MIL Surprise, surprise

[AmberStClare]

DP is away from home on a course and have been enjoying this week on my own, slobbing out in the evening after work, eating supper in front of the TV and generally having a nice time.

Just got home from work and opened the front door, walked into the sitting room to find my MIL sitting on the sofa. Cries 'surprise surprise, got the key from your NDN, let myself in and have come to stay for a few days to keep you company whilst DP is away.'

Just rung DP and he is equally annoyed as is expected back Saturday and we were looking forward to the weekend catching up on each other's news and bit of frottage. All out of the window as MIL expects to be waited on hand and foot, in fact just said if I was putting the kettle on she would love a cup of tea, 'And a biscuit dear if there are any going.'

Who do I kill first, NDN for giving out the key without checking with me first (She has never met MIL before as we moved here recently) or MIL for presuming she can do this.

Just tell MIL you have other plans and cannot accommodate her. You either make a stand at this point, or enjoy a lifetime of intrusive behaviour

Just tell her it's not convenient to just turn up - you have already made plans and she will have to go home.

Next time ask first.

I'd be taking the key back from ndn for a start. Get yourself one of those key safes for emergencies and put it as much out of sight as possible.

My mil would try this one. We never mention weekends away now (though few and far between with DD) because she'd always say "That sounds lovely! Wanky 2nd husband and I will come too!"

I muttered "Oh my God" as I read your op!

Can't imagine anything worse than coming home to this invasion

Not sure what I'd to resolve it, but good luck.

Have just told her I have a friend arriving later this evening for the night en route for the airport and flight tomorrow so I will have to book her a B&B, no room at the inn as we only have two bedrooms. She started crying and now feel a complete heel.

Tell her as gently as you can that you really like to know in advance if you're going to have guests.

B&B for MIL not friend! Old school friend, had the Prosecco chilling ready for girly chatter.

Just spoken to NDN and taken my key back from her. She said what a lovely lady my MIL seems so tempted to say she can go next door and stay.

Don't give in, say she should have rung which she bloody well should have!!! How unbelievable

Don't back down now!

Do not give in, you'll get it all the time if you give an inch now.

She started crying?! Wow she sounds a bit unhinged especially to go and ask your neighbour for a key etc. And let herself in?! What if you had left your dildo display out?

Let her cry. She's trying to manipulate you. What she did is absolutely outrageous!!

She should be mortified. Imagine traveling to someone else's house, begging a key from someone else and surprising them. And then expecting maid service.

Good bye and good luck. Stand firm now or you'll never be alone again

You are not in the wrong here, she is!!

Do you have a friend prepped to turn up? Otherwise she might just hang around until they get there... which they won't.

"Sorry you're upset MIL but you really should have just turned up like this. Go home and put your feet up and we can talk about it another time"

Stick to your guns!! 😊

This is why we need a MN team ready to jump to the rescue. You need someone who has recently had a baby/operation/been on holiday who is willing to sit and show MIL hundreds of photos, someone else who has has a real sob story, someone else who has completely opposing political/ religious views to MIL etc all bringing a dish, ideally of a type she doesn't approve of and say 'oh how fun, you can join our girls night in'. You also need to make bingo cards with her key catch phrases and issue them to each of the MN rescue squad. You need someone to sulk in the corner on their phone - for a live MN feed of course. Might not manage it for tonight, but we can have the auditions here tonight (shame you have important work to catch up on all evening ). The team can come over tomorrow evening and then next time she even sniffs dh going away you can promise a girls night in. Oh and we might even manage Ann Summers. How about it?

By the way her behaviour is disgusting and she obviously is used to getting her own way. Don't give her an inch she will take a mile.

Oh, it's a real friend... as you were!

Oh god she started crying?? Has she got form for this kind of ghastly manipulation? How far away does she live? Can she not bog off home?

How far has she travelled?

Oh don't feel bad she should be willing to take the consequences of her actions. I'd flip if anyone landed in on me like that. She had a total disregard for any plans you had made. What if you'd been having a gang over for dinner or something? Stick to your guns.

I would do this team. I'm be quite happy to make MIL so uncomfortable she'd leave.

I'd be telling her all about that bloke I shagged and how the fucker gave me chlamydia.