To not answer the door if I don't want to?

[Meowstro]

Just that really. I don't answer the door (on a busy road) unless I'm expecting a parcel or someone to pop in which would have been arranged or they can call once there. I don't even pretend I'm not in, I just don't care. AIBU?

I never answer my door, unless it's the postman or expected.
DH is always curious and will have a look and sometimes answer. But I never do.

gabsdot

You sound almost smug about how annoying you are. Definitely well suited to the role I'd say.

Get a RiNG doorbell then you can see who it is before you open the door !

gabsdot - My job involves cold calling and if no one answers the door, I have to call back . So instead of opening the door the first time and telling me to get lost, the householder will get me back ringing the bell several times. I'd much prefer the first option.

And my elderly mother would prefer it if you'd bugger off and NOT cold call as it causes her pain to get up and answer the door to bloody cold callers. If there's no answer the first time piss off and leave people alone.

I'm the same. My mum isnt and if someone doesnt asnwer the door she goes round the back to check. She once got my to round the corner of my cousins house when i was 10 and i caught her in the living room who was certainly not her husband. And STILL my mum does it!

Some of us had it drummed into us by our parents "don't answer the door"; admittedly this meant don't answer it as children. But old habits die hard.

But depending on where you live, sometimes more than half the callers are ne'er-do-wells or unwanted callers, such as chuggers, burglars casing the joint, Jehovah's witnesses, salespeople. If you see roads where every other house has a "no cold callers" sign, there's a reason for that.

Business models are based on a certain failure rate: a chugger might expect 10% of people they ask to sign up, a leafleting company might expect 1 in 1000 people to buy from them. This is why they do junk mail and cold calling so ruthlessly; they're expecting most people to refuse, so they try a large number of people.

What I cynically wonder sometimes is if chuggers "share information" about who the "yes-people" are. Officially they probably mustn't because of the data protection act, but I wouldn't be at all surprised if they do. With internet advertising, I very rarely click on a pop-up advert, because I'm sure that doing so adds me to a database of "this person clicks on our ads, keep spamming them!" We all know that if you do sign up to a charity, they see you as a "yes-person", so they'll be calling you to ask for a bigger donation.

So therefore, some of us take the view that a closed front door gives the message to those who persist in the name of business: DON'T EVEN BOTHER.

Rockofages I'm sure this is going to be taken badly and theres nothing I can do to change your opinion but, firstly, you've knocked at my home which I haven't asked for. If I wanted to give to charity I'd do it (which I do, in fairly generous sums but when I can afford to) and don't need to feel pressured into it in my own home - this also goes for religious preachers and MPs. It isn't a slight to you, I just feel it IS pressuring someone by catching them off guard when they are entitled to peace in their own home. If I don't answer, that tells you I'm not interested which is exactly the same as answering and telling you so. Some charity workers are very pushy and vulnerable people are getting targeted to sign up for monthly costs that they may not be able to afford. In actual fact, my DGM had to get a sign asking people not to knock due to this (we started to realised she'd signed up for all sorts). The sign hasn't worked 100% but imagine, this is also an elderly woman, not steady on her feet and getting up for someone selling or collecting for charity.

Secondly, they is no way of me verifying you are from said charity and my money will get there or me knowing if as soon as I get my purse out, someone isn't going to come round the corner and grab it off me/push past into my home.

I'm not a monster, I'd answer the door if I note a sense of urgency to it but most of the time it's absolute crap in which case whoever it is can leave a note (if I hear the letterbox then I check the door straight away).

wanderings chuggers descend on my road like locusts on a regular basis, no doubt because the electoral role shows many elderly people. I have a suspicion the elderly are more generous, by which I of course mean easier to bully 😐

It might be someone telling you there's a fire in an upstairs bedroom.

This sort of happened to me once.

I worked in a shop that was part of a much larger building. We had locked up for the night but a man started banging on the door. We ignored him thinking that he was a customer pissed off because we were closed (this happens a lot in retail). He kept banging and yelling. We were right at the back of the shop and couldn't hear what he was saying. Eventually we went to the door and he told us that the building was on fire!

I'm not well at the moment. The other night my next door neighbour came to the door with a card and a bottle of fizz. The neighbour also told us that we had a wasps' nest and all sorts of helpful things. I would never ignore a doorbell. It could be anything.

I get weird about it sonetimes the door knocking makes me feel like a hunted animal......or im not properly dressed or covered in toddler snot or just not ready to talk to other humans. Ive hidden in the gatden shed once from a hello fresh lady eho wouldnt go away! 😂🙈

I don't answer a lot of the time if I'm not expecting anybody. Nobody I know would come around unexpectedly so it's unlikely it's going to be anyone I want to talk to.

About ten years ago I answered the door when someone knocked in the evening to an angry drunk man asking for money. About three years ago I answered the door to somebody who looked very high who claimed he had cleaned my windows (he hadn't!) and was demanding £10. I don't live in a particularly rough area. I think I'm best to carry on ignoring the door.

I do find it odd that there are so many people on here saying that they'd never answer their door - don't get me wrong, I expect a few people won't with very genuine reasons such as a medical reason (physical or mental health). But just because they aren't expecting someone etc strikes me as a bit odd!

I always answer the door. It's often just the neighbourhood kids calling for my DS's but occasionally it is a cold caller. I always give them a chance to say their opening spiel and then say thank you but no thank you. If it's a charity, I explain that we cannot afford anymore than what we already currently donate. I've never ever experienced someone being rude in response. Usually they thank me for their time and move on. Have the people who say that they get rude responses considered that maybe their attitude to the person could (not always) be contributing to the response?

If you have difficulty getting up to answer the door, put a no cold callers sign up - maybe even add a note on there to say they will be reported to the police if they knock still?

As well asy full time job I sell Avon. I tend to just see people I already know - but do have a "territory". I don't like bothering people so what I do is put a little note with the book (first time that I go to a street) and explain that I'm their new Avon Rep and here are my contact details. I then say that if they don't want to receive a book it's no problem and ask people to tick a box to say if they want a book or not and then jot their house numver down. When I go back to collect the books, occasionally people don't leave them out. If the person has a no cold callers sign, I won't knock - I just make a note that the book wasn't left out. If there are no signs up, I will knock and make a point of apologising for interrupting them, asking if they got the book and asking if they are happy for me to bring a book in the future. I've never encountered anyone rude to me when doing this.

I genuinely think that people will respond with an attitude if you give them attitude! You never know where or when your oaths may cross again and you could one day need that persons help.

Oh - What the fuck is a "chugger"? I am guessing not a train......

Does anyone else think it's a sad world where people don't want to talk to others these days? There are so many people that don't even know their neighbors because no one wants to make that effort anymore.

Chugger = charity mugger.

I don't answer the door - the postman/parcel delivery people know to leave things in the front porch and nobody else knocks on my door except JWs and sales people. Ditto the phone; it's always junk calls so why bother answering it?

Yanbu, you absolutely do not have to open the door to anyone, unless you are expecting them or a delivery. That is your private space and they are intruding.

I say this in reference to blooming doorstep sellers or Chuggers

Yanbu I only open for deliveries, the rest of the time it's just chuggers, sales people, JW/Mormons so I cba.

I always answer the door but chuggers/ charities and other randoms get very short shrift.

@LoliPoPCunteen, I know what you mean, I suffered trauma as a child and I have 2 young DDs myself and I hate opening the door, especially when it's just me and the girls at home. I've drummed it in to them not to open the door if I'm not with them, unless it's DH or their Granny, or one of their friends who live locally.

I had a nasty experience a few months ago. The DDs opened the door to a salesman who came into the house while I was on the toilet!!! That really unnerved me, it could have been anyone.

Another thing to consider is that someone might have an injury or be unwell. I remember what it was like when I had a badly injured ankle a few years ago.

If it's urgent, why not shout through the letterbox, as others have said, or write a note and push it through the letterbox?

There are all sorts of reasons why someone wouldn't answer the door. I don't understand the people who were prepared to let a week old kitten die though, that's horrible. Glad you got the kitten back.

Only on mumsnet do people not answer the door.....

NDN came home about 8pm last night, granddaughter due over a week ago. So I knocked to find if she was here yet, thought they may have been visiting. The answer was no, they'd been watching other son play cricket. Lived next door to neighbours for 28 years, seen children turn from babies, young children, teenagers and now men. I know them and I'm interested.

But of course on mumsnet

1. I should not show interest, it's their GC not mine

1. The DGP would not have seen child until at least three months as mother only wants her family for the first three months

3.NDN should've ignored door, I was not expected so therefore unwanted

Luckily, my world allows for random acts of interest and kindness and not assumption that I'm nosey, judgy or trouble!

So if a neighbour knocked because they needed something? Like locked out and needed to climb over fence to get in, you would just ignore them?

So much for good neighbours.

We don't answer the door here either unless its a parcel or someone I'm expecting, and neither does my brother - i can see them coming in my front garden though so i know who it is/what its likely to be ie if they're carrying a package or a parcel I'll answer it, same if it was the police or something important. and I'd probably answer if it was a friend but I'd be pretty pissed off tbh as i like to be told if someone is coming to visit at least an hour before.

I have visions of the non-door-openers constantly positioned at their front windows watching for unwanted visitors.

Yanbu I do this. I do have a spy camera though (Alfred app) so I can see who it is if I want to from my phone

Despite a massive "no cold callers, sales people, canvassers etc." Sign on my door, they still knock. No one I know personally shows up unannounced, so unless it's around post time I don't answer the door. I can never get rid of the charity people and I have no money to spare as low income and a student and I've been caught there for ages trying to politiely decline