To think 7.30 is late enough?

[EssieTregowan]

It's all kicking off in my street.

There's a terrace of five houses, all families with kids of varying ages, and a small block of flats next to it which is mainly couples. The rest of the estate is detached houses.

All the terrace kids play out the front. And now the evenings are lighter lots of them don't come in until 9pm or later. And they are LOUD. Bikes, water pistols, balls, shrieking etc.

One of the mums has complained on our estate FB page and asked nicely that the kids are brought in at 7.30 as she is struggling with hers at bedtime when they can hear the others playing out. The flats residents are backing her up and the other mums are getting shirty and defensive. Insults are flying.

I'm staying out of it (I live down the other end and although I can hear them it doesn't disturb my kids) but I think that actually she's quite right and it's really antisocial.

The loud kids mum's are now saying if it's a problem they should complain to the HA. It's now come to light that they all had a letter last summer from the HA saying that if it didn't improve they'd enforce a curfew.

I'm sort of watching from the sidelines with my jaw open. My kids don't play out as we have a big garden, but I get them indoors by 7.30 if they are being loud as our neighbours at the back have younger children.

It's just common courtesy, isn't it? I'm a bit surprised tbh as they're usually all very neighbourly.

Anyway, what do you all think? How late is too late to be out playing loudly on a school night?

I think 9 would be fine if the kids were respectful. We played out until dark but were always supervised and never allowed to be a nuisance (well we were never allowed to be a nuisance full stop!). I'm definitely of the opinion that no one should be anti-social and no one should affect their neighbour's quality of life. My kids are allowed to play out as long as they aren't irritating anyone else, if they do they come in. It's just respectful. We all expect a bit of noise but when it goes past an acceptable level it's bloody irritating! Kind of glad the kids can't really play out the front where I live tbh

They are seriously loud. As I said, I can hear them and we have another row of houses between us.

The lady who is asking for quiet actually has four kids, from 3-15. She just doesn't let them run screaming down the road in the evenings. She has no objection to them playing, it's the noise, and the fact they are mostly unsupervised.

I think 9 is fair enough on Summer nights. But I do think it's the absolute latest kids should be out playing. It simply isn't fair on neighbours, particularly those who live beside a communal green or playground, to have children still out screaming and kicking footballs around until ten or eleven at night.

'Move to a cottage in a field with no houses for a mile if it's that bad. Then again, she would probably bitch about the fucking cows moo-ing in the next field! hmm'

I was about to say that. We live in a rural area. Agriculture is so anti-social, especially in Summer!

Let them be kids! You can never win. I've realised this now I have my own

That being said, the last time I asked a child to stop screaming and swinging out of tree branch directly outside my house at 10 o'clock I was ignored twice and on the third occasion asked her where she lived so I could speak to her parents.
Cue indignant father furious that I had 'upset' his daughter by becoming so 'confrontational'.

So some parents maybe do need an official curfew to make them see sense.

There are precious few evenings in the year when it is both light enough and warm and dry enough for kids to play out late. Mine don't get to because I am a mean and horrible mother if I don't start trying to impose calm from.about 7.30pm onwards bedtime will be a fraught nightmare, but I don't get fussed about the noise from others unless it goes on past about 9pm.

I think 7.30 is early is summer. I imagine the housing association have a clause in their tenancies about nuisance and that is how they would enforce a curfew e.g. if they continue to get complaints about noise nuisance caused by your family you could lose your tenancy. I can't think of any other way they could enforce it.

Pathetic. 7.30 is very early in the summer. At least they're in the street so their parents can keep an eye out.

I have friends who live in a road terrorised by the children of a few families on that street - out til very late, screaming, yelling, kicking footballs against their windows, shouting out abuse if they see you in the street and cars get keyed every so often. The kids and the parents both will be scarily aggressive at any mention of maybe some of this not happening.

Its not the time kids are out, its the noise they are allowed to make by parents who send them out for hours unsupervised because they dont want to deal with the noise in the house. After all, if the kids were out quietly, not everyone would be constantly reminded how late they were out, they wouldnt know!

It simply isn't fair on neighbours, particularly those who live beside a communal green or playground, to have children still out screaming and kicking footballs around until ten or eleven at night.

if you decide to live near a green, expect noise.

we have some serial moaners on our estate too. One fellow came to me complaining about my daughters, and they were completely ridiculous complaints. He said he likes to relax in the garden in the evening and can't stand the sounds they make, which are relatively quiet for playing (one example were the cartwheels. i didn't know cartwheels were loud.). The guy is retired, so I don't understand what he does in the day he needs to wind down from.

I think there are some people out there who have so little to do that complaining is a form of entertainment. Others who think that they have the right to watch tele with the windows open in complete silence.

Close the windows or go inside. The outside space is shared.

I imagine the housing association have a clause in their tenancies about nuisance and that is how they would enforce a curfew

I would think this is a grey area. On our councils webpage they are very clear on what kind of noise they will consider dealing with. The noise has to be persistent and unreasonable. I can imagine some children are unreasonable, but many aren't. it's the people who want silence that are being unreasonable.

HA's are generally very tolerant of children's noise. I lived in a small block of flats and the downstairs neighbour complained about a girl's toddler running up and down her flat...the HA said the sound of children playing or babies crying was not considered a nuisance but a normal part of life.

Hmm... Personally I think playing out until 9 is fine on the summer. Playing out is a really special thing. The kids down our street play out until that kind of time but they're not especially noisy. My kids are younger (3 and 5) so I always hang about in the front yard and supervise and make them come in earlier to bed - when they moan about it I just tell them different families have different rules. But I do appreciate its not easy.

Playing out is a really special thing.

it is getting increasingly more difficult to get kids into healthy lifestyles, especially with the ubiquity of screens. I am a parent guilty of kicking my children out of the house, but that's mainly to get them to do something active and off their screens. I am often out with them, so it isn't a way to have "me time".

I think the 7:30 curfew woman is the anti-social one here actually.

7.30 is way too early. 9pm sounds reasonable to me. If you live in an area with family homes, you have to expect families to live in them. Also it is hard enough to get kids out to play these days without curtailing it any further. New estates may set out lists of rules but in reality everyone in the neighbourhood usually find some sort of common ground and collectively choose to enforce the things that are a problem and ignore the petty rules that inconvenience everyone.

@expatinscotland

I was about to say that. We live in a rural area. Agriculture is so anti-social, especially in summer

LOL

Too right. We live in a village that is quite rural, and in the spring/early summer the farmers are ploughing the fields til 10.30pm some nights! You can hear the distant hum of farm machinery and tractors from most of the homes in the village. You will get 4 weeks in a row with nothing, then you will get 3-4 weeks in a row of agricultural machinery noise. (Not loud, and you can't hear it with your doors and windows closed, but you can hear it in the distance when you are in the garden...)

You can also hear sheep bahh-ing and cows mooing too (about a 10 minutes walk away from our house they all are.) I love the 'farm sounds.' Especially the cute little noise the tiny little lambs make.

The miserable fuckers I was on about in my last post (who live in a cul de sac half a mile out of the outskirts of the village,) moan about the 'farm noise' too. Yet they moved out into a rural, agricultural area. Thick cunts.

notknownatthisaddress, people like you seem to have very little insight into when kids have crossed the line from having fun (which of course no one expects them to do in silence), to being anti social. And there is a line.

What is 'excessive noise' to one is kids having fun to another.

Kids 'having fun' doesn't excuse excessive noise, this is how we're raising a generation of entitled children. It's a compromise, just because they are children doesn't give them the right to be as loud as they please because they're young.

Adults are entitled to live wherever they please, that includes big houses in a cul-de-sac. You can't possibly judge how noisy these children in the op are without living there yourself, the fact there are multiple complaints suggests there actually is an issue, rather than one grumpy neighbour. Though I'd suppose you'd be the parent being 'precious' over their darling children getting away with anything rather than trying to find a compromise. It takes all sorts to make a community, no one takes precedence, everyone should be able to enjoy their evenings without disturbing others.

I use to live somewhere similar. Kids playing out from sunrise to sunset, no adult supervision, screaming, shouting constantly - it was awful.

They played in what was essentially a car park, so completely unsuitable for young children to be playing in as they didn't seem to understand the danger of moving vehicles and would often run out in front or behind moving cars.

There was also issues with property being damaged, cars being scratched and dented by bikes and scooters, gardens being trampled, etc.

In the end the HA got involved and a letter was sent to everyone saying children were not allowed to play in the car park as it was dangerous and disturbing people living nearby. Of course, the parents decided that rules didn't apply to them and still let them play out there. The HA then made personal visits to the parents who still allowed their children to play outside, and those who still continued got given warnings that they were causing a nuisance and not adhering to their tenancy agreement, etc.

The parents involved were the sort who just chucked their kids outside all day long and inflicted their noise on everyone else and clearly didn't care about the safety of their children and couldn't be arsed to take them the 150 metres to a huge playing field and park!!

7.30 in the summer is far too early. Ffs how often is it warm and light enough for kids to play out in the U.K? She can have her way for 10 months of the year.

Miserable cow

It's the summer time. I know this makes bedtime hard for very little ones but I would say 9.00 is more like it.

Silage behind me til gone 11 last night. I fell asleep to the noise of the tractor.

Kids in my estate all run out til 10. It's not even dark then.

Half seven woman is out of order.

Also why aren't people just talking to each other instead of starting FB wars ? I know that's naive btw.

And there is a line.

of course.

this is how we're raising a generation of entitled children

no generation is as entitled as the current 55+.

Adults are entitled to live wherever they please, that includes big houses in a cul-de-sac. You can't possibly judge how noisy these children in the op are without living there yourself, the fact there are multiple complaints suggests there actually is an issue, rather than one grumpy neighbour.

Adults are not entitled to live anywhere they please and expect no noise. And complaints, even multiple ones, are absolutely no indication of a problem. There are about 40 flats and 10 houses that abut the communal playground area (yes, there is a fecking playground there. It was designed for kids to play in) and there are complaints from only about 2-4 flats.

The same person I mentioned above complained about a party that MY neighbours held (he is 4 houses up from this house, I am the adjacent house). It was a little loud, and a little late, but I brushed it off as a one off. He complained to the estate office.

Most people are entirely reasonable. On the other side of me and next to them are two houses of retirees. They have never once complained about the noise of my children or any other children. It's just the guy that live 5 houses away, and a women across the way.

I am not saying children can't make an unreasonable amount of noise. of course they can, and I have asked my kids to tone it down before too. But I have first hand experience that complaints aren't an indication of a real problem.