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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friends expecting me to look after kids, 6 week holidays.

999 replies

famtastic · 03/07/2017 08:44

I have just found out from another friend, that a couple I'm friendly with who live round the corner told her that I am having their children for them in the summer holidays. It would be 3/4 days a week 6:30am till 10:30am. So in theory we would still have the day after 10:30 to do what we want.

But I have not actually been asked by them! Or had days times mentioned to me. Literally all that was said to me back in may was "we may need the odd favour in the holidays" and I just said oh ok! They didn't elaborate on the favour and I was in the playground taking my kids to school so a bit distracted and didn't ask.

I was looking forward to the summer holidays with my own 2 children ages 3 and 8, lazy mornings and doing what we want, now I feel sick! There is only 2 weeks left and they still haven't mentioned it to me! And surely they can't get anything else sorted now?! Also my husband works 10/11 hours a day and he leaves at 6:50am he won't want anyone round while he's getting ready for a long day at work! And lastly I don't even know their oldest I've met him once for maximum 1minute, their kids are different ages to my two so I can't see how it's going to work well.

Ahh I don't want to do this but I don't know what to do! Am I being unreasonable??

OP posts:
RubyRoseRing · 03/07/2017 17:53

Lunch was late due to the his thread! But it was worth it to see the story develop and see fam's assertiveness grow as time went on. The other mother has totally burnt her bridges now. Favour my foot. Hope you have a great time with your children over the summer.

RubyRoseRing · 03/07/2017 17:54

this NOT the his!

SallyGinnamon · 03/07/2017 17:54

Very over invested now. PLEASE update when your DH speaks to them!

JamPasty · 03/07/2017 17:54

famtastic - you are bloody awesome! I am well impressed at how assertive yet calm your texts are!

GeekyWombat · 03/07/2017 17:55

Hoping your DH is home for backup before the fruitloop arrives. Good luck OP and well done on saying no!

Flowersinyourhair · 03/07/2017 17:55

I'm only amazed that she has time to text such vitriol given that she WORKS!

SexLubeAndAFishSlice · 03/07/2017 17:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spadequeen · 03/07/2017 17:58

WORKzilla's a good one!

MiniCooperLover · 03/07/2017 17:58

Someone needs to remind her that she has never actually ever asked, even once? Why on earth is she assuming you're just staying in every day? Good luck OP

justilou · 03/07/2017 18:00

Dying to hear if she had the balls to show up with her bloody diary.

StormTreader · 03/07/2017 18:00

I think I'd be texting "Theres really no point to you coming round, theres nothing left to discuss. Ive also shown DH the messages and hes FURIOUS."

That might make her pause about marching in and laying out what she expects you to do for her.

YouTheCat · 03/07/2017 18:00

I'd do what StormTreader says.

justilou · 03/07/2017 18:00

Btw - don't stress about how she is at school. You and your friend need to start telling people about this now.

VeuveLilies · 03/07/2017 18:01

No- This woman has to be made to understand that you're not letting her down if she just assumed you would be looking after them.
She has to learn

ChuffMuffin · 03/07/2017 18:01

famtastic I think It's very telling that this woman is furious and going crazy at you , yet she's still quite happy to leave her kids with you! What a total user she is Shock

WhereYouLeftIt · 03/07/2017 18:02

Shhh, Storm - I think it would do her good to try and face down Fam's husband Grin.

TinselTwins · 03/07/2017 18:02

Do what StormTreader said!

AlternativeTentacle · 03/07/2017 18:03

Have you got a diary? Can you in it, every day - 'busy' 'busy' 'busy - no time for babysitting today' etc etc all the day through the summer?

Then when she calls round, go 'hang on I'll just look', flick through it slowly, page by page, and say 'oh no, it appears I am busy. All summer. Like I said'.

headinthecloud · 03/07/2017 18:03

If we get a new thread can someone post a link or something in case I miss it. This has been the highlight of my day.

TwoLeftSocks · 03/07/2017 18:04

Thing is, I WORK at a loss in the school holidays but just factor that in to my income over the year, like a normal person. No way would I lean on friends for the whole of the summer, I'd feel bad enough asking for a day if I couldn't fully return the favour.

thatdearoctopus · 03/07/2017 18:04

Except that WORKZILLA will not be getting anywhere near fam's diary, as the discussion won't get that far.

KatharinaRosalie · 03/07/2017 18:04

Oh what's 2 more kids? I wonder what she would reply if you asked that she takes care of yours every single weekend (you know, the times she's not at WORK) from 6.30 onwards for the next few months or so

LazyDailyMailJournos · 03/07/2017 18:05

ChuffMuffin has made an excellent point. She thinks you are selfish and lazy (because you don't WORK), but she still thinks you are the best possible person to look after her kids!

MsWanaBanana · 03/07/2017 18:05

Op you better start another thread and link to this one as it's almost full. I'm sure there's more craziness to come from your neighbour!!

TobleroneBoo · 03/07/2017 18:07

What banana said - I am hooked

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