To think you should help tidy up after playgroup?

[GreenShorts]

I mean the sort that churches run with volunteers for a pretty nominal cost. At the end of my local one every week the same people sit on their backside whilst everyone else pitches in.

This obviously excludes anyone who might find this difficult (we sometimes have grandparents and I completely understand they may find it difficult). But the people who have happily been running around after their children until tidy up time comes around. Am I unreasonable to think they should get up and help?

My mum used to run a church playgroup when I was a child. I don't honestly remember the mums helping to clear up but then again they didn't stay with the kids either. They dropped them off and picked them up later on. My mum and the other women running the group used to tidy everything away, with me "helping" when I was there.

Playgroups where you drop the kids off are different though - it's usually paid and the parents have to do volunteer sessions as a condition of their children going. And they will cost a lot more than £2!

I run a toddler group.
We have parents with babies who leave before the tidy up time (give it 3 years I know they'll be running the group)
We have a couple of families who are obviously struggling at the moment, they leave, but I'm just glad we can help them a bit.
We have many who help tidy up.
Then we have a group with a single 3/4 year old each. Who have been coming to toddlers for years, (who are actually my friendship group in non-toddler life) who start to help but always get distracted in conversation. It amuses (and frustrates me) every week. They know how this works. They know I'm struggling to run things. If I pointed it out they would think they help loads. I often ask them to do things. (The job will get half done!)

I used to go to a different toddler group. I always had to leave 10 mins before tidy-up time because my kids were at a different school to everyone else's.
I did more than my turn opening up and always helped with snacks/washing-up etc.

My kids do loads of activities including scouting and guiding. I'm one of those parents who drops kids and runs and never volunteers. I can't take any more on right now.

I think with the toddler groups, it's not so much the people who leave every week who are the problem UNLESS that means there is not enough help to run it.
It's the people who sit chatting whilst the work goes on around them.

Not been to toddler group for a few years now, but went to several. It was always a case of "tidy up time" where we all put the toys back in the boxes etc.
Then sit in circle and sing songs such as "Wind The Bobbin Up" and "The Wheels On The Bus."
Ah, memories

IWillCrushYouLikeABug that's not the same because a three year old has a lot more understanding and a newborn doesn't move!

You picked a very specific time there didn't you 😉 But actually newborn in a sling and a 2,3 year old isn't as easy as you might think. If you're expecting a just turned three year old to be very well behaved you've got an steep learning curve ahead!

There's a lot of "but my situation..." And defensiveness on this thread.

Nobody is saying everyone should be involved in mass pack away of everything. Nobody is saying non volunteers should be cleaning everything up. Nobody is forcing people to volunteer. Nobody is suggesting that everyone who attends should be stacking chairs, doing the cups, folding tables etc.

People are saying that it's common courtesy to put a couple of toys away your child has been playing with. That's it.
And yes, it is rude when tidy the toys time comes round to sit around carrying on your chatter as others tidy up after your child.

You can keep chatting and pick a toy up. The way some people are carrying on its like picking up a doll is some kind of forced labour.

If there's a reason why and you don't repeatedly take the piss, then fine. People are reasonable.

Surely with most things in life 'don't take the piss' covers many situations.

Just to clarify when I say my new toddlers would melt down during the transion to tidying/song time I mean autistic melt downs-not tantrums. So head butting the floor, biting their arms, screaming so loud it upset other children. They weren't diagnosed at that point but my eldest was and they all are now. I did more than my fair share of inadvertently watching everyone's children during the group though.

voidoid So you aren't a piss taker.

To me the thread is clear, piss takers and not piss takers.
Piss takers don't do anything other than sit about and expect everyone else to do everything from making tea, collecting cups, watching their kids, pick up toys etc. They have a certain aura about them.

I know I'm not. But pp is demanding that kids having meltdowns get trained out of it and I'm explaining there's a difference between a toddler tantrum and a disability related meltdown. While my kids will hopefully learn coping skills in time I can't train them out of having a disability.

I'm also lucky enough I knew what was going on because of my eldest's diagnosis (and my own relates ones) and plenty of parents of toddlers who repeatedly have overwhelmed melt downs at transion times and/or the music may have underlying send issues not yet identified. It's easy to claim kids will just have to get used to it or that the parent will just have to teach them, not as easy to live with kids who will allways have difficulties with these issues.

I don't doubt there are piss takers, there was allways a group of child minders who ignored there charges and kettle them hog the toys everyone else's kid wanted a turn off, but it is definately flippant to claim all toddlers will just have to learn as if they all come from the same mold.