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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU husband went out with couples friends without me

226 replies

Flobird61 · 18/04/2017 06:24

I'll try to make a long story short. My husband wanted to take me to a concert but waited for the last minute and could only get 1 ticket. I wanted to go with him so he said if he couldn't get another ticket he would sell his. A group of his couple friends we're going so we'd make a night of it.
Well he couldn't get another ticket so I said that it wasn't really fair to go on his own so he should sell it. Well he didn't and buggered off to this concert with all of his friends he was the only single one. Then to rub salt into the wound I had to watch pictures all evening popping up on FB with selfies of them all.
It really upset me and it caused a massive row. He said he was really sorry but it didn't look like that from his pictures.
I would have never done this to him.
AIBU

Ps. I don't mind if he has nights out without me but this felt we should have gone together

OP posts:
GinIsIn · 18/04/2017 06:30

Well you had a weird attitude to start with - I am going to miss out so I want you to be miserable too. I'd never want my husband to miss something he'd enjoy just because I was being petty. Why didn't you just say that one of you would go to the concert and arrange a different date night? I don't get why you both had to miss the concert.

Trifleorbust · 18/04/2017 06:32

I would have told him to go and have a lovely time.

KateDaniels2 · 18/04/2017 06:32

I am confused. He wanted to take you to a concert, or you wanted to go?

hesterton · 18/04/2017 06:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SinglePringle · 18/04/2017 06:34

Eh?! You both wanted to go. Only one ticket was bought / available so instead of one of you going, you wanted to sell the ticket so both would miss out?!

Bonkers.

YABU.

sonjadog · 18/04/2017 06:34

I think you are being really selfish.

Headinthedraw · 18/04/2017 06:36

He really wants to go to a concert.You can't go so you try to stop him from going .He makes the decision to go to the concert he has bought a ticket for rather than miss out.You then get jealous of him enjoying it.YABU. And quite controlling.

fanniboz · 18/04/2017 06:37

YABU, definitely. Pretty horrid actually

WannaBe · 18/04/2017 06:37

Two issues. To expect him to not go because you couldn't was selfish.

However, if me/dp were planning o go to an event and it turned out we could only get one ticket we probably wouldn't have ought the one ticket. But the moment the ticket was bought the concert was happening, IMO.

Donthate · 18/04/2017 06:38

You are being massively unreasonable. You should have bought a ticket if you wanted to go. You are not joined at the hip.

Original poster
Flobird61 · 18/04/2017 06:38

I wanted to go to the concert with him and have an evening out with him and our friends. He bought 1 ticket hoping he'd be able to get another one and said if he couldn't get one he'd sell it. Then just went without me.
I don't feel like I was being petty I was looking forward to an evening out.

OP posts:
LineysRun · 18/04/2017 06:40

If my OH wanted to take me to a concert and there was only 1 ticket available, he wouldn't buy it.

We'd do something else.

GinIsIn · 18/04/2017 06:41

He probably said he'd sell it because he knew you'd behave unreasonably if he didn't. And oh look, you are. We get that you wanted to go. The question is why you wanted to make sure your husband missed out on something he really wanted to do.

WateryTart · 18/04/2017 06:41

YABU. He tried to get another ticket but he couldn't. No need for both of you to miss out.

SinglePringle · 18/04/2017 06:42

In your OP you say you said he should sell the ticket if he were only able to purchase one.

In your update you say he said he'd sell the ticket if he's only able to buy one...

KateDaniels2 · 18/04/2017 06:43

So its not that he wanted to take you to THAT concert.

You both wanted to go?

It really depends. If it was something dh was really interested in and i was just going for the night out, i wo5ild be fine with him going alone.

I am totallu confused why its only his fault that you both left it too late to get tickets if its something you both wanted to do.

Its not an ideal situation however i think its pointless you both missing out.

Original poster
Flobird61 · 18/04/2017 06:44

The tickets had all sold out otherwise I would have bought one.

I wanted to go to the concert. He bought 1 ticket and He said if he couldn't get another ticket he wouldn't go without me.
Then he changed his mind.

I'm not controlling he has his life and goes out with friends but this was a couples evening he was the only one that went without his partner.

OP posts:
KateDaniels2 · 18/04/2017 06:44

And if you want an evening out arrange something. Either with or without your dh.

OhDearToby · 18/04/2017 06:44

I don't really see the problem, apart from that he changed his mind about selling it. Which he probably only said so you would say "no, you go and enjoy yourself" which is what most people would do.

You say they were his friends? It really sounds fine to me. He went out with his friends and had a nice time.

LindyHemming · 18/04/2017 06:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KateDaniels2 · 18/04/2017 06:46

but this was a couples evening he was the only one that went without his partner.

And what? Surely no one arranges nighta out where you can only attend if you are a couple?

Why is this part bothering you?

Penhacked · 18/04/2017 06:47

Tamburino to feel left out but why outsource the ticket finding to dh?

GinIsIn · 18/04/2017 06:48

I wanted to go to the concert. He bought one ticket... OP did you say you wanted to go before or after he already bought his ticket...? Also you say that you told him to sell it, then that he offered, and that they are couple friends then that they are his friends - which is it...?

SinglePringle · 18/04/2017 06:50

Couples evening. Ugh.

Would no single friends have been allowed to attend?

Original poster
Flobird61 · 18/04/2017 06:51

The reason he never bought tickets first of all was because his friend was working the door and told him for us to just turn up and he'd let us in so I left it for him to sort as I don't know the friend. At the last minute it came up on FB that the concert had sold out. So when a ticket came up for sale he bought it and said if he couldn't get another one he wouldn't go without me.
That's why I feel hurt.

I appreciate all your opinions so it's obvious I am being unreasonable I guess I need to look into that.

OP posts: