To think my friend is a tight arse???

[FataliePorkman]

Just been out for lunch with three friends and our DCs- the children all had the same (lunchboxes with a carton drink and then a small crispy cake) but us adults ate/drank varying amounts. Two of the friends are a couple and the other is single like me. Let's call her Joan.

3/4 of us shared a bottle and extra glass of wine and 2 soft drinks. Joan didn't drink as she lives further away from the pub than us so was driving.
We all had a starter and a main course and then we got a chessboard to share between us- but only me and the couple had some. Joan had 3 DC with her, I have 3 DC and the couple have 1 DC.

Anyway the bill came and friend from the couple suggested we split the bill 3 ways equally. I was fine with this, as were the couple. Joan refused and said she would only pay for what her and her DC had.

Awkward tension followed- Joan paid for her meal and her DC while me and my other two friends split the bill.

AIBU to think she is a bit tight??

My colleague told me that they were calling me a cow to his other friends (they were a large group who had been friends since student days).

Still no OP??

sorry i missed that part chloe-yes understandable

does he still speak to them?

GabsALot

I never asked him unfortunately! We've drifted apart now.

Honestly, paying your own way is much fairer. When vegetarians are part of such groups, they would have to order more dishes in order to come near the prices of non-vegetarian food.

Not read all the replies, but I have to say yes, YABU. If she hasn't drunk anything and you have been necking the wine and splashing out on a cheeseboard as well that she didn't want or eat - then why on earth should she expect to be made to pay for it?!
She already had herself and two kids to pay for. Maybe she's on a budget? It's not like she said she wasn't going to pay for what she had or left you short.
I think it's definitely you being unreasonable for expecting her to subsidise your drinking and eating. Maybe she's on a tight budget but wanted to see her friends regardless so thought she'd come out and just pay for her and her family? Nothing wrong with that at all.

OK, just reading through the replies now and see I'm not a lone voice.
Did the OP ever come back though? Or was it just a dump and run?!

I stopped off with some friends and family over the weekend for food after a day out (I paid the whole bill because I wanted to treat my kids and grandkids and was aware That the two friends had spent a lot of money getting to me)

All under 12's had a kids meal that including the drink and pudding cost around £4 the adult mains were between £12 and £17 each starters and puddings about £6 each wine around £5.80 a glass and a cheeseboard was £9

If we had been splitting the bill 2 adults with wine and cheese plus 1 kid would not have been the same as one adult without those things and 3 kids

have just seen OP posting on another thread did they ever return to this one?

I would rather a tight arse mate than one that's rude and cannot handle the truth.

Still no OP?

OK, just reading through the replies now and see I'm not a lone voice.

I needed an example to explain the word "understatement" to my wife, who isn't a native speaker. Thanks for that.

OP has started another thread about slapping a friend with MH issues.
I think we'll leave this one to MNHQ

@FataliePorkman

C'mon OP, look how much everyone wants an update. It would be your good deed of the day. 👍🏻

I get really annoyed at this. YADBU, I wouldn't have wanted to subsidise your meal either. I'm a single mum with 2 dc and go out with friends and their dc, they always say split it between us i.e. I pay the same amount as the couple. I soon realised I was being taken for a mug as I don't drink and there are twice as many of them!

'OP has started another thread about slapping a friend with MH issues.
I think we'll leave this one to MNHQ'

Oh I knew it - damned trolls are doing my head in.

So many bad stories.
I have going for meals with people I'm not close to for this ferry reason.
I also wont drink in rounds unless we are drinking similar drinks.
A woman one asked me to buy her drink and she'd get the, next round. WheN she asked for a double vodka and coke i said no, I'm only drinking draft cider.

There are a couple of obvious troll threads going at the moment. What I can't get past is neither are very good and pretty obvious yet they are getting a lot of serious responses. My trolldar is usually pretty crap (didn't spot this one) but some are so obvious or become so obvious it's almost laughable.

hecate, that's what I usually do, I make sure it isn't "oh poor you, you are so amazing, you are my hero OP" response, just a short sentence showing slight support .

Not sure why the other thread started by op is being looked into but this one stands...

^ I reported the other one. Asked MNHQ to take a look as the general consensus was the OP was disingenuous. I thought the opening post about slapping someone with depression was goadier than a splitting the bill debate.