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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Kids not allowed - AIBU?

496 replies

SlaggyTwoShoes · 01/08/2017 12:21

Very happy to be told I'm BU but please go gentle if I've somehow been doing things wrong here!!

I've just been turned away from my appointment at clinic where I've been having laser hair removal...because I had my kids with me. It's a 10 minute procedure which I've been having a course of over months so I've always left them (either one or both) sitting on the chairs in reception with my phone to watch tv (very quietly) or pencils and colouring pads. They never run around or misbehave as they've done this a lot - I'm a single mum and have previously lived abroad with them so often haven't had anyone to watch them and just had to bring them with me everywhere.

This clinic is nationwide (uk) and I've been to various locations for a couple of other (quick) procedures and left the kids in reception (the reception is always very quiet and receptionists always offer to keep an eye). I know it's not ideal but figured it's just what people do. Have I got this totally wrong?? This is the first time I've ever been told it's not okay, but it's the first time I've brought them to this particular clinic location. They told me I could leave the kids sitting in the costa coffee opposite (obviously I was never going to do that!) or get someone to watch them...which is going to be really tricky for me. I can't see why I can't leave them sitting safely in their reception for 10 mins like I've always done. So AIBU or are they?

OP posts:

GreenCarnation · 01/08/2017 13:32

It wouldn't have entered my head to hand over responsibility for my children to a stranger at that age. Not least because it's a flipping cheek, but I just wouldn't have been comfortable doing it.

Having no support system for childcare, laser hair removal would have had to wait till school was in.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 01/08/2017 13:34

The laser hair removal (national chain) that I've been in, has always had a clear sign on the reception desk, stating that unaccompanied children are not allowed to wait in reception.

They are perfectly upfront about it.

Gottagetmoving · 01/08/2017 13:35

Whether you would blame them or not is irrelevant. If you leave the kids in reception you are technically passing the responsibility onto a receptionist. Their insurance won't cover them for unaccompanied kids in the waiting room.
At their ages they are far too young to expect them to always stay put and be good, however many times they have done in the past.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 01/08/2017 13:35

Bit sad really that the receptionist doesn't want to take responsibility for something that is likely not going to be any hassle at all.

No it certainly isn't. It's not the receptionists job to look after random DC!

What if something happened.

graceyg · 01/08/2017 13:40

To be honest it depends, on the age & salon.

Also someone said that they couldn't take a baby to a nail salon - christ here in Clapham ( Nappy valley) week day appointments are full of babes in slings! Places would go bust without yummy mummy trade.

NotMyPenguin · 01/08/2017 13:41

YABU. It would be ok for an emergency medical appointment or similar, but you can't just expect free childcare alongside your beauty appointments...

KoalaDownUnder · 01/08/2017 13:43

Their insurance won't cover them for unaccompanied kids in the waiting room.

People keep saying this. How so?

BarbarianMum · 01/08/2017 13:43

Countries in which people are more relaxed about these things are not countries where you'd get very far in taking the receptionist to court if something did go wrong. And are also not countries where people get upset if "strangers" talk to/tell off/interact in any way with your child.

inniu · 01/08/2017 13:44

Where I work we have this issue a lot. No matter how well behaved the child is a minor cannot be on the premises unless they stay with their parent/ guardian.

It is part of our child protection policy and part of our health and safety policy.

Dancergirl · 01/08/2017 13:45

I really can't believe this thread.

OP you've had a battering. If you can't leave two sensible children for TEN minutes while you're behind a closed door I really don't know what the world is coming to.

And as for the receptionist, the OP didn't ask the receptionist to watch them and even if she did, so what? Have we really lost our sense of perspective and common sense and have to rely on small print rules just to watch over 2 children for ten minutes?? The world has gone mad.

OP, you know your dc best, I'm sure you wouldn't leave them if you thought they might run off or misbehave.

YANBU

loubar101 · 01/08/2017 13:46

You've been going there for years & they've always been accommodating with the kids? So how young were they when you first started leaving them?

KinkyAfro · 01/08/2017 13:48

Leaving the kids in reception is leaving them in care of the receptionist dancergirl they don't have a choice! They've now said no, they aren't responsible for the OPs children

Witsender · 01/08/2017 13:50

I've never heard of this not being the done thing. I see kids at appointments all the time! Mine come to doctors, dentists, hairdressers etc with me as necessary and it has never been an issue. Fine for them to say no, but doesn't make them OP entitled etc.

Butterymuffin · 01/08/2017 13:50

If you're in the UK they're on summer school holidays, so book them a day in a holiday club and get all your appointments done then.

Slimthistime · 01/08/2017 13:50

the DC are not the receptionist's duty or problem.

robinia · 01/08/2017 13:57

If you know your children will sit and read quietly, not get up, not need the loo, then I don't think you're BU - some clinics will probably be fine with it because it helps retain their customers. Definitely ask first though and only if you're 100% certain DC will sit quietly.

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 01/08/2017 14:00

Witsender - mine come with me to the doctors and my hairdresser has said they are more than welcome. However I think the fact they are always accompanied by me makes a difference.

The op was not going to be in the same room. She could not supervise them. They were going to be left with the receptionist. It's not on to assume a stranger is willing to take on that responsibility. Fine some other clinic said yes. This one said no.

Original poster

SlaggyTwoShoes · 01/08/2017 14:02

Yeah a blanket ban I can understand it's just that I'm stuck for this appointment having done this in the past and them being so fine with it.

I hardly dare say this given the response I've had but my salon has let me bring them on a week day in school holidays - my hairdresser suggested it! I bring all manner of things to entertain them and we sit upstairs where it's really quiet. I guess that's helped lull me into a false sense of security that people are willing to be a bit flexible as other posters have suggested. And being abroad where people love kids and are so much more welcoming of children has warped my perception. I'll know for next time (can't find anywhere else yet because I've paid them a fortune I saved hard for, for a course up front) but if they'd said in the past 'for next time it's not going to be possible it would have been helpful

OP posts:

chirpyburbycheapsheep · 01/08/2017 14:06

Hi OP yes I was wondering in my earlier post about the cultural thing. I always wonder how people from certain countries view our attitude to children.

Hope you get it sorted and yes they should have had a clear policy from the start!

Original poster

SlaggyTwoShoes · 01/08/2017 14:09

Dancegirl - thanks! Glad someone out there is on my wavelength! I'm baffled by all the responses that I'm expecting free childcare! I'm expecting nothing from anyone as I've made a risk assessment that it's a safe quiet place for 10 mins where my kids will sit silently (yes I do give them earphones to share!). Insurance is another matter, I just wasn't aware of it

OP posts:

HerOtherHalf · 01/08/2017 14:10

as if I'd blame anyone else if my child fell and cracked their head open! That's made me laugh out loud!

Some parents would though. The same as some parents would go ballistic if the receptionist dared to tell the children off if they were misbehaving. Bottom line, the receptionist is not there to keep an eye on your kids and if they are not old enough to be left in Costas etc alone then they need an eye kept on them.

Witsender · 01/08/2017 14:14

Mine come in to the doctors, but not always the dentist.

aaaaargghhhhelpme · 01/08/2017 14:26

Witsender - that's fine if you're ok with it and your dentists receptionist is ok with it.

It's the assumption of a receptionist being ok with it that's unreasonable.

RainbowsAndUnicorn · 01/08/2017 14:27

Just book them into whatever childcare you use whilst you work, it's not on to leave them in a clinic alone. If too young to leave home alone they are too young to be left in a reception area alone.

Slimthistime · 01/08/2017 14:38

in your OP you say "but it's the first time I've brought them to this particular clinic location"

then later you seem to say they let you do it before - but they didn't?

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