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AIBU?

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Original poster

To say I'd rather stick hot pins under all of my fingernails than go to this?

173 replies

Caenea · 30/07/2017 11:44

An email has come through from a "committee" of people I went to secondary school with.

A reunion is being arranged for next July(!) to mark the 10 years since we all left Year 11. They are inviting me to not only go, but give a speech and be a "VIP"

The why and wherefores of this are because I was the only person in the entire year to actually move more than 50 miles away from home to go to university, the only person to go to university without a single other person from school in tow, the only person to remain in the university town after the degree was over and apparently I was a very popular person at school and everyone is very curious about what I've been up to...

Well, this is news to me, because my life was a living hell at that school. I went to the other end of the country for a reason. Even people who claimed to be my friends would push and push and push until the "jokes" were long over and I was nearly in tears. I never went back for the same reason. I hated my home town, I hated my school and I hated everyone there with three exceptions.

Would it be very unreasonable of me to reply telling this "committee" that I would literally rather boil myself in zoflora than attend this event?

OP posts:
TuckMyWin · 02/08/2017 13:08

"It's a long way to come to reminisce about the time you set fire to my jumper, or threw a bag at my head. Thanks for the invite, but I'm not going to be able to come."

Then block.

kaitlinktm · 02/08/2017 13:10

Paxillin's is the best response - there is no comeback for them from that and it makes it clear that you don't want them to have your email address.

DakotaFanny · 02/08/2017 13:11

I am rubbish at things like this but on this occasion I would have no hesitation in replying "I don't want to attend regardless of date".

You don't owe them anything.

IfYouGoDownToTheWoodsToday · 02/08/2017 13:12

Oh I would be so tempted to send back what Tuck has written.

"It's a long way to come to reminisce about the time you set fire to my jumper, or threw a bag at my head. Thanks for the invite, but I'm not going to be able to come."

If it makes you feel better, do it! Why should they get away with doing those nasty things. You have been able to forget, why should they?

fruityb · 02/08/2017 13:13

I'd rather do the same. Loads of people I went to school with never left their towns and still all hang out together being vile no doubt!

RiverTam · 02/08/2017 13:16

'No date will ever work for me.'

And block.

ShesABloodyLoon · 02/08/2017 13:22

Ha ha! I could almost have written this. My instant reply was, "Fuck no. Why the hell would I want to go to a reunion?!"
I moved almost 200 miles away and have no one in my FB really. Maybe one or two that I don't interact with but that's it.

Beadieeye · 02/08/2017 13:28

(I haven't read all the replies or updates yet, but my initial response is)
Not a sodding chance. They are being nosey at best or up to their old passive aggressive tricks at worst. They have even nominated you to do a speech and be a VIP to either save themselves a job, or to take the piss, tbh.
I would take pleasure in shooting this one right down.

QueenofallIsee · 02/08/2017 13:29

Dear committee,

I was being polite, I don't want to attend the event I'm afraid so the date change will make no difference.

Best wishes
C

CoughLaughFart · 02/08/2017 13:29

Let's face it, if these people are as bad as you think, you will be damned either way. Go and give the speech and they'll be saying 'What a show-off; so full of herself'. Refuse to go and one of the main topics of conversation will be how think you're too good for them.

You'll be slagged off either way - so you may as well just enjoy not going.

LeakyLittleBoat · 02/08/2017 13:33

Dear Cuntmittee,

Just to be clear, I have so many calls on my time I'm unable to commit to your event regardless of date. Again, thanks for thinking of me, hope it all goes well.

leghoul · 02/08/2017 13:36

I would go and make a load of stuff up
Or
Not go, and reply that you will not be in the country on those dates, or any dates

OliviaStabler · 02/08/2017 13:36

I am usually polite but I'd be totally honest on this one Grin

Dear Xxxx,

I see you didn't take the hint from my last email. To be clear I was saying FUCK OFF!

Yours Never,
Caenea

PyongyangKipperbang · 02/08/2017 13:37

"You are right that I am not connected to anyone from school on social media. Have a think about why that might be.....
I will not be attending"

steppemum · 02/08/2017 13:38

I would be so tempted to go, give a speech about bullying, giving lots of examples, talk about how it made you determined to be xxxx strong enough to do yyy etc etc. Talk about your determination to put as much distance between your home town and the bullies and your new successful future.

Perhaps wonder what happens to the people who were the bullies? Did they ever regret it? Do they even realise how their actions effected others? Did they ever learn that, or did they head off into adulthood with such poor people skills that they never woke up to the fact that they destroyed another teen's life.

Thank them for the opportunity to come back and tell them that you hope you never see any of them ever again.

Then graciously sweep out.

MinesaPinot · 02/08/2017 13:39

Dear xxx

What bit of 'no' don't you get?

Regards
Caenea

Breathe, then block, then have a glass of Wine.

leghoul · 02/08/2017 13:39

Oh blimey, saw the update.
I probably would not reply at all.

TheLegendOfBeans · 02/08/2017 13:41

100%

Massively

Totally

Without question

DOOO NOT REPLYYYYYYYYYY

user1486669405 · 02/08/2017 13:47

Give them a date. Agree to do all the speeches, etc and then send an email on the day declining to attend due to work commitments....helicopter needs a service, butler has a migraine, etc

Beadieeye · 02/08/2017 13:49

⬆️ pahaha, excellent plan

TheLegendOfBeans · 02/08/2017 13:50

oh my god, user has it!

DeadMorose · 02/08/2017 13:58

I would probably say something like "it doesn't matter, on any date you'll offer I'm going to be busy washing my hair (ironing my shoelaces/blowing dust around with hairdryer/drying fishes in my aquarium/watching paint dry/inhaling and exhaling oxygen). Have a good day."
But I'm rude like that.

FittonTower · 02/08/2017 14:02

I had something similar happen - not an invite to a reunion but a group of girls who were utter shits to me when I was at school came back into my life and to be fair to them they had grown up and were pretty nice adults. They also remembered our school days differently and didn't realise or remember that they had acted in a way that meant I was still pretty angry with them. I just politely kept well out of their way and when one of them pushed it I (slightly less) politely told them to keep out of mine.
I feel a bit bad about it now because we were kids at school and kids can be real shits without realising the effect they're having and, like I say, they seemed to be ok people once they'd grown up. But some of the stuff they said and did back then still makes me feel like I'm 14 again and crying in the toilets so they can sod off.
As for the reply I'd probably just tell them not to try and work around you because you're really busy and important.....

nina2b · 02/08/2017 14:02

Do not say thanks or wish then a great time. Either say, "No." - just the one word - or ignore totally. I would ignore and block

nina2b · 02/08/2017 14:02

...them...