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AIBU?

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Original poster

Was my DH BU for making the neighbour wash his dog's piss off our car?

385 replies

Worriedaboutsmear · 02/07/2017 13:03

We have a neighbour about 4 doors away who has several dogs and is often seen walking past our house taking his dogs out. He's never spoken to us since we moved here 3 years ago, never smiled back, and if we are outside when he is walking past, he looks at the pavement. He does seem to talk to some of the other neighbours

A few weeks ago both DH and I were at home during the day, when said neighbour walked one of his dogs past. We just happened to be looking out the front window (as you do when you notice someone walking past), when we saw the dog lifting his leg and pissing against one of our rear car wheels and the bottom part of the bumper . The neighbour didn't seem to make any attempt to tug at his collar, he just carried on looking at the pavement, and so the dog carried on until he was finished. The neighbour then proceeded to carry on with his walk.

DH's instant reaction was to knock on the window to stop the neighbour from walking on, and gestured to him (like a "what are you doing" kind of gesture), he then went outside while I stayed inside.

I saw them have a few words, which was DH pointing at the car and not looking very happy, the neighbour appeared to be shrugging but apologising, and then went back to the direction of his house.

DH came back in and said that he politely asked him to make sure his dog doesn't do his business on our car again and that he wants it washing off. I'm not as assertive as DH so I told him that it wasn't necesssary to get him to wash it off, as long as he tries to not let his dog do it again, but DH's view was that if he was someone that actually acknowledged us from time to time rather than ignoring our existence then he would've taken that view, but why should we when he clearly doesn't like us etc etc

The neighbour appeared about 2 mins later just with his wife now and a bucket and brush.
Whilst washing it off they didn't look up.

Ever since then, the neighbour has gone from not much acknowledging us, to now grimacing at us, staring across at our house when he walks past, and furthermore, making a point of crossing the road just before he gets to our house and then crossing back to this side once past our house.

Could I kindly just ask for the general consensus of who WBU here, should my DH not have said anything and/or not asked him to wash it off? I said to my DH that maybe he felt humiliated but DH said that it's arrogant of him to think his dog can piss where ever he likes and not accept the consequences if it's against someone else's personal property.

OP posts:
Slimthistime · 02/07/2017 13:55

your DH did the right thing
you say "the neighbour appeared to be shrugging but apologising"

if the neighbour had offered to wash it off, I'd think more of him, and I imagine your DH might even have said "oh don't worry I'll do it".

but the shrugging? Just shows the neighbour didn't care. Your DH was completely right. And now the neighbour is acting like a complete git I think.

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 02/07/2017 13:56

Your husband sounds like a self-righteous prick. Does he think he's so wonderful that everybody should want to socialise with him?

EverythingUnderTheSun · 02/07/2017 13:56

Your DH WBU to make neighbour wash the dog's piss off - he should have gone and urinated on the neighbour's car instead.

HTH

(Grin)

PeaFaceMcgee · 02/07/2017 13:56

Good for him.

GabsAlot · 02/07/2017 13:59

i fucking hate shrugging it means i dont care

and up your driveway he shouldnt be on it-twat

SpaghettiAndMeatballs · 02/07/2017 14:01

Good for your DH (v. impressed he got them to wash it off!)

We used to be the last house before the fields that dog walkers used, and still, the number of them that would let their dogs pee on the back of our car (parked on our drive, but v. short drive so the bum of the car was only about a 2 feet from the path.

It's disgusting.

Stopnamechanging · 02/07/2017 14:04

I think it was way over the top given what my car drives through on a daily basis.

Neighbour relations are not going to be any better now.

Bluntness100 · 02/07/2017 14:08

I think it doesn't matter now as it's done. Either way, the neighbour will think you're a pair of dicks, and I suspect some of your other neighbours will too.

I know if I'd watched that little scenario unfolding or was told about it I'd think what a wanker your husband was.

Out of interest I asked my husbands opinion, he's much more tolerant than me, and he sort of screwed up his face and said " well it's not nice to let your dog do that, but I wouldn't have asked that, its kind weird" .

GabsAlot · 02/07/2017 14:10

why is it weird i dont want piss up my car why should he

DrunkUnicorn · 02/07/2017 14:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LurkingHusband · 02/07/2017 14:12

What would peoples opinions have been if instead of dog piss, the dog owner had let his dog leave a nice turd on someone elses drive ?

Would the OPs DH have been unreasonable to ask or insist they clean it up then ?

MadMags · 02/07/2017 14:13

I think your DH sounds like a knob.

I'm sure the tyres of his car pick up worse than dog piss on his travels.

Fair enough asking him not to allow the dog to do it but the washing off is just being a prick.

You don't like the man because he doesn't say hello walking past, so you decided to humiliate him. Nice.

WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 02/07/2017 14:13

Either way it's hardly good for neighbourly relations and your dh sounds like a bit of a dick
Floral it didn't sound as though they had any sort of neighbourly relationship to begin with. Dog piss man has made sure to never interract with them, so nothing's going to change there.

thethoughtfox · 02/07/2017 14:13

Bullying, aggressive behaviour. Completely unacceptable.

WorraLiberty · 02/07/2017 14:14

The issue here isn't the piss or an imaginary turd.

It's that the DH appears only to have asked him to wash it off, because the neighbour doesn't like him/doesn't speak to him.

Piss is piss.

Stopnamechanging · 02/07/2017 14:14

I love that the neighbour is called an anxious weirdo for bringing his wife (which I think shows that he felt intimidated) but fussing over your alloy wheels to the point of demanding they be washed is perfectly normal behaviour Grin.

The trouble is that a lot of posters who hate dogs are attracted to these sort of scenarios (calling them 'beasts' etc), the bigger picture is about preserving neighbourhood relations, which have gone now.

JonSnowsWhore · 02/07/2017 14:17

Why is he a knob & a bully? If the dog had been shitting in their front garden & he'd gone out there & asked the owner to pick it up no one would be calling him that.
Whether it's to do with not wanting piss to ruin a cars paintwork or just letting the neighbour know he can't just let his dog do what it wants, why shouldn't he have told him to wash it off seeing as he made no attempt to stop the dog doing it??

eatabagofdicks · 02/07/2017 14:17

Jesus christ. I'd never let my dog piss on someone's car. Your neighbour is a dick. You should piss on his car

hesterton · 02/07/2017 14:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Stopnamechanging · 02/07/2017 14:20

I was weeed on in a lift once on my first trip out with my newborn dd. It was a man who was blind and had a carer, it was all terribly British though and we all stood there in silence while wee dripped off my pram and my legs Confused

MiaowTheCat · 02/07/2017 14:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bluntness100 · 02/07/2017 14:21

The pee isn't going to damage his car ffs. 😂

I love the fact some folks are saying your husband is reasonable. I wonder if they are the same folk who post they'd shout fuck off at someone in the supermarket in they made a minorly untoward comment and congratulate others on being as abusive as possible, whilst in reality they would never lower themselves to behave the same way.

NoBetterName · 02/07/2017 14:22

To give a little contrast - one of our neighbours once opened his window and started f-ing and blinding at dh (who had recently come out of hospital, having narrowly avoided leg amuptation) because he thought our (female) dog was piddling on the bushes outside his house.

Now, firstly, it was a female dog - incapable of cocking her leg and secondly, she wasn't cocking her leg, she was just sniffed at his bushes (no doubt where other dos had wee'd before). Obviously it was a complete over-reaction on the part of the neighbour who thought it was perfectly acceptable to shout and scream at someone for something they hadn't even done. Funnily enough, neighbour doesn't like dh because he's "forrin" and also funnily enough, when neighbour told others about the incident, he claimed to have, "asked dh nicely and calmly" too (I know this was not the case because my two dc also witnessed the entire thing).

I have to say, I now cross the road rather than walking directly past this particular neighbour's house and won't make eye contact if I see him even though I'm normally a confident person. Mainly because he terrifies me and my children. (Other neighbours have also had trouble with aggression from this man, not that he, or his wife would admit to this if asked).

WorraLiberty · 02/07/2017 14:22

why shouldn't he have told him to wash it off seeing as he made no attempt to stop the dog doing it??

Because it sounds as though he wouldn't have asked a neighbour with whom he was friendly.

Otherwise, the fact the neighbour doesn't speak to him wouldn't be worth mentioning?

Stopnamechanging · 02/07/2017 14:24

view was that if he was someone that actually acknowledged us from time to time rather than ignoring our existence then he would've taken that view, but why should we when he clearly doesn't like us etc etc

Sounds like a bully to me