AIBU to think it's OK to be a crap feminist?

[Moussemoose]

Inspired by another thread.

I am a feminist but:

I am a feminist and I want to control my own vagina BUT I want that fanny waxed.

I am a feminist but I luuurrrvve reading shit romance novels.......

OK over to you

DioneTheDiabolist

I can not go into what an appalling feminist sex makes me. I'd have to name change. All I'm willing to say is I'm a very, very bad girl

That should read an apparent , not I'm anot apparent. For some reason my phone did lots of auto corrections to my last post (anal sex became analysis sex).

sorry dione totally reading fail.

I'm a good feminist because I'm shit at English, art and apparently reading.

Why fight fair? Why kill a man with your bare hands when you can give him a poisoned chocolate chip muffin and watch him expire without chipping your nail varnish?

ThroughThickAndThin01 you probably could actually make a living out of it 😂

I spend a big chunk of my expendable income on beautiful oppressive shoes and handbags. I like it when my DH tells me they look nice .

A lot of the examples that supposedly make women "not a feminist" are really stupid. I am definitely a feminist and have done a lotto feminist activism and that is reflected in the way I treat other women, respond to sexism and the way I vote and generally interact.

If I wear lipstick and get waxed, does that cancel out my activism and my views on rape, equal pay, maternity health, reproductive choice, etc.

Would I be a better feminist if I did nothing practical but renounced makeup and waxing?

Surely the trivial arguments that seem to serve purely to undermine and divide us are just a distraction from working together on the important issues. So many of us are feminists. For example, not many of my friends identify as feminists but not one of them is pro-life or believes it's a woman's fault if she gets raped.

Bemused- OK perhaps Jane Austen was a bad example, but I love books where women don't have jobs and just get married, go to balls or run church jumble sales.

WilheminaFloyd

Bemused- OK perhaps Jane Austen was a bad example, but I love books where women don't have jobs and just get married, go to balls or run church jumble sales

I like books where people have lots of sex, yep, that's my main criteria. So you are doing better than me.

And PoppyJ1 indeed feminism does not have to be grim, serious and divisive.

I'm a feminist and I watch Top Gear.

Morphene I have been told that loving anal/other types of sex makes me a bad feminist and is damaging to women. I in turn am saddened when "good" feminists tell me that feminism stops them from enjoying sex/achieving orgasm.

guiltyfeminist.com/

Credit for "I'm a feminist but.." should go to Deborah Frances-White and Sofie Hagen and the Guilty Feminist podcast.

Unless anyone knows of an older example?

I'm a SAHM who knits and can't do maths or parallel parking (good old dyscalculia) and wears makeup BUT I'm also a loud politically active bisexual phd student who does all the household spider removal on account of DH's robust apprehension of said creatures.

On a humourless note - I don't think choices are made in a vacuum but I also don't think belittling other women's choices, however patriarchy-driven, is a feminist action. We're all in this together.

I gave no idea why anyone thinks that feminists don't like bras or wear makeup or don't work or like sex, or hate men, etc, etc.

I have NEVER heard a woman deem any of these "bad" things to be feminist qualifications, only women saying they are not feminists because they do these things.

Being a feminist only means you believe men and women should have a level pegging in the social structure. That women aren't less than men. I have never thought equality to be particularly radical.

Bird, I have definitely been told these things make me a non-feminist, maybe even an anti-feminist.

Really? By idiots surely.

Well, I think so. No, by highly educated and extraordinary women.

If that came across as sarcastic, it wasn't meant to. Genuinely phenomenal women who just seem to think that we all need to sacrifice ourselves for true equality.

Agree @Moussemoose! I think sisterhood is probably more important than the rules. Especially on a practical level.

I am a "mumsnet" feminist and radical feminist.

I'm still a mrs though.

melvin well that's depressing.

Ooooh I forgot that the kind of sex I enjoy is deemed anti feminist by some. I don't understand why having unenjoyable sex would liberate me, tbh.

I am a feminist and so is my wife. We are both called Brian.

I am a Mrs also, which is on a level with the Mr. Equality for all!!!!

I know this thread is lighthearted and a bit mocking, but I do think it would be interesting to see a similar thread from men:

"I'm crap at being a serious man because I love watching action films, playing Xbox, Marvel comics, go-karting, care about my appearance, work part time to spend more time with my children..."

Stereotypically male hobbies and interests are rarely treated as something to apologise for or something a bit embarrassing that detracts from how serious they are in the way that say baking, crafts, romance novels, romantic comedies, make up and women's fashion are.