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AIBU?

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Original poster

Moving into boyfriends house, ok to ask for 10% of the house increasing each year

161 replies

User1234567889 · 13/07/2017 09:39

Boyfriend owns his house outright. I'm planning to move in and we will split all the bills 50 / 50. As there is no mortgage there are no housing costs for either of us.

What do you think about asking for 10% of the house in the case that we break up and this going up 5% for every year we live together until it caps off at 50%? No children together yet but I want to be protected and not end up with nothing.

OP posts:
e1y1 · 13/07/2017 11:05

Thanks serf - just seen as now read what mypatron put and RTFT.

although shouldn't need to, as should have just been put in the op instead od dripfeeding

VeryButchyRestingFace · 13/07/2017 11:05

OP has backtracked and said it's a reverse @e1y1**

We know this. See my post at 10:16.

OP has fucked off anyway. 😭

LouHotel · 13/07/2017 11:08

Do you mean to pay your boyfriend 10% each year of the house total worth so within 5 years your on equal footing?

That i believe would be a fair move.

But if you think living with him entitles you to a percentage then if he agrees you are a very shrill businesswomen and he's a chump.

GinSoakedTwitchyPony · 13/07/2017 11:14

Absolutely agree Invisible.

Mummyoflittledragon · 13/07/2017 11:19

She gave up her job as well. The way you're presenting it is she hasn't moved areas. It sounds as though she had a tick list and it's all coming together.

Not working ☑️
Living rent free ☑️
Owning my own home ☑️
Pursuing my dream of being an artist ☑️
Not contributing to the household ☑️
Getting a joint account (can you find that one out pleaaase)

Can you post the same question on Nethuns and come back and tell us what the Huns say??

Deffo unreasonable unless this is this similar to the scenario above presented by InvisibleKitten

MyPatronusIsAUnicorn · 13/07/2017 11:22

😁😁 WORRA

I ACTUALLY FORGOT CAPS WAS SHOUTING, JUST TRYING TO MAKE IT STAND OUT. BUT NOW I LIKE IT Grin.

Original poster
User1234567889 · 13/07/2017 11:35

IM SORRY ILL DO BETTER NEXT TIME

She is moving areas, from a big city to rural sw. But no where near what was described earlier.

OP posts:
mygorgeousmilo · 13/07/2017 11:36

Ha!

InvisibleKittenAttack · 13/07/2017 11:43

sooo, she has to give up her job when she moves in then? Not jut wants to? She's moving away from a city with lots of opportunities to rural area so won't have the same chances to earn if she wanted to? To a part of the world she may well not choose to live in?

seriously, she might not want to put it all over facebook, but it does sound like theres had to be some haggling because otherwise this isn't a good move for her.

LaArdilla · 13/07/2017 11:43

"... but I want to be protected and not end up with nothing."

You seem to have misunderstood was financial protection is. 'Protection' is about ensuring that people who give up their careers (and earning potential) to raise children are not, along with their children, left homeless and unable to earn when the homeowner or high earner throws them out. It.... PROTECTS them. Clue's in the name.

It's not for randoms to bugger off with half your house.

You have nothing you need 'protecting' from as you are taking no financial or life-altering risks. You're not giving up your job, are you?

You'll be living rent free, so save your money. You will then, in the event of a breakup, have saved far more than you would have done renting or buying yourself. You will be in a better financial position anyway. You will be protected.

LaArdilla · 13/07/2017 11:44

Oh, she is giving up her job.

Well, that's stupid.

But she'll only have herself to blame moving to the arse end of nowhere with no job. She might as well lock herself in the gilded cage now.

RB68 · 13/07/2017 11:45

If you were putting in 10% of current value then paying half the mortgage on the rest of the value then yes. BUT not in this instance - put your rent money in an account elsewhere, when you have enough get your own property and make your own money - you have no right at all to his property

WorraLiberty · 13/07/2017 11:46

MyPatronusIsAUnicorn WHAAAAAAAAAAT??? OHHHHH ERRRRRRR QUARTER TO 12 I THINK Grin Grin

Original poster
User1234567889 · 13/07/2017 11:47

Well she's giving up her job and not looking for a replacement in the new area where she would be able to get one within a hours commute.

OP posts:
Euphemism · 13/07/2017 11:51

I have read the thread but want to make a point about property in Scotland...
If you bought your house before marriage and it is later used as the matrimonial home (ie where you live with your husband) it then becomes matrimonial property and will be split in a divorce.

"The exception to property owned prior to the marriage is that where the matrimonial home is purchased before the marriage with the intent for use as the matrimonial home; this would be included in the matrimonial assets, as would any furnishings and other items for the home purchased prior to the marriage."

Intent is irrelevant if that is where you end up living together.

Just that there's a number of posters who seem to think their property is safe in Scotland if bought before marriage. It isn't necessarily safe.

I bought my home long before I was married but as we lived in it together while we were married my ex was entitled to a share when we were divorced.

PearlyPinkNails · 13/07/2017 11:52

Oh you were "asking for a friend"

Alright then

Euphemism · 13/07/2017 11:54

I should add that the mortgage and deeds were in my sole name and he was still entitled to a fair chunk of the value of the house... Angry

Roomba · 13/07/2017 11:59

Haha, I think this is actually what my ex expected would be happening when he moved into my house then didn't spend a penny on it for several years!

He was so adamant that I had to sell up when he left that he even made an appointment with a solicitor so they could write to me ordering me to sell up and give him what he was 'owed'.

Strangely, I never did get a letter, or a court order and he refused to tell me what his solicitor had told him. Funny, that...Hmm

VeryButchyRestingFace · 13/07/2017 11:59

Just that there's a number of posters who seem to think their property is safe in Scotland if bought before marriage. It isn't necessarily safe.

In the article you quote from, it talks of the property being purchased before marriage with the intent for use as the matrimonial home.

That doesn't apply to me. I bought my home 9 years ago. Not dating/living with anyone currently.

Nevertheless, I intend to take legal advice if/when the situation crops up.

BraveBear · 13/07/2017 12:00

There's probably more going on than you are aware of OP. I can't believe the scenario would be as simple as you describe. Anyone who agrees to "Yes, I will move into your home rent free thank you. But if you dump me or I dump you, you owe me 10% of your house value" is such a mug I'm amazed they've been able to hang onto a property at all!

YetAnotherSpartacus · 13/07/2017 12:04

Well she's giving up her job and not looking for a replacement in the new area where she would be able to get one within a hours commute

She's nuts. Look, I've had the same offer, but I said 'no' because it would put me at financial risk. You/she need to think this one through before you move.

Euphemism · 13/07/2017 12:05

VeryButchyRestingFace - I get that... but if you were to marry and end up living there it doesn't matter what your original intent was. it is by default the matrimonial home.

Euphemism · 13/07/2017 12:09

(been there, done that, had to give him 35% of the equity and it was only that low as he was too cheap to get his own valuation)

PersianCatLady · 13/07/2017 12:12

What do you think about asking for 10% of the house in the case that we break up and this going up 5% for every year we live together until it caps off at 50%?
I think if you actually do this then I wouldn't be surprised if he told you to get lost.

BertieBotts · 13/07/2017 12:13

The "MN line" about getting married is for when you're planning to have kids, and the protection is of the sacrifice that the (usually) woman makes by taking time out of her career to care for the children.

Unless you're planning to be a housewife it doesn't really work if you don't have children.