To not make his sandwiches?

[DeleteOrDecay]

Dp has been feeling rubbish at work lately. It's because instead of taking some proper food in he takes a couple of breakfast bars to see him through his shift but he is on his feet a lot so this obviously isn't substantial enough.

I suggested he should maybe make himself a sandwich or something to take with him. His response was that he can't be bothered it takes five minutes to knock up a wrap or sandwich. He asked me if I could make them for him but I refused on the basis that he is more than capable of making his own sandwich for work and that I have enough on my plate with 2 young dc, the majority of the housework and cooking and my own myriad of MH issues.

I am a sahm, but I don't see why I should be expected to make him sandwiches when he has ample time either before or after work to make one himself. I'm his partner, not his mother. Aibu?

I'm still reeling that someone's husband spends £7 on a Waitrose sandwich.

No i certainly wouldn't make dh sandwiches. He is an adult who can make his own lunch. I also wouldn't expect him to sort my packed lunch out!

While I am bit of a feminist about this sort of thing, he is working and obviously quite stressed and you are not so you are being a bit uncaring. As you said, it only takes 5 mins. I know he is being a bit crap but maybe he will do it for you one day.

Sorry I skipped over the part which said you were depressed and anxious. I should have read whole thread.

carriecakes80 I love a milky coffee

He sounds depressed to me, is he having problems at work that he hasn't told you about?

He sounds depressed to me, is he having problems at work that he hasn't told you about?

Yes he has the problem that he can't pull his backside off the sofa for 5 mins to make a sandwich whilst the OP is wrangling kids, housework and MH issues.
Or did you miss the part where the OP says he eats food other than biscuits if its there waiting for him in the fridge?

Ffs - the "it depends how much you love him" bullshit. A grown man can make his own bloody sandwiches. What a joke you are not being unreasonable at all. He's acting like a man child

Why do people keep saying that he is the person who is working?! The OP works in the home, ffs

My phone seems to be playing up and has taken me back to the 1950s. If you love him you'd make his packed lunch?! If the cooking duties are yours you should make the sandwich?! OP works within the home, she isn't an employee of his every whim. If he can't be bothered, then why should OP?

Not sure where people are getting the idea he is stressed (and I'm not?). Not saying he is or isn't, but I can't really see anything in my posts that have indicated it either way.

If this was me, I would, because sometimes everyone needs looking after especially your family, and it will be your turn another time. But if you can't do it kindly don't

Not sure where people are getting the idea he is stressed (and I'm not?). Not saying he is or isn't, but I can't really see anything in my posts that have indicated it either way.

I think you both are but that's just reading between the lines

Exactly what LadyintheRadiator says on first page:

'No, you don't have to be someone's mum, but if you don't infantilise yourself in the first place that's not an issue - feeling 'crap' because you're too pathetic to put something in between two slices of bread is disgustingly unattractive.

Huge difference between making someone lunch as a favour and doing it because they're a feeble manchild.'

Spot on

Just make the man a sandwich

"poster Lovelymess Fri 05-May-17 20:43:32
Just make the man a sandwich hmm"

or just not make the man a sandwich?

bibbity (haven't seen you around for a while) - don't be unkind, Lovely was just being a lovely person who REALLY knows how to treat a man.

Yup. Behind every successful man is a good dutiful woman, doncha know??

I'd make it. I think a sandwich tastes better when someone else makes it for you...

Just make the man a sandwich

Totally agree, when you're snowed under with caring for two young pre schoolers and mental health issues and your man can't even be arsed making a sandwich for himself, you struggle on girl, you power through and you get that sandwich made. Off you trot now. Don't you know it's your duty?

Ffs. 😂😂😂

'Not sure where people are getting the idea he is stressed (and I'm not?). Not saying he is or isn't, but I can't really see anything in my posts that have indicated it either way.'

Don't worry, Delay, someone will soon be along to tell you that he's autistic in addition to depressed. These two are excuses for all manner of twat behaviour, doncha know?

I would if I loved him - I would if i didn't love him but then I'd secretly spit in it.

Wouldn't matter whether I loved him or not, I still wouldn't make it. Because I couldn't be arsed either.

Life is too short to spend making other people's sandwiches (see also: doing their ironing, packing their suitcases and/or buying their pants). I can think of a lot of things I'd rather do instead, starting with reading a good book with a glass of wine.

I'm torn.
If it were my hubby, he'd make his own.
But I'd buy him something awesome to go in it.
If he's capable, he needs to make his own, do not mother him. I had a boyfriend once who had never boiled the kettle!
I'm disabled so struggle to do many things, but eff me, unless he's disabled too, get him cool stuff to put in his sarnies and let him make his own. (I do the online shop)

If the lack of decent food means he is exhausted and grumpy by the time he gets home id make him his sandwich just not to have him drip through the door like he was dying! Saves you the grief of dealing with the man child's im so hard done by attitude