We had an au pair last year who was brilliant and would babysit for neighbours regularly. One neighbour used her a lot and had her doing regular childcare on the days we didn't need her. It got a bit awkward after a while as neighbour would ask au pair to mind her child when au pair was looking after mine (usually after school, could au pair pick up hers too and take her child to play ground and return her home at tea time). Sometimes she offered to pay her and sometimes not. It then got to the stage where au pair was collecting neighbour's child from school every day. I did step in at this point and tried to put a stop to it, but neighbour had a lot of "emergencies" and au pair really struggled to say no.
I am now back at work after dc3 and we have hired a nanny. Nanny's second day was yesterday. I came home from work a bit early so called nanny to find out where they were and met them in the park. Nanny had neighbours child with her. Nanny said neighbour had asked her to watch her child as she had to pop to the shops for 5 mins. That was 45 mins ago. Neighbour then turned up with a takeaway coffee and a couple of bags of shopping.
I am pissed off. Nanny is a lot more expensive than au pair and should be watching my three dc in the park, not someone else's dc. AIBU?!?
But... I can also see neighbour's point of view - they were in the park anyway. She doesn't have anyone to help with childcare. She is trying to set up her own business. Women should help other women etc.
I have told nanny that she should say no if asked again. But I am aware of how hard it is to say no to neighbour. So I think I need to speak to neighbour. But what do I say?!? I won't see her today as I am at work but I will tomorrow. Should I text today instead?
She took my nanny's number as she left the playground and I assume she plans on using her for babysitting.
My dc are 5, 3 and 1. Her dc is 5 and she also has a 13 year old.