To have cried in the pub toilet

[roarityroar]

Because a man I don't know at the bar said "oh wow, you look just like Bridget Jones!"?

I'm 28 and not that it matters a size 8. I've had a hugely difficult week and felt quite confident today and now I feel crushed and stupid and fat and disgusting.

I had a spectacular dumping at 28. I thought my life was over. And I had a few 'relationships' that did little to help my self esteem.

I'm now 38, married with two kids and happy as anything. You never know how it will go

OK cross post - but what I said still stands. He was being a git and trying to knock you off kilter.

I think you've twisted an innocent comment into something it was never intended to be.

Personally, I'd of been flattered...

Where the hell do men get off commenting on a stranger's appearance?

Was it that though? It sounds like he just genuinely though there was a resemblance. OK it might be a bit rude to comment on a perceived likeness, to a complete stranger, but I've heard as many women do that as men. My neighbour is a dead ringer for Ben Fogle, and I've told him so. Maybe I was rude without realising?
Bridget Jones is lovely, btw.

It doesn't really matter whether he was negging you or complimenting you. He is some randomer in a bar, what he thinks doen't matter. Your self esteem seems to be very wrapped up in your appearance.

You give me hope jengr

I'm not allowed to exercise for 3 weeks post termination so can't use that to control anxiety. I've eaten half a sandwich today and won't eat anymore.

It was a compliment.

What on earth is 'negging'?

Based on your last post I'm wondering if a pub is suitable for you right now? Only eating half a sandwich?

I don't drink alcohol either

Op, please ensure that you have adequate nutrition, you need to her physically and mentally from the termination

That could easily be a compliment. Surely you could tell by the way he said it whether he was trying to be nice or not?

Roar sorry to hear you've had a terrible week. You poor wee thing.
Thus is the time to cosset yourself, do nice things and eat and drink nice things.
Not half a sandwich.

Your ED will tell you otherwise but you are important enough to feed nutritious, wholesome food.

Fuck what some random said. In one night I got told I look like Dawn French and Victoria Beckham. Men dont see weight like we do.

Negging is a 'flirting technique' used by absolute arseholes - the idea is that you put a woman down and then she'll feel so shit about herself, she'll be grateful for the guy's attention. Apparently it's a thing. Lovely, isn't it?

I think the pub man, in a cack-handed way, was trying to tell you that you look like a Hollywood filmstar, not a chubby singleton. I bet you are utterly and enviably slender and gorgeous. Go have a and here are some

Never heard of it. The guy was with his girlfriend and she laughed at me too, even when she saw tears spring in my eyes.

Will do what I can. I feel so sick in general at the moment with anxiety that I haven't been eating. I'm well within the healthy weight bracket for height (5"4 55kg) so no risk

Also, regardless of whether you drink, pubs are always full of twats who ARE drunk. Please don't let this set you back.

Emma thank you: when tge world feels so shit the kindness of strangers is pretty magical.

Could have been worse,he could have said Vinnie Jones.

I can't see why they would randomly insult you, but if they were doing that, they'd presumably choose to compare you to somebody unattractive/fat rather than somebody normal/good looking, so I do think you got the wrong end of the stick, yes.

Keep working on your self esteem and confidence.

I'm still getting over the fact that you think 'it won't happen' at 28!!!

You're a young and lovely spring chicken! A million (positive) things can happen in the next few years. You don't know who or what is around the corner.

FWIW I wish I looked like Bridget Jones. My first boyfriend compared me to Victoria Wood. She was funny but still..,

I was told as a teenage girl that I looked like Wayne Hussey out of The Mission. That was super offensive. I agree that it sounds like a compliment to be compared to Bridget Jones but after the tough time you have had I totally understand that every nerve is raw. Maybe draw your horns in and surround yourself with safe supportive things and people. I hope you can come to terms with what has happened and that you feel better and happier in time x

Wrt why I was upset, I'm 2 years off 30 and exercise daily: BJ/Rz is beautiful but not what I aspire and work and starve to be.

Really borders ? I feel like I've made so many mistakes, I'm scared of my future and not ever falling in love and having children, I desperately regret this termination. I regret everything I am.