Found a positive pregnancy test in DSDs bedroom. DH will want her out. What the fuck do I do.

[K1092902]

I'm in actual genuine shock.

This isn't one of those "my teenage child is better behaved than your teenage child" because it isnt. She is far from perfect but She knows she can tell me anything and I will 100% support her decision on things.

Anyway- on to the topic.

DSD has been working hard all week and took DD out today as I was feeling unwell. She usually does her own laundry and ironing so I decided to do it for her today. Went to put some t shirts away in her drawers and found a positive pregnancy test. Thinking about it (and I know this sounds odd in a way) but I haven't cleaned out any sanitary products from her bathroom bin in the last 2 or 3 months. I know she has been sleeping with someone and she insisted she was taking precautions but as we all know accidents can happen. I assumed she was on the pill as my periods stopped when I was on it a couple of years ago

I was out when she came back with DD and she is now at work until half 12. I'm going to sit and have a chat with her and I know she is either going to be really upset because she doesn't know what to do or angry because she feels I have invaded her personal space- I genuinely didn't go looking for it. I opened the drawer and saw the end peaking out of a pair of slipper socks and knew straight away what it was.

DH is going to be fuming and will probably want to kick her out (can say this with 90% certainty). I will support her decision 100%.

She is 18 (just)

Your poor dsd, what a fantastic step mum you are :-)

morphene
How could anyone forgive someone banishing their own daughter them calling the police on thier wife for not being home at his beck and call. ( the younger dd is just being used as a weapon to get op home in her 'rightful' place and to prove to his other daughter she isnt important)

Delurking just to say you are amazing OP, I'm glad your DD and your DSD have you in their corner. I hope you're ok.

Sounds like he has reacted exactly as the OP anticipated. Except the police bit...that is positively demented.

I was pregnant at 18 and my dad acted the same way, he didn't talk to me for weeks and even suggested I get an abortion. My baby is now nearly 8 and she is my world and my dad came round and has supported me ever since. Your step daughter is so lucky to have you, you sound lovely x

You sound like a wonderful step-mother and your step daughter's mum will be so proud and happy she has you. Do you know why they split up? Just wondering if it's due to how he reacts to things, he sounds very controlling. I hope you're all ok.

I was a undergraduate with a woman with a young baby. She had a slightly different life from the average 18 year old! But the other people in college were very welcoming and authorities supportive. She graduated with a decent degree and even socialised a bit. Family didn't live nearby and saw no evidence of a partner. Most people in this situation would probably want to let education take a back seat for a while, but just to say that it can be done.

He won't come around. He has reacted exactly as he said he would, with a bonus of threatening the OP with the police. This man is a bully.

Thousands of 18 year olds (and younger) get pregnant every year and although it's not nice to see anyone struggle they get by. You sound like a wonerfull step mum and role model and dsd must be so happy to have at least one rational and supportive parent

Just wondering why op oh has called the police? Did he make up a story about her and their little daughter? I can imagine him doing that. Bit worried we don't know what happened. Hope you're well and congratulations for your DSd!

Just amazed at number of teen mums on MN.

Explains a lot

Wtf does that even mean User?

Don't be a twat User

Explains a lot

Like what?

User, I think that was out of line.

OP, how is DSD and things going today?

User

Oooh you are so cryptic, you must be so superior to the rest of us.

Oh wait a minute you're not, you are actually amazed that on a world wide parenting site with thousands of users there might be a few teen mums, okay....

user1493630944 are you this girl's father?
Or are you just a twatbag?

I was a teen mum. 1st class honours degree, masters and now make well into six figures a year, happily married and loving my life. Stick that in your username arse and smoke it. Give your head a wobble! You're welcome

Sorry op - hope you and dsd are holding up ok x

Ugh, don't encourage him.

(User, I mean.)

And also what's wrong with teen mums who are doing their best for their children, hopefully with support rather than judgement

Urgh so sorry to see that your H has been utterly despicable over it.

to you, DSD and your Mum and of course your DD.

Maybe user means it explains how so many of us have been able to give advice from our lived experiences to the OP, and to prove that getting pregnant at a young age isn't necessarily the end of everything? :)

(Maybe not, but let's be optimistic )

OP, if you're on Twitter, there was a chat last night under the hashtag #youngmumschat (hopefully that link has worked). There are lots of posts on there but basically we had a webchat with an employment solicitor who was able to advise young parents on their employment and education rights legally, and lots of us sharing our experiences of continuing with education and employment after becoming young parents - what went right, and what areas we needed more support in.

If you get a chance, it's worth a read for you or for your DSD :)

I'd love to know how the conversation with the Police went.

You are amazing op, she is so lucky to have you. Hope all is well