon off the deep end so the kids can only get to a certain depth that would be safe?

JustHappy3 · 08/08/2017 13:44

Another one interested in your parents' insurance. I know it's all sorted now but surely you need to be more aware of what that requires in terms of supervision.

carefreeeee · 08/08/2017 13:50

Sounds very sensible to ask parents to stay at that age. Even in public pool with lifeguard you can't leave your 6 year old there alone - there needs to be an adult with every 2 under 8's. Sounds like you have a similar policy at your party so it should be fine. Parents watch own kids and if there is a need the trained family members can help with first aid.

There's nothing magic about a trained lifeguard - they are just someone that is watching out for anyone in difficulties. Yes people occasionally drown in pools. People also die crossing the road. that doesn't mean you should never cross the road.

I think you are right to stick to your plan and insist parent stays with 6 yo. Might be different if a bit older.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:52

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.

EWAB · 08/08/2017 13:53

What I would be worried about here is because it is a private party people will take the piss and rather than worry about people dropping and running you should be worrying that they will see it as an opportunity for the entire family to go swimming. You will get two parents and they will shove a sibling into the mix. I don't know what would be worse in this scenario, older siblings or toddler ones.
I know people do this especially if they think the host is quite well off.