To ask someone to sit at a table while I'm in a queue?

[DedicationToSparkleMotion]

I had no idea this is apparently rude?

Today while in a cafe queue I said to DH "go and get a seat while I pay". He looked horrified said I was effectively "pushing in front" of those queueing in front of us and we shouldn't sit until we had ordered and paid.

I don't really agree and think everyone does this if they are in a group (after all if a family of five go in are they all going to stand in a queue together? What if everyone did this, the queue area would be overrun?!) and it's neither polite nor impolite, but he was insistent.

Who was BU?

But insisting I'm the rude one for waiting my turn is patently troll behaviour.
You can think you're right to push in, that's your privilege, but the cafe owner will ask you to move to make way for their paying customers, that's his/her privilege also.

Calling laundry a troll! Honestly! How rude.

But insisting I'm the rude one for waiting my turn is patently troll behaviour
Nobody said that! You're rude for going around harassing other customers, with your husband, trying to oust them from their seats. That is bad manners, if you can't see that then there's little point continuing the conversation.

but the cafe owner will ask you to move to make way for their paying customers

I don't know what sort of cafes you frequent, but the owner themselves asking other paying customers to move! The other customers will likely have their drinks/food by the time you've escalated it to that point anyway.

It's very rude and I can't stand it. I never realised it was rude until I stared going places alone. People who came before you should have their chance to choose a table and then when it's your turn you go.

It's rude to just select a table without waiting your turn but people seem to do it as standard these days.

Reuset Can't you accept other people have different opinions to you or are you just trying to rise people?

It depends Which point are you referring to exactly?

Re getting the manager how can you prove that I'm the may entitled re pace in queue of partner. By the time we've got that far, the toddler's are back in the chair etc my partner will probably be over with lunch so dip I sit back down our do you get my table and I find someone else to evict??
Our were could all just sensibly find a seat and go and order

Helping Margaret out.

Sainsbury café. Seemingly all single people in queue ordering food for more than one... Café is mix of table service (take a number at the till) and wait for you order stuff. Space for queue is not designed for huge numbers of people

Fourth bit of research in support of the OP. I was in Pret just after 9am on Thursday morning. Huge city centre location cafe, over two floors. Empty as this time of morning. However, people still 'securing' seats, if not single people, even though there is no need to. It's more about having only one person queuing for coffee or food.

Friendly chap serving said that people in pairs or groups usually only sent one to order in busy or quiet periods, and they would strongly 'discourage' people from attempting to remove others from seats (as pps).

Good call reuset. I think it's particularly interesting what the staff in cafes think about it. I'm glad that in Pret (and most likely the places similar) they don't encourage people attempting to remove other people from seats, although I would laugh in someone's face if they asked me to move, it's good to know that they wouldn't back them up!

I think it depends. Mum's with children struggle, so seating them down and using harnesses on high chairs, helps mum enormously and means we don't have children running around where there's hit food. Also, the elderly and disabled need seats quickly if they're unable to stand for any period of time. I find a seat, sometimes where there's people sat there already. Sometimes I ask for help, pay for my food and ask a waitress to find me a seat. They have been known to oust an able customer to wait for another seat, then sit me there. It depends if the person being ousted is just him, his wife and maybe one other, I do suggest we share. That way everyone's happy! 😉

I am often on my own with a baby in a buggy and can't coordinate buggy tray and food once its purchased. I'll seat the baby close by and the food certainly not going to purchase food and have nowhere to sit and eat it and would give someone short shrift if they tried to oust me from my seat. More than happy to share though.

Totallybonkersmum nope doesn't matter if you're in pain, uncomfortable, have triplets, using your logic to sensibly get a table before you order so you definately have somewhere to eat - all that matters is you're shamelessly stealing the table freedom a handful of mn'ers who would rather make their elderly granny queue with them behind the couple with triplet toddlers and a whole host of other people than just find a table first