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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's fine for DS (17) and DD (15) to share a hotel room?

278 replies

singaporeslingshot · 09/07/2017 17:43

We are going to Australia to stay with friends via various Asian countries this summer.

I was chatting to a friend about our plans - the majority of the holiday will be spent with friends where DD will share with our friend's daughter and DS our friend's son.

The hotel stops on the way out and back (5 nights total) DD (who is 15) and DS (who is 17) will be sharing a hotel room.

I told my friend this and she was horrified that they would be sharing. Really? At what age did people stop their DC sharing on holidays like this?

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 09/07/2017 17:46

How do they feel about it? I have 2 DSs so never really had a problem, but as a 15 year old would not have wanted to share a room with my 17 year old brother unless absolutely necessary.

Original poster
singaporeslingshot · 09/07/2017 17:46

Said friend seems to think its an issue of privacy, and also because DS and DD don't really get along (he can be quite domineering with her) so I suppose that may be why it bothered here. But I really can't see the issue in the short term.

OP posts:
TeenAndTween · 09/07/2017 17:46

I know I didn't like sharing with my brother when I was a teen, but if your kids are fine with it then not an issue. I guess if necessary you could share with DD and your DH with your DS?

LIZS · 09/07/2017 17:46

Ours do at similar age. Single rooms are £££

DontstepontheMomeRaths · 09/07/2017 17:46

I've had to. Can they just lock and change in the bathroom?
Is it a twin room?

Sirzy · 09/07/2017 17:47

If they don't get on then I don't think I would do it.

Sparklingbrook · 09/07/2017 17:47

Can your DC see an issue though?

Original poster
singaporeslingshot · 09/07/2017 17:48

It hadn't occurred to me to ask them what they want to do. We're the parents and what we say goes, financially this makes the most sense and means we can have the holiday of a lifetime for all of us.

I don't know, just think my friend is being a bit silly. The kids will enjoy their holiday and it's affordable for us.

OP posts:
HoneyIshrunktheBiscuit · 09/07/2017 17:48

I always had to share with my brother when I visited grandparents.

titchy · 09/07/2017 17:48

Mine are 16 and 18, opposite sex, and happily sharing a room, and a large bed on holiday.

FuckyDuck · 09/07/2017 17:48

I think your friends insane. Sounds absolutely fine to me!

Musicaltheatremum · 09/07/2017 17:49

Mine always have. DD now 24 DS now 22. In fact we (all 3 of us) shared a suite on a cruise ship, they had single beds and I had the sofa bed which was lovely. We also shared hotel rooms for 2 weeks in the states. Halved the hotel costs.

GreenTulips · 09/07/2017 17:49

Sometimes I can help a relationship if they have space just the two of them - wouldn't bother me

Sparklingbrook · 09/07/2017 17:49

It hadn't occurred to me to ask them what they want to do

Why ever not? Sharing a room may not =holiday of a lifetime for them if they don't want to.

Bonesy1 · 09/07/2017 17:50

Again, 18 year old daughter, 16 year old son, share a twin room often on holiday, they have no problem with it

alltouchedout · 09/07/2017 17:50

It hadn't occurred to me to ask them what they want to do. We're the parents and what we say goes
Ah.
Perhaps you should ask them.

amicissimma · 09/07/2017 17:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bruffin · 09/07/2017 17:52

Mine dd 19 and ds 21 happily shared room for 3 weeks last year in US, only one hotel where there was no twin dd shared with me and ds with dh.

Original poster
singaporeslingshot · 09/07/2017 17:52

Thank you all. Glad to hear some sensible comments.

"Dnephew and Dneice always prefer to share our comfortable spare bed if they happen to stay with us at the same time, even though there's usually one of our DC's rooms free. They are in their 40s, married (to other people!) and have children. "

That's just bloody odd though, surely?!

OP posts:
raspberryrippleicecream · 09/07/2017 17:52

Last year I shared with my DD, 16, and DH shared with DS1 18 and DS2 13.

She wouldn't have been comfortable sharing with her brother's, so this was the best solution for us. It was only 2 nights.

Sirzy · 09/07/2017 17:52

I think it's pretty sad their feelings aren't taken into account especially as you know they don't get on.

For the sake of a few days it may be easier if you stay with one and your DH stays with the other?

Sparklingbrook · 09/07/2017 17:52

But are you going to ask them how they feel?

Sashkin · 09/07/2017 17:53

I still share with my brother now, and I'm in my late thirties (ski trips etc where our partners don't want to come). We change in the bathroom. Twin beds. Complete non-issue.

On the other hand, we get on. If your two don't it might not be much fun for them. They should be able to suck it up for one night though. What do they think?

vikingprincess81 · 09/07/2017 17:54

It's fine as far as I can see. Will they be able to sleep? Neither has a big snoring/sleepwalking/talking issue? And will they have a private place to get changed/showered - a lock on the bathroom door?
Yeah? Then it's ok. How much time do we really spend in a hotel room when on holiday anyway? It's 5 nights only, and while you're travelling in and out of countries - they'll be knackered and just looking for a place to lay their heads or I was anyway when I travelled to those countries it doesn't matter if they have to share Grin

sonjadog · 09/07/2017 17:54

It's only 5 nights and it's the holiday of a lifetime. They'll just have to get on with it. It's a good lesson to learn in life.