Graphista I don't find it hard to understand that it is women at all. It is based on years of conditioning. We are also told to be grateful for what we have. Women's rights have moved forward so much that many women are just grateful we have it better than our female ancestors.
For example I'm grateful I can open my own bank account without my husbands permission. But I'm not horrified that that wasn't always the case. I accept that as a reality.
I think where I fall down is that I don't look forward and see what can be achieved next. Rightly or wrongly some women interpret rebalancing the scales as actually disadvantaging men. I understand that the number of false allegations is low, but to say there has never been a scorned woman who has played the system is too much of a broad brush for many to stomach. Just as there are evil men, there are evil women. (I don't actually believe in evil, but I'm using it to make a point).
So where are the fail safes for that? I don't have the answers. I think you are correct with education. I don't think we will ever irradicate rape, but I do think it would reduce the 'accidental rape'.
I don't mean he did it without realising, I mean the institutionalised entitlement some men have that means they knew they were having sex, but her consent was not important enough that he should look at her face throughout to see her enjoyment/lack thereof.
I had a lot of casual sex as a young woman. Some that would now be classed as rape, but even I didn't know that at the time. I don't believe the men knew this either, because I looked away so they couldn't see me cry. I didn't want sex with them but I didn't say stop because I felt I had led them to this point (I had) and would let them down. I wasn't scared of them, I was scared of myself. wanted to feel loved and had no idea how to find that love.
Fuck, there's another screen name gone after putting all that out there.