£10 too small a gift for wedding

[poggybum]

I've changed my username in fear of being recognised I wonder what people's opinions are on only putting £10cash in a card for a relative I can't stand and doesn't currently talk to me but I have to go to the wedding (long story) DH & I are on a super tight budget right now and barely break even at the end of the month right now. The bride and groom have asked for cash and I know I'll get an aggressive call from my mum because the bridezilla is obsessed with money and will likely complain to her. I feel embarrassed because I know the bride will tell everyone but I don't want to take money out of savings for her. AIBU to stick to my guns on this one?

Just send a card and don't go

If you don't like them & aren't talking, it sounds like £10 too much

Is it a day do or evening do? Day do I would say 20 atleast or get a bottle of nice wine. If it's the evening then £10

Is she your sister? Otherwise I can't see why you'd have to go to the wedding of someone who isn't speaking to you.

I think £10 will be more of a statement than just going with a card.

Yeah £10 is pretty tight. £25? maybe a voucher for something she'd hate?

And to add yes... she is my sister. And she's a self absorbed dick who is obsessed with money.

If you are not talking to the bride and can't stand them do not go. Send a card, without they money if you want appease family.

Have you posted about her previously? Its ringing some bells...
£10 is fine. Money is tight and she wants cash not a present but you still only have so much money

Long story or not. I would not send any money to people that were not speaking to me. That's ridiculous. If they aren't talking to you what does it matter what they think of you.

Don't give anything & when asked feign surprise and claim you put £200 in a card which must have been lost / stolen.

I really don't want to even go. The family is obsessed with keeping up appearances and I'm going to have to stand there and smile through gritted teeth in the wedding pics, I feel so fake going. She's treated me horrendously over the last couple of years.

Don't go if you don't like them

Gifts should never be expected, and ty should only give what you can afford. My only question would be - what did she get you for your wedding? I would struggle to give a small gift to someone who had been generous to me. Not that you give to receive, but I wouldn't feel comfortable in myself taking a nice gift and not reciprocating when it was their turn.

I'd just give her a card and keep the tenner.

I couldn't give a tenner. I would prefer not to go and I would give something. You have savings you said. I think I would give something 100 ish but you have to decide

I wouldnt give her a penny and send a card saying have a nice day and stay at home

I wouldn't give her any money but if you feel you should give something I'd get a bottle of prosecco instead

Send a nice card with no money and don't go if you don't want to. If you do decide to go, same card, still no money.

Don't go!

I'd send a card saying have a lovely day - as you're not speaking to me I assume you'll have a nicer day without me. I wouldn't go.

Empty card. Feign ignorance when your mum mentions it.

@tigerdog that's why I'm questioning everything because they gave us £50 (years ago when we were getting on ok) but they got engaged in Dec 16 before the relationship with sister deteriorated and I got them a nice wedding related engagement present which cost £40 and they didn't get anything for us when we got engaged. It's a tricky one!

Sounds like you'll piss her off whatever you do so just give her a card and keep the £10.

I'd send just a card and stay at home.