Are you a feminist?

[NoLoveofMine]

Yes or no...

No such thing as a better or worse feminist BlueKarou.

Blue - sounds like you might be 3rd wave intersectional feminist (says the unread non feminist)

Who do you want to include?

To qualify. I like men. I also like women. I also like to feel that I am not treated worse by virtue of the fact that I have a vagina. I also believe boys should play with barbers and wear pink tutus without criticism if that's what makes them happy. I think, in essence, I'm humanist.

of course there are better and worse feminists. Feminists are at war with each other. Disdain and hate for each other.

Which bursary, @SplatController?

Feminists I know just support one another.

Well what kind of feminist are you OP? I see different groups completely at odds with each other.

I try to oppose misogyny and hope I can support women and girls in whatever I do.

I would once have said yes.
Then I had a daughter and would've said HELL YES.

Nowadays I'd possibly, at a push, if a yes or no answer was my only option admit to a yes. However, I'm more comfortable being a peoplist (or a humanist or something like that) because I want my daughter and sons to have equal opportunities in life.

Somehow, being a feminist doesn't feel like standing strong, in a 'girl power' way anymore.
Describing myself as a feminist feels almost too angry.
Too wrong.
Too far away from what I feel.

I asked my DS recently if he thought he was a feminist.
He asked what it was. I didn't (or couldn't because who knows what the correct definition is anymore) answer but said based on what you know about it, would you say you were a feminist.
He said he would only say he was if it meant the opposite of sexism but otherwise he'd say no and can't we all just get along?
I quite liked that response actually.

The lectures I've received on the few times I've ventured into the feminist boards definitely left me feeling I was being looked upon as a lesser feminist, NoLoveofMine. Long time ago though, all the faces have changed since.

I'll have a google of 3rd wave intersectional feminists, thanks bambambini. I was being a little flippant using 'inclusionary' as a sort of opposing stance to the TERF point of view. I suppose I'm wanting to include everyone in my idealistic equality, regardless of where they fit in the realms of sex, gender, sexuality, etc. I want everyone to have the same rights and freedoms, no matter whether they're straight or pansexual, whether they're gender fluid or trans or (I don't want to say cis as I know it offends people, but it really is the most eloquent way of saying it imho) whether they identify as the gender corresponding to the biological sex they exhibited when they were born (apologies if that phrasing isn't great either! I'm never sure which syntax is going to cause the least upset!)

I just want everyone to be happy and unafraid and not treated better or worse on account of their differences to the next person. I do struggle to see how it's possible for everyone to be 100% equal, but ultimately that's what I would like to be working towards.

Sorry, very waffly post. Really shouldn't MN at this early hour!

Interesting post @splatcontroller
Shame if you had to name change for the Sophie slip up though, SplatConroller is an amazing name!

I just want everyone to be happy and unafraid and not treated better or worse on account of their differences to the next person.

I feel the same and that's why I'm a feminist.

The feminist board on here I have found to be so welcoming and encouraging. Speaking to the women there has made me more confident and helped me day to day. I'm very grateful for those I've been able to speak with there!

Bluekarou
I agree totally with that most succinct waffle.
I'm way too tired and drunk to be contributing not only to an AIBU but also Feminist thread at 3am!
Might have to get some cocoa and wander off into chat

Yes, in an OED definition type way, where I simply believe in equality for men and women.
My husband is therefore a feminist too, by that definition.

I will be raising my son as a feminist.

I want to live in a world where no child or adult will say, "I can't do that because I'm a girl/boy".

I love my equal rights, yet I remain painfully aware of unconscious bias, being on the receiving end of it on a daily basis.

I think feminism will only be no longer required when we all stop being such shits to our fellow human being.

Yes, of course

Agreed Notlost.

The irony is that with trump in charge and movements like Islamic extremism, we need feminism more than ever. Have none of you read Margaret atwood?

@AssassinatedBeauty

A veterinary medicine course.

"“Of this year’s graduate entry for the doctor of veterinary medicine students over 90% of the intake is expected to be female. This is a trend seen over the past five years along with an increasing trend away from rural practice,’ the statement read.

“The inclusion of males as one of a number of preferences by the donor is to address the current underrepresentation of males in the student cohort."

source

Stories like this and the failure of blind recruitment are, to my mind, glaring examples of the lack of need for feminism as well as the reason that @unnaceptable's son is bang on the money. The gap between what feminism meant and means is enormous. It's kinder to let it die gracefully.

No.

Yes.

Depends on whose definition of feminism we're using

No. I don't find the term in the least bit helpful in addressing what my response is to any particular circumstances or ideology.

Asking the question "do you believe in equal rights for women" as the sine qua non of whether or not the person being asked is a feminist is pointless. Of course I do. Why would I not want exactly the same opportunities and rights as a man? But after that it all goes a bit haywire.

For example I am profoundly opposed to the idea that prostitution/ porn/stripping etc can be or ever should be seen as a valid job choice . I support the Nordic model. That accords with radical but not liberal feminism.

I did not change my name on marriage- never occurred to me to do so. I have always worked full time other than 2 months maternity leave and am financially independent from my husband.

I am pro-choice.

On the other hand I find much of radical feminist thought takes a very infantilising stance towards women. Terrible things happen and women have no agency in these terrible things because it's the patriarchy isn't it ?

"Wifework" for example. There are endless threads on this. I don't see this as anything other than an issue for individual women to resolve with their partners.

There is on FWR in my opinion an over egging of how terrible it is to be a woman; that we are forced /brainwashed into " performing femininity" as if we were all dutifully turning out as the female cast of Mad Men.

On the other hand I see threads in AIBU which make me see red. Threads which are horribly judgemental of women.

Not that it is particularly relevant but Emma Watson is deeply irritating. She comes across as patronising and shallow.

Absolutely with radfem tendencies! No apologies!

Thank you splat...My family are African. Whilst progress has been made, I disagree that the battle has been won

Depends on whose definition of feminism we're using.

Tell me what feminists or for and against & I'll see if I tick the boxes. But am pretty sure Fems won't have me because I don't tick enough boxes. So doesn't matter what I do or don't identify with, the Feminist club doesn't want me.