AIBU to not have this little boy around to play?

[user1491572121]

DD is 9 and there's a little boy who is in her class who has moved into a house nearby to us a few months ago.

He's a perfectly decent little boy I suppose...but something about him rubs me up the wrong way. He's not "naughty" but he is quite cheeky....he makes personal remarks which at 9 he's old enough to know better about...about my house and the way I look etc.

He is quite "Oh I've got one of those but mine's better" about pretty much anything DD has. And "Oh our house is much nicer than yours"

These are just a few examples.

Anyway there's a stream near our house and I took DD and this boy there a few times not long after they moved in. Now, DD keeps on and on at me to take them again.

I've said no as I just don't want to spend time with the boy and I can't leave them alone near the water as it's deep and a bit lonely there.

His Mother also gets on my nerves.

DD won't accept it. She has loads of mates...this little boy is not particularly close to her or anything. I just don't want to encourage the friendship because he's rude.

AIBU?

No, no CCTV! Yes I did expect my very basic rules about being polite when you're a guest to be adhered to at all times! Of course you have to hope for the best, and of course it would have been unreasonable to expect them to be 'adult standard' polite at 9, but I would (almost!) be prepared to stake my life that none of them would ever have said to a friend anything along the lines of "Oh our house is much nicer than yours" or "Why is your skin such a lumpy mess?" and "You look very scruffy today" to a friend's parent!

ParentingEnnuie whilst we can't know for certain what are own children are like when out of our sight and earshot, we can know what other people's kids are like when at our houses. We have a lot of children in and out of the house (my middle one is 9) and comments like "why is your skin such a lumpy mess" are not normal 9 year old.

I'm quite fat and not one of the dozens and dozens of 9 year olds who have been to our house over the past 4 or 5 years has ever pointed it out to me :o

Comments like "why is your skin such a lumpy mess?" are beyond lacking a filter, they are quite vitriolic.

"Why is your skin lumpy?" or "Why are you fat?" or "Why is your house messy/ small?" are something you might hear occasionally from a tiny minority of over confident and under socialised 5 or 6 year olds (most will have got over saying things like when they embarrassed their parents by innocently asking them about other people in public at 2 or 3). Anyone still saying that sort of thing directly to people at 9 is being very deliberately unpleasant or has a sad back story or is hearing that sort of comment made by their parents (or saying it to their parents and having it treated as sweet/ funny/ straight talk / clever by them), or has specific special needs of the type that effect emotional maturity.

Though there are various possible reasons or explanations why a 9 year old might not know better, it is not remotely normal for a NT 9 year old.

*our not are

YANBU why should you take him? He's rude and you don't want to, so don't

5moreminutes

"Though there are various possible reasons or explanations why a 9 year old might not know better, it is not remotely normal for a NT 9 year old"

Yes I agree. OP not interested though..

keeplooking

Yes I agree.

I did not say that this was remotely a usual way for a child to speak. OP not interested in hearing what to do about it, beyond condemning parenting and never seeing the child again