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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think 7.30 is late enough?

152 replies

EssieTregowan · 15/06/2017 07:47

It's all kicking off in my street. Shock

There's a terrace of five houses, all families with kids of varying ages, and a small block of flats next to it which is mainly couples. The rest of the estate is detached houses.

All the terrace kids play out the front. And now the evenings are lighter lots of them don't come in until 9pm or later. And they are LOUD. Bikes, water pistols, balls, shrieking etc.

One of the mums has complained on our estate FB page and asked nicely that the kids are brought in at 7.30 as she is struggling with hers at bedtime when they can hear the others playing out. The flats residents are backing her up and the other mums are getting shirty and defensive. Insults are flying.

I'm staying out of it (I live down the other end and although I can hear them it doesn't disturb my kids) but I think that actually she's quite right and it's really antisocial.

The loud kids mum's are now saying if it's a problem they should complain to the HA. It's now come to light that they all had a letter last summer from the HA saying that if it didn't improve they'd enforce a curfew.

I'm sort of watching from the sidelines with my jaw open. My kids don't play out as we have a big garden, but I get them indoors by 7.30 if they are being loud as our neighbours at the back have younger children.

It's just common courtesy, isn't it? I'm a bit surprised tbh as they're usually all very neighbourly.

Anyway, what do you all think? How late is too late to be out playing loudly on a school night?

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 15/06/2017 07:48

I think 7.30 is quite early tbh. What sort of noise?

caffeinestream · 15/06/2017 07:49

I think 9pm is fine in the summer, tbh. It's still light out and it's not like it happens all year, or even all summer, given how often it rains in this country!

Original poster
EssieTregowan · 15/06/2017 07:49

It's bikes and scooters whizzing up and down, kids shouting and screaming to each other, the occasional parent shouting and just general noise really.

OP posts:
FuckyDuck · 15/06/2017 07:50

8.30 is fine, 9 is fine but maybe getting towards late. YABU.

They're kids having innocent fun in a safe place

Wolfiefan · 15/06/2017 07:54

Shouting and screaming? Sounds grim. That would really annoy me. My youngest goes to bed after 7. That would also keep her awake. Really anti social. Kids can play without screaming.

ShatnersBassoon · 15/06/2017 07:58

Kids out playing during light evenings is to be expected in a residential area. The screaming etc should be toned down, but nobody should be trying to set a curfew.

StealthPolarBear · 15/06/2017 07:59

Shouting and screaming would annoy me most of the time

sparkleandsunshine · 15/06/2017 07:59

I think 7-7.30 is fine, little kids are going to bed. I used to live in a street just like this (when I had no kids) and always thought this was antisocial behaviour. We used to hear mums shouting stuff like "go out and play, I don't want you in here" and "don't come in until I call you" I think it's usually just parents who would rather stick their kids out on the street so they can have some peace than spend time with their kids and entertain them.
Now that I have kids mine would only be playing out on the street if I was watching them and 7-7.30 is a good time to come back in. That way I know they're not being a nuisance (too many parents don't give a shit if their kids are annoying and disturbing people) and we can actually spend family time together.

FrancisCrawford · 15/06/2017 08:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

caffeinestream · 15/06/2017 08:05

The kids on our street are always out until about 9pm in summer - normally in the garden with family/friends. We're on a row of terraces and our street isn't safe to play on so they go in the garden - you can hear them on trampolines, kicking footballs around or just playing. Far better than them being cooped up indoors for no reason.

runraggedeveryday · 15/06/2017 08:06

I have two that go to bed at 7 and two that go to bed at 8. My kids are loud kids and they are brought in from outside at 6. Well I call them in at 6 so they can all get ready for bed and chill out a bit. It's usually 6.30 or so. Next door has two small children so I wouldn't want to cause a problem for her. I would be pretty annoyed if there was lots of noise outside after 7. Not so annoyed I'd say anything, but would definitely grumble quietly in the house while struggling with kids that won't sleep.

LouBlue1507 · 15/06/2017 08:08

No one has the right to dictate what time other people's children should be allowed out to play! How ridiculous!

MrsOverTheRoad · 15/06/2017 08:12

She can't ask that!

It's nothing to do with her...the age-old problem of older kids playing out whilst you're trying to sleep is one most kids go through.

I remember hearing it myself as a bitter 6 year old.

My Mum wouldn't DREAM of asking the other mums to make their kids go in! Grin

luckylucky24 · 15/06/2017 08:14

I would expect kids under 7/8 to be indoors getting ready for bed by 8pm on a school night. Any kids old enough to stay out are old enough to understand they need to be a bit quieter.

caffeinestream · 15/06/2017 08:15

What about when her kids are the older ones - I doubt she'd be happy if someone asked her to keep them inside at 7pm all summer just because Susie two doors down has a newborn!

iloveeverykindofcat · 15/06/2017 08:15

MsOver
I remember that too! Lying resentfully in bed while it was still light and hearing the other kids still playing out was awful Grin

nannybeach · 15/06/2017 08:18

There is a block of flats a couple of roads away from us, and very young kids are playing (I use the term advisedly!) at 9pm, ever night, more like fighting, argueing, one little girl screaming her head off every evening, I dont know how the rest of the lock put up with it, there is a sort of balcony thing that goes right round the flats, and they play on the end where its widest. I wouldnt think 7.30 was unreasonable, though

pandarific · 15/06/2017 08:19

YABU that's way too early, and it's good for kids to play out.

BUT they need to have they wrath of god down on them in the form of their parents if they're making lots pg noise - not fair on other residents. The issue is the noise, not the time imo.

unicorn5629 · 15/06/2017 08:21

Oh dear .... I used to play out till 10-1030 some nights as a teen during the summer, probably just sat chatting on a wall after 9 though. No one complained to our parents or council. Just had a no ball games sign put up long after I left for uni!

Summerisdone · 15/06/2017 08:23

I'm with the majority; 7.30 is too early when it's lights summer nights.
The kids spend enough time having to be holed up indoors the rest of the year, so I think it's only fair they have a bit more freedom to play outside in the summer.

Perhaps they could all compromise and say 8pm Sunday-Thursday but then 9pm Friday and Saturday, and tell the children that they must keep the noise to a decent level.

Although if I had another person trying to impose a curfew upon my child then I'd get pissed. Complaining about the loud screaming and asking them to keep it down is fair enough, but definitely not insisting on her curfew because she runs things differently in her home.

EdmundCleverClogs · 15/06/2017 08:24

I think 7.30pm is the early side - especially for kids 8+, however I also live on a excessively noisy street so can absolutely sympathise. I feel like an old fogey at times, as I would never have been allowed to disturb my neighbours in such a way, especially kicking footballs against their houses/windows or screaming the street down without repercussions. 'In my day' (TM), if the neighbours were complaining about you, you'd be lucky to see sunlight again anytime soon. There certainly wouldn't be excuses about our behaviour, everyone should be allowed to enjoy their evenings.

Natsku · 15/06/2017 08:27

7:30 is far too early on summer nights, I think 9 is perfectly reasonable.

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 15/06/2017 08:27

I think 7:30 is ridiculously early in the summer. We get so little good weather the kids should be encouraged to enjoy it. Feel like parents can't win our kids spend too much time on screens but then neighbours complain if the play outside.
The summer is so short really. My dc get out a bit later once the lighter nights come in because we need to take it where we can.
The problem of younger dc in bed while others still played out is something that has gone on for years and you can't dictate what others do because your dc complain about it. Once gets are older I'll bet she changes her tune.

Original poster
EssieTregowan · 15/06/2017 08:27

I definitely think it's the noise rather than the playing out.

They also have issues with scooters and bikes being left out meaning people have to move them out of the way of their cars to get out in the morning.

OP posts:
Boynamedsue · 15/06/2017 08:29

If they're old enough to be out until 9pm then surely they're old enough to understand they need to keep the noise down after 7ish. Not silence obviously but any screaming or shouting and they're inside. That's what used to happen on our street anyway.

Its nice for kids to play out and seems a shame to being them in early.