To tell the mum's at nursery to fuck off

[Queenofthestress]

Every single day during drop off I get the dirtiest looks because I play with DC1 during the wait for the doors to open, half the time it's not even playing, it's catching him before he shoots out the door and is off before I can even turn dc2's pushchair around to run after him.
They know he's SN as they're in the same group and have heard me and his teacher talking about appointments or its come up in conversation yet I'm still getting dirty looks as if to say how dare you play with your child

Would it be unreasonable to tell them to bugger off with their shitty looks?

Yes unreasonable. Dazzling smile them to death instead.

Why would anyone give you dirty looks for playing with your child? Maybe it's the morning and they are just tired/grumpy. I wouldn't say anything

Someone is looking at you and you want to tell them to fuck off?!
What on earth are you doing that makes you think they are shooting you filthy looks?

I mean this in the nicest possible way but are you sure they're giving you 'dirty looks'? What does that even mean? I have never come across anyone who would give the tiniest toss about a mother entertaining her own child in a nursery playground or wherever. I might well look stressed or distracted myself but that's my default morning face and nothing to do with anyone else!

Maybe they suffer from resting bitch face

I arrive later as my dd has Sen and hates waiting. I also feel judged as she has my old iPhone to watch videos on whilst we wait as she can't stay still like most four year olds.

It's the afternoon drop off, and I'm literally either playing peekaboo with him or pointing out what the letters on the wall say, occasionally I have to catch him if he tries to do a runner,
when they're full on staring and scowling it's hard to think it's not a dirty look, generally this is whilst their own dc is clinging to their leg jabbering away at them

Well I say dirty look but I mean scowling at me

Staring doesn't equal a dirty look?
You are behaving differently to them and they look. I can't see the problem.

Why would they object to you playing?

Try to take no notice.
You're not wearing your own judgy face at drop off btw, are you?

Why do you think they are scowling at you? Are you ok?

I'm not trying to be mean OP but it sounds a bit like you might be overly sensitive about this. Are you ok generally?

What you're doing sounds totally normal. I'm not sure why you think you might get dirty looks for it. Your description of their kids is a touch rude though.

He can get a bit loud, we wait in a small corridor type room, I do tell him to use his indoor voice so looking back it could be that
They're not just staring, they're full on scowling at me

He can get a bit loud, we wait in a small corridor type room,

Well there you go then, you have a reason why they might be glaring at you. If you let your child "get loud" in an enclosed, indoor space, on a daily basis then they are going to glare, especially if ti seems you are encouraging it.

I really, really doubt mothers are giving you the stink eye for playing with your child while you wait for nursery to open.

Why on earth would they even care what you are doing with your child?? They probably are just glancing over. And you think all the mums are conspiring together to give you 'dirty looks?'
Along with your aggressive reaction to wanting to swear them, I think it's just all in your head.

So a whole group of mums -not just one or two- spend the whole time before the doors open staring and scowling at you? Every day?

It sounds unlikely TBH.

Unless you are coming across as a 'loud parent' (oh look timmy! We know those numbers in mandarin, don't we! Timmy! It's the letter Q! Q for quinoa and quiescent. Tell everyone what quiescent means now Timmy...), they really probably aren't staring at you.

I'm usually all kinds of pissed off in the morning, and couldn't give the tiniest fuck what other parents are up to.

This seems really strange... why would anyone scowl at someone for playing with their child?? Are you sure there isn't something else going in?
Everyone talks to/plays with their children at DD's pre school drop off. I've never noticed any scowls!

Maybe they think you're 'performance parenting' and they find it annoying.

In all honestly, drop off and pick up are probably one of the hardest parts of my day, hell just getting him to school unless it's in a pushchair is bloody awful, he bolts when off reins but won't walk on them, I've had to put him back in a pushchair to keep him safe as he's got no sense of danger and i hate it, it took me a year to get him walking using physio, he'd scream through doing the exercises so looking at it I'm definitely being oversensitive
Stressed, exhausted and oversensitive sounds about right

I'm still getting dirty looks as if to say how dare you play with your child

I don't get it. SN or not, I just can't imagine anyone taking offence to someone playing with their child.

I have noticed that bitchy resting face gets more common among women waiting for kids or dropping them off. I think its because they're busy and stressed and not really thinking about anyone else except their child.

I would honestly try and not assume they are judging you. They may well be trying not to look as they know it's more difficult for you and don't want to make you feel under pressure.

This is coming from someone with a dc in a sn school who occasionally comes with me to pick up his brothers from their ms school and swears his head off, while trying to run into the school. Literally no one meets my eye or even shows they can tell we're there. I have always assumed they are trying to be kind.