To expect to leave my dd's pooey nappy at friend's house?

[Lalunya85]

A while ago when DD was about 10 weeks old we went to see friends at their house for the day. They have two dds but they are older (11 and 4 at the time so out of nappies).

Our DD did a poo and we changed her St friend's house and put the dirty nappy in a nappy bag. I asked my friend's partner who was near me at the time what to do with the dirty nappy. She sort of laughed and said: "you're not going to leave that at My house!"

At first I thought this was a joke. It wasn't. Then I assumed she must mean to take it to the bin outside, but that wasn't what she meant either.

So we had to take the nappy home with us in the car. It was a 3 hour drive, if that makes a difference.

Obviously we got rid of the nappy at the first public bin that we saw, but aibu to think this is a really strange and unusual attitude?

Or am I so lost in baby parent world that I can't see how unreasonable it would be of me to expect my friend to throw my baby's nappy in her bin??

Give me your verdict.

A nappy properly bagged from a 10 week old baby won't smell at all

I beg to differ...ds3 is 8 weeks and breastfed so should have fairly inoffensive poos. We did put pooey nappies in the kitchen bin, tightly wrapped and bagged but realised that after a couple of days the smell does start to leak out. And we have the same black bag in the kitchen bin for up to a fortnight so that would be a problem.

We have a carrier bag outside where they go for a few days before being put into the black bag just before going out.

Weird. I would have told u to chuck it in the outside bin

I usually take the nappy bag put it in my kitchen bin then empty the bin once they leave. I wouldn't expect a guest to even run to my outside bin never mind take it home.

This is like people who complain when a guest uses their toilet.

Tbh when ds was small I just automatically double bagged his nappies and put them in his changing bag to bring home. Wouldnt have occurred to me to leave them for others to deal with.
Otoh if someone asked me, I would just stick in the kitchen bin and empty that when they left.

My in-laws used to make us take even just wet nappies home with us, felt like it was cold and heartless.

Daily Fail alert chaps...

You'd have to have the arms of a Russian shot-putter to wring the shit out of a nappy of a ten week old baby.

My friends and I are the only ones who would take turns to sneak it into the hostess's handbag for them to find after we'd left then?

When my kids were babies and I had to change them at my grans I never used her bin or her wheelie bin. I put as much poop down the toilet first then put the nappy in a nappy bag then put it in the dog waste bin at the bottom of her street

It wouldn't occur to me to leave a poopy nappy at someone's house - I'd just always wrap them up and pop them back into the changing bag. if they then said "Oh, just leave it in the bin" I would do that, but as a default I wouldn't EXPECT to leave a nappy in someone's bin, inside OR outside.

I'd have put it in the bin outside tbh.

I always take them to the outside bin. That's what bins are for, waste! Unreasonable is changing it on a dining table (My in laws did this with their ds on my dining table despite being offered the changing area we use for my dd or anywhere reasonable they like!).

I bring dirty nappies home with me unless the bin collection is the next day or something. My gran is 2 hours away and doesn't want to be smelling dirty nappies for 2 weeks until the next collection. It goes in the boot,then in the bin when we get home. No big deal. I'd assume I was taking it with me unless invited to leave it in their wheelie bin too

My kids are well and truly past the nappy stage so I really wouldn't want a shitty nappy in any of my bins especially as it's so long between bins being emptied nowadays. That's why nappy sacks have handles; so you can carry them home. I may make an exception when grandchildren come along because their poo will smell of roses

I'd rather have it in the kitchen bin - it will get emptied pretty quick and it's better to have it in a decent thick bag when it's potentially sitting in a hot bin for two weeks.

In any case, household waste these days is generally getting incinerated rather than being landfilled, so you can reassure yourself that the energy in that poo is being recovered!

I'm getting a huge case of deja vu with this post. It seems to be word for word what I saw a few months ago, to the extent when I clicked the link I was expecting the number of kids, long drive home etc. Weird!!

To answer: mumsnet is a weird place where people carry fecal matter in their bag because of "manners". If you would let an adult use your toilet, you should allow a visitor to place their bagged nappy in an appropriate lined bin - or, if you cannot bear it being there for an hour or two - facilitate it going into an outside bin somehow.
If you cannot do that, you are a bad host and furthermore if you ever have any continence issue or a baby and dont choose to isolate yourself you are a hypocrite.

Only on MN would this need to be spelt out.

red those are tie handles, same as on all refuse bags.
By your logic, you are claiming your own grand children must live in dirt because of course their bins at home are emptied every 2 weeks. Thus, if they use nappies, those nappies are too long (by your standards) in the bin.
If your children can bear to live like that, with full family nappies, you can bear to have ONE nappy in your house ffs.

If you had a range of guests round would you make your friend take a nappy home but offer the bin to your son/daughter?

Your grandchildren's s**t doesn't stink any less you know. If it's too unhygienic for you it's too unhygienic, end of story. If it's ok it's ok, end of story.

I'd honestly thought this couldn't get more odd but having some guests allowed and others not..!

I certainly don't get people worrying about a little shit in their outside bin, even though I wouldn't want to go through that nappy stage again. It doesn't seem to me to be hospitable to guests to insist that they take their baby's pooey nappy away with them.

I never would leave a pooey nappy at someone's house. I would put it outside by the front door and pick it up on the way home.
They stink, you should take it home. But it's just a short term problem as they'll be potty trained soon.

I always asked if it was a friend I knew fairly well or who also had a child in nappies. Most people said to put it in the nappy bin or the outside bin. If it was someone I knew less well or who didn't have young children I bagged it and brought it home in my nappy bag.

If I'd asked and someone had said they didn't want me to leave it there I wouldn't have been all that surprised. It's a bag of human shit after all .

Once my DH left one of (toddler) dd's poo nappies in a childless friend's kitchen bin on the day when they were hosting a party later in the evening. I was mortified. I texted to apologise profusely and sent a huge bunch of flowers. I still cringe thinking about it. DH just hadn't thought, though we don't put dd's poo nappies in our own kitchen bin, so I have no idea why he decided this was acceptable .

I did used to regularly take pooey nappies away with me myself, it wasn't an issue to do that. I preferred to just put them into my nappy bag and put them straight into our wheelie bin at home. It meant I didn't have to ask my host.

But I don't at all have a problem with guests using my wheelie bin.

Argh comma splice error! Should have said; "DH just hadn't thought. Though we don't put dd's poo nappies in our own kitchen bin, so I have no idea why he decided this was acceptable"

I am honestly baffled that some people have to wait 2 weeks to get their rubbish taken away... Where do you put it all? I go through a bin bag each day, so by the end of the week that's around 7 bags of rubbish, where would I put 14 bags of rubbish until collection!? Surely it wouldn't all fit in one or two bins.

I doubt he thought at all. Although I will say that wouldn't have bothered me even in the days before I had my DDs. At least it was in a bin!

I'd have been embarrassed in your shoes, though, having said that.

Yes, was very embarrassing! Our saving grace was that the lovely couple had loads of very smelly Camembert in their fridge, so it wasn't exactly an odourless kitchen anyway.