AIBU to pack DH and the kids' cases?

[Confuso]

A friend who is normally lovely has just turned on me out of the blue. I've had her 7 year old DD here all day which is absolutely fine as she is good friends with my DD. My older two have been mooching around and I've been mainly in "project pack" as we're going on holiday tomorrow night.

When my friend came to collect at 4pm, she had to come upstairs and drag her DD out of our wardrobe because she was playing a hiding game. In the midst of this she suddenly started on me, saying she couldn't believe I was actually ironing and packing for DH. Haven't I got enough to do with the kids? I should stop acting like a bloody martyr because this man doesn't know he's born and never did. Her 12 year old packs his own stuff like any other capable child and I should stop pandering to the lot of them. I have been making a rod for my own back for too long and DH is on another planet There was more as well.

Don't most people pack for the family if you're going away and AIBU to think I'm not weird and wonder what all that was about? I feel quite upset tbh as I've had her DD for 2 days and that's how she speaks to me.

The issue here is not what you do within your own family arrangements, that is your business as long as you are all happy with it. I am sure in every family there would be things we would all be askance at about how other families operate. The big issue is how dare she come into your family home and pass judgement without being asked, I would be really upset if I were you about that and expect her to apologise for her outburst. Did she feel her child was in some way not getting enough attention as you were packing? Or not like the hide and seek or being in the wardrobe upstairs........?

I do think packing is a really useful life skill for children to learn, and as early as possible- some PPs have had great ways to involve them from pretty small - and I'd be concerned about a grown man who wasn't actually capable of doing his own packing, but I wouldn't think it was my place to comment on it the way your friend did. I might say something jokey, but not fly at you like that.

and I'd be concerned about a grown man who wasn't actually capable of doing his own packing,

Me too- but I have never met a man like this- have you?

My DD always loved to get involved with packing as a child, my DS couldn't give too hoots.
They are now both young adults and both equally adept at packing.

I really don't see packing as a " life skill".
A bit like using the wahing machine- not rocket science.