We had au pairs for a few years, who covered the mornings (getting DD up and out to school daily), and collected her from afterschool club an hour earlier twice a week as well as about 2-3 hours of cleaning across the week.
Then, we got a minder to come in for the 1 hour in the mornings and continued the afterschool club to finish time every day. As DD got into y5, and she was starting to be allowed to walk to the shops alone, we started letting her walk/cycle home from school alone 15 minutes before we were due in. Due to other things changing, she now gets collected from an afterschool club at 6 twice a week, and comes home herself once afterschool activities in school finish twice a week (3.45pm and 3.30pm), and a DAunt collects her from the final afterschool activity in another school once a week at 4pm and drops her here at 6ish. Next year, DD is adamant (and we're ok with it) that she will not do afterschool club - but she WILL do an activity every afternoon until at least 3.30.
We are very very organized, and have been since DD arrived. Bags packed and lunches made the night before. (Well, DD's lunches are agreed but the oven goes on when we wake as she takes hot food in a flask). Activities are in the diary and bags are packed ahead of time for those. We keep on top of washing and drying laundry all week, but fold it once a week while watching a movie on Saturday evening, and DH irons on Sunday while I make dinner - which means anyone can root for clean clothes in the basket if more urgent. We also have quite well filled wardrobes to try and prevent last minute panics over needing clean clothes. We have a cleaner almost all the time - we've tried without and it's miserable, but we currently have a cleaning service come once a fortnight to clean thoroughly, and we can then keep on top of it the rest of the time. He is better at cleaning bathrooms, while I am better at making sure the bins go out.
I internet shop for food as often as actually going to a supermarket. I will make use of the M&S near my office for dinners some nights, and we have times when we have takeaway midweek. I also try though to keep dinners, and things to easily make dinners, in the cupboards, fridge and freezer so that while I have a general plan for the week, I can adapt if time goes against us for some reason. So I will batch cook on occasion and put a few lasagnas or curries or shepherd's pies or whatever in the freezer in 1 person and family portion sizes, and things like stock, breadcrumbs, marinaded meat, plain HM tomato sauces, chopped herbs etc that I've done, or prawns, chopped chicken, peas etc to throw together dinners in a hurry. While I do dinners of meat, potatoes and veg sometimes, I peel the potatoes and prep the veg the night before to just turn on when I get in - or I will have a lasagna in the oven with the timer set to turn it on and off again ready for our arrival home. I have a range of fast dinners to cook. I keep some good jars of sauce for when I am shorter on time, and leave cooking from scratch for slightly more relaxed days - although I nearly always still add veg as well as meat to those sauces.
DH does plenty - he is better on keeping the laundry system going than me and took over ironing completely when DD was born (we'd each done our own before that). Whoever cooks is not on washup is the general rule - so the cook generally does homework help after dinner if the other person has not been there to do it before dinner (while the cook cooks). He will head out to do the shopping and, while it might be different to my plans, it will always work fine for the week. We do have a list on the fridge to mark up anything we need including anything that has run out, and anything people want as well (like treats for a last day of an activity in school next week).
We have a diary on the counter for everyone to see and fill in to avoid clashes - includes work travel, DD (and finally our) activities, social events and family travel plans (including any visitors to us).
DD has a lot of activity outside of the house, I am a Cub scout leader and on a committee associated with school, I am learning to sail and DH has learned to scuba dive in recent years. Both DH and I (DH more than me at present) do a fair amount of travel for work, and sometimes catch up on work stuff at night at home. But we still make time for gardening, meeting friends, travelling to wider family, etc. I have less crafting time than I'd like just now, but I do knit, sew and make cards on occasion still.
You have to set up systems to manage, and work as a team. But it is perfectly possible to do. IF you work as a team...