To think breastfeeding has made no difference to my dd and is massively overrated in terms of benefits?

[Placeanditspatrons]

I've nearly driven myself to a breakdown feeding my dd. She is 16 months now and I'm still feeding. She has been ill more times and worse than my formula fed from four months son. She does not recover any faster and she catches anything I get and gets it worse, despite supppsedly the antibodies passing to her and either preventing or reducing the severity of the illness.

I know it's anecdotal and the studies say overall bf babies are healthier but how much healthier? I mean I we talking one less cold? One less ear injection? Statistically? Many of my friends have said similar. Again anecdotal but I can't help wondering - after the colostrum which is more important I guess - does it really make any noticeable difference?

I'm starting to think it's over rated too after being left with a skin tag on my nipple after 18 months of breastfeeding

So annoying

You're not the only one who thinks it's overrated OP! Hope you're feeling better soon!

I bfed both of mine for a year & one has always picked up stuff more easily that the other.

Op, stop if you want to.

Is there much benefit when they are mostly on solids?

Op..well done ,you've given your dd an amazing start.be proud of your achievement..I've no advice,other than a well done...I didn't produce a drop of milk for any of my 4 kids..they all had weeks/days of screaming for food while I assumed I was feeding them..breast is best leaflets all over,the guilt at not producing milk 😢.worrying it will effect bonding..no midwife ever said,don't worry you did your best ,they all belived formula was second best..every time I was pregnant I was determined to breast feed,every time my boobs let me down.anyway..point I'm coming to,sorry it's long winded,mine all had formula and they are all ok🙂

That's really unprofessional of the HV. It's also complete bollocks.

Oh gosh I totally agree with you OP. The the benefits are absolute tosh. You genuinely cannot tell which baby is breastfed and which bottle at any stage of life

I suspect that in many cases the effect breastfeeding has on a Mother's mental health is significantly exacerbated by other issues, like unsupportive partners/family, undiagnosed or improperly treated PND, poverty, ill health of mother/child, undiagnosed tongue tie and no breastfeeding support. But it's easier to suggest a bottle than look to the root causes, especially since society is still sadly fairly anti-woman and anti-mother.

Hv sounds nuts.
I did forget my favourite line which I keep on spouting.
Even when bfing is 'easy' it's still hard work.

Excuse me, OP, if I am unsympathetic, but I don't actually understand why you are suffering so much breastfeeding. I found breastfeeding went well with my extremely lazy nature. Surely formula feeding is a lot more of a faff.

And why would you continue to breastfeed at this stage if you hate it so much and don't think it is helping your baby?

Are we in a situation where it is impossible for HCPs to discuss feeding at all without people feeling put under pressure?

I think we probably are. And probably because of the nature of the NHS, to be honest. It's a universal service, whose remit is public health, so it almost has to have a simple, "one size fits all" approach to some things. Breast feeding is one example of this. The approach is "breast is best" and health visitors and midwives are obliged to stick to that script. So there often can't be a "discussion" in real terms.

Oh I just looked and you are expressing. No wonder it is exhausting. I would just stop now, if I were you.

It always amuses to think of scientists who've found that breastfeeding is best for babies will come on to mumsnet and say "Oh shit! Susan from Solihull breastfed her baby who now has asthma but Helen from Hove formula fed her son who's now a perfectly healthy baby! My research means fuck all. I must keep this secret!"

My DD was BF til she was 3 (didn't plan on it being that long it just kind of happened that way). She has eczema and asthma. Nowhere will you find research that's says BF prevents eczema and asthma. However what research does show is that breastfeeding can reduce the severity of eczema and asthma. My DD suffers enough with it, so I'm pleased that it's not potentially worse than it is now because I BF for so long.

Or it's possible that it made no difference. I'll never know, and until someone clones a baby, feeds the original formula and the clone breastmilk, we will never know how BF v FF truly affects any one human. But based on current science I'm happy that my decision could have made her life a bit easier though. Formula is a fairly recent invention and I find it quite strange that people suddenly question the effectiveness of something that allowed humans to thrive for thousands of years and pretty much kept the human race going.

I only ever felt pressure to stop BFing. I felt it regularly from other mothers who seemed to find it disgusting that I was BFing after about 3 months.

I was even told by a paediatrician that there were no benefits to BFing my 8mo. He was cross that I dismissed him and carried on. There may not have been any huge benefit over formula at that age but I can't see how that means I should stop. She was happy, I was happy, it was far cheaper and much more convenient and there would be no benefit to forcing a move to formula.

There are benefits to BFing. There are benefits to having a mother who isn't unhappy. You have to make the decision you think is right for you and your baby.

I think it's good that women are encouraged to BF by health professionals because it counteracts the pressure not to by other members of society and, in general, it would be better for BFing to become more and more normal.

There will be times when people feel under pressure both ways and make decisions they didn't really want to make. You felt under pressure to BF. Others feel under pressure to stop.

BFing your DD could have saved her life and you would never know. Then again, maybe it didn't change a thing. Who knows?

OP, you can't win. I fed ds1 to 2, ds2 to 2.5 and ds3 is almost 2.5 and still having a pre-bed feed. I get told off for it by family, friends, colleagues and hcps. Friends who formula fed or weaned early get shit for that. And most maddening of all, people say "just stop" when I explain I'd love not to feed him any more. Yes. It's that fucking easy. Why on earth didn't I think of "just stopping"?

I've also been the (first time) mum who the HV had taking DS to be weighed every week "because he wasn't on his line". It was probably because he didn't sit still as he still had bags of energy. But the HV managed to undermine my confidence as a new mother, and even though I'm a HCP, and should have known better, I wasn't able to be be objective enough to see that she was wrong,

I think it is easy to lose your objectivity when you are vulnerable and depressed, and so lots of Mums don't challenge professionals who are being over zealous. IMHO One of the very great strengths of Mumsnet, is that when people are at the end of their tether, other posters will give them a different perspective.

For those saying that breastfeeding studies are only carried out in countries which lack clean water etc there are so many studies based solely on developed countries which find the same thing - breastfeeding is superior to formul feeding. The difference in a country like the uk is that these health benefits can be negated somewhat by our access to good healthcare but the bottom line is that breastfeeding is better. If there was the slightest chance this was not the case then the formula companies would jump on this and pay for their own studies to show they was minimal difference as this would boost their profits, instead they strive to make their milk as close to breastmilk as possible well aside from the multiple antibodies and lack of crap

I think the benecits of bf statistics are more of a worldwide thing, as in, many countries have no clean water, no fridges, no kettles, no sterilisers so bf is a much healthier option. In the UK it probably not that much of a difference. But well done for keeping on, I tgink you should stop now for you mental health. Although if you carry on til she's 2 there will be benefits for your body too, anti-cancer and stuff. X x

Atenco
surely formula feeding is a lot more faff
To you maybe. I found formula feeding incredibly easy and convenient compared to breastfeeding. I suspect many other mothers do too.

What your MW said was nonsense!

There's a very good chapter on this in Science of Mum by Alice Callahan. She's a scientist who has analysed all the studies to sort out the good quality research studies from the not so good quality ones. Studies on bf benefits need to control properly for things like parental wealth, education level etc (as bf-ing mothers are more like to be better off and better educated, so any benefits could be done to this and other things related to this rather than the bf).

If I remember correctly, her conclusion was that bf has two statistically significant benefits (over the population at large of course) - namely a lower risk of respiratory tract infections and a lower risk of SIDS. Other claimed benefits like lower risk of obesity, higher IQ, etc do not have any good evidence. But would recommend you read the chapter in the book.

Of course those two benefits make breastfeeding desirable if everything else is all equal, but if breastfeeding is very difficult and results in maternal unhappiness or genuinely slow weight gain for baby then there are other risks (like PND, etc) which greatly outweigh the benefits of bf so much better to switch to formula in these circumstances.

I found expressing horrendous. The word "express" doesn't help because it makes it sound fast and easy. Which are the two things it's not. I only managed to express for a few days before I gave up because it was painful and exhausting. I personally found breastfeeding easier once I got over the pain. I also bottle fed for a while which was easier in some ways but also hard (getting up in the middle of the night to go downstairs and sterilise etc). IMO both bottle and breastfeeding have their benefits and drawbacks. The best thing to do is work out what's right for YOU, rather than doing what you think you should do.

One thing I've noticed is that both bottle and breastfeeding have drawn negative comments. So you can't win no matter what you do, which is very sad.

The only thing that matters is that any woman does what's best for her baby and herself. It's no good for the baby if the mother is exhausted and in pain all the time. Frankly the only thing I care about is others judging people for their choices. Until you've walked a mile with their breasts and all that!

I bf until 16 months (until the little beast bit me and I bled from somewhere you never want to see blood!), but I had a baby who cottoned on quickly and I never got sore. In other circumstances I might well have FF.

Either way you've done your best OP, and that's the only thing that matters

On a population level the differences are quite significant, that said it doesn't mean all BF babies will be healthier than FF ones or that all FF babies will be ill all the time. It sounds like your DD is susceptible to illnesses, it may be that she would have been even worse if you'd FF her.

My friendship group has a very high BF rate (100% to 6 months across 20 babies) and all the children have different levels of general health.

Mine were both BF for a year, one has the odd cold, the other hayfever, colds, allergies galore - I think the thing that made the biggest difference between them was having an EMCS (allergies etc) v VB (relatively healthy), all besides the point because I had no choice anyhow.

I liked BF, because I found it easy, if I hadn't it would have been FF all the way.

ouchbollocks I think it's partly a matter of personality. It just doesn't suit some people to sit on the couch for hours, clusterfeeding and everything else that goes with breastfeeding (at least in the first few weeks).The thing is, breastfeeding is an 'animal' ie purely biological function, whereas human life has developed far beyond a purely biological level.
It is true I didn't have much support when I (briefly) breastfed, but truthfully I wouldn't gave wanted it anyway, because I wasn't happy with the way my whole life seemed to revolve around breastfeeding.

My dd3 has been far healthier for being bf for longer that dd1 and2.