Staying at in laws-AIBU?

[Snowflakes1122]

We are currently staying at in laws. Every morning without fail DH, FIL and the kids all get breakfast. DH and FIL get full on eggs, bacon the works etc and the kids whatever they want.
It's like I'm bloody invisible! I've been helping myself to some old cornflakes but they are all gone now. I don't even like them!

So this morning I've been sat watching everyone else eat lovely food and have coffees brought starving and 31 weeks pregnant. I wanted to cry!

I can't go into their kitchen and start making something as that offends MIL

AIBU to be pissed off, hormonal and upset? Why does she leave me out?

What the actual fuck is wrong with your husband tolerating that from his own parents?

If you're able, you need to move house. It will only get worse. Especially when the new addition arrives. You won't have a say. You will be told or scolded. Been there!

Ask her if she could cook you something too. Or just cook yourself something.

Is this a joke ?? 31 weeks preggers or not... Get up before everyone else... and go out to the nearest cafe and order the works!! Leave the kids with DH and take your time. They'll soon take the hint!

Tell your children, they will always repeat what you say to MIL.

Was your voice stolen by a sea witch leaving you to rely on DH to speak for you? You have two choices, martyr yourself waiting for someone to notice poor you being slowly starved at breakfast or you speak up.

"MIL, where do you keep the eggs? I'd like to make myself some scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast today"

If she argues about you going in her kitchen then follow up with "Oh, it's just that I haven't had any breakfast yet. I can make it if you just tell me where you keep everything"

There are many ways your MIL could be "missing you off" the breakfast list - are you up earlier/later than everyone else so that MIL assumes you ate when you got up or will get something when you're ready? Have you said no to breakfast before? Has she seen you eating the cornflakes and assumed you wanted to just have cereal not a full breakfast every day so let you get on with it? etc - because I can't imagine a whole family sitting round a table, eating together and not notice someone sitting with no food on more than one morning and not said anything, either to you or anyone else.

Doormat.com

Go easy on OP - she is pregnant, which is a time of vulnerability & hormones do funny things to you.

No matter how lovely, the MIL is the issue here. I know I don't ever feel entirely comfortable cooking in MIL's kitchen but OP has stated she's not allowed to use it.

So MIL knows she's not having breakfast and frankly doesn't care because the men and children are the priority and need spoiling not the pregnant women. Hence why the OP is hurt.

She shouldn't have to speak up for herself and say "please can I have breakfast" MIL should make some sort of provision whether that's by leaving her a warm plateful or telling her what's available. By having to ask, when everyone else is just offered, makes her feel awkward and demanding. It also highlights MIL's deficiencies, rudeness and ignorance.

You probably only get served at other meals because she is making one big meal, not several individual orders. I can understand why, if she's got up at a different time and DH is busy with children or chatting with his dad etc, he hasn't noticed amongst the general hustle & bustle.

But I would be upset too. YANBU.

Lol hilarious people prefer to starve for four days than make a sandwich or asking one without butter.
Who are all these pathetic doormats? I never met such a bloody drama queen idiot in real life

But surely, if MIL just asked "Are you ok snowflake, have you had breakfast", that would also go a long way. There's no sense of care here, just assumption that she's perfectly happy on her stale cornflakes.

Martyrdom gone mad, 😂😂😂 stake cornflakes 😂😂😂😂

Go easy on OP - she is pregnant, which is a time of vulnerability & hormones do funny things to you

Do hormones generally take away the power of speech :) :) ??

Go easy on OP - she is pregnant, which is a time of vulnerability & hormones do funny things to you

I hate this: she's pregnant so lets infantilise her and make the rules of normal adulting not apply. No thanks.

Hormones don't stop people asking for breakfast. They don't force people to scrounge stale food rather than pleasantly asking for some. That's being a total wally not hormones.
I don't feel sorry for the op in the least ffs!

Pregnant women are so vulnerable and hormonal they can't ask for or get their own breakfast?

Why don't some people just say something? No need to be antagonistic or rude, just ask politely "is there any for me?" ... if you're frightened of your lovely MIL, ask your DH why you didn't get any and why he didn't realise you didn't get any selfish sod ... as for the poster who didn't eat for 4 days ... ugh

I would go out and buy breakfast in a nice cafe. Take kids with you.

I scrolled down wondering if there was an explanation for why the husband hadn't said anything. It's beyond bizarre that he ate and didn't sort you out.

How old are the kids? I have teens who can be super selfish but they would have asked out loud or offered some of their food to me.

I also think there seems to be a communication issue between you and partner. Speak to him and ask him if he notices you were not offered anything.

In our house we would not all be appearing at the breakfast table at same time though. Dh may go down whilst iwas in the shower so we'd have no idea whether fil would have offered the other breakfast or not. We'ed each help ourselves like normal adults.

This is like a Victorian melodrama! Why are you staying there? Can't you leave? (Sorry not read preceding pages.)

If the cereal was stale I'd pop to shop and buy more, or dhwould. We aren't the drama llama types who suffer in silence hoping for our plight to be noticed.

This strikes me as be8ng really odd! Why would MIL ignore the op? Why would the op not say that she would like some breakfast too? Amp why has no one else noticed?!@@

Go easy on OP - she is pregnant, which is a time of vulnerability & hormones do funny things to you

And what part of that robs you of your voice?

I was very hormonal when I was pregnant, but it never stopped me asking for a cup of tea or a sandwich if I was hungry!