To hate new haircut 💇🏻

[Pugmomma]

Long story short as i can squeeze it.. a few years ago I had an absolutely god awful experience at the hairdressers, where after asking her to 'take an inch off just to get rid of any dead ends' the silly cow lopped half my wig off - I kid you not I'm talking like 4/5 inches (my hair was virgin hair no colour no bleach no heat damage, it was also waist length, really thick and I bloody loved it).

Anyway, spent about a week crying and since then I've been so wary of the hairdressers and have had a hairdresser friend give me a trim/style every 3 months ish (hair was long - waist to bum length) and I was very happy with it, she was brilliant.

Fast forward to this year and my friend has moved away and I've had no hairdresser so I finally decided to brave it and go to a reputable salon (Toni & Guy no less!), told the woman what I wanted, just an inch off to rid the dead ends and a hair mask treatment. Sat there quite happy with a brew and a biscuit, while she chops away at the back of my head, couldn't see what she was doing as she's behind me, then she comes to the side of me and continues cutting and I had an absolute heart attack when I saw the length she'd taken off - actually did a little yelp which made her stop. She'd taken off about 5 inches!! She stopped and asked was I ok and I've had a little raging hissy bitch fit, manager comes running over, I've told her the situation and she bless her heart was very apologetic, tried telling me the girl who'd done it was still in training, but as half my hair was shoulder blades and the other half at my bum, I had no choice but to let the manager take over and chop the other half.

It's taken me years to grow it so long, not to mention the amount I've spent maintaining it with keratase masks, heat defence treatments, Moroccan oil shampoo etc. I'm absolutely devastated.

DP loved my long hair (he never even noticed when I had it trimmed in the past) and when I walked through the door after having been the hairdressers he actually looked shocked, and said oh they've taken a good bit off and told me I should complain to head office so I know it doesn't seem to be suiting me at all. Even DD who's 3 asked me what happened to mummy's rapunzel hair

The manager gave me a free voucher for 'next time' which I feel like burning. I'm actually sat here in tears. I reckon it's going to take over a year to grow back to anywhere near where it was.

AIBU to feel like ripping my actual hair out? Has anybody else ever had this?

Also feel obliged to say I'm in my mid twenties, so not mutton dressed as lamb with the long hair (my mum has ridiculous opinions of older women with longer hair but she's just an old moaner - I love older ladies with longer hair- I remember being amazed by Edna's hair in emmerdale!!)

This kind of fear is very much real. Always amazes me how people will happily take the piss over fear of hair cuts yet will completely sympathise with those terrified of spiders or snakes etc.

Pug, it is no help, but it does grow.

When I was about 9 I suffered from massive headaches. At the time my long, thick hair was at the back of my knees and my GP concluded the weight of it in a pony tail was causing my headaches and I should get it trimmed.

Mum took me to the hairdressers that weekend and had me a paige boy cut. Horrified does not cover it. It is genuinely distressing to look at pictures of me from that time.
From that day on I've been very wary indeed of hairdressers. In the last ten years I've found one who understands my issues around hair. If I have it trimmed or layered she'll show me before she cuts how much she's taking off, I'm comfortable with her because she understands.

Pug find someone who you trust. Explain your issues, I promise you a good hairdresser will completely understand.

YANBU!

I'll second and third pp - cut your own hair! I've cut my hair myself since my teens and haven't looked back. I use Feye's self trimming method that is linked above.

Also, if you are more on top of things than I am dusting is great - you only remove the damage so it's great if you want to grow out your hair. Trimming can often take off too much!

(Also don't listen to the negativity - mn isn't often a long hair friendly place )

Haha, I'm in the long and uncool club too! Also at age 51 I'm meant to have my lovely hair chopped off to fit some loser's stereotype of mum hair < being mutton and all>

In that first picture op your hair looks like it needs a good cut imo. Yanbu to be unhappy but i think you are overreacting.

Haha, I'm in the long and uncool club too! Also at age 51 I'm meant to have my lovely hair chopped off to fit some loser's stereotype of mum hair < being mutton and all>

Haha! I'm 45 and growing mine long again and it's purple.

My mum had hair she could sit on until she died aged 80. It suited her, she looked beautiful with it all piled up on her head and very sophisticated.

I take perfecticil hair vitamins - my hair grows really quickly and is much healthier, maybe try any vitamin with biotin in it?

I can empathise with you! I had a really bad job done on my hair last month. I told the hairdresser I needed to bleach my hair, get s bit of thickness, also told her I wanted the same style but I wanted a trim. An inch or two off please.
She didn't bleach my hair, just put on a colour through foils and let me not start on the cut. It looks like I've cut my own side fringe in. There's about 4 inches taken off my hair. So flipping annoyed. I imagine you probably feel devastated as your hair is important to you, whereas mine isn't that important. I'd like it to be tidy! That's about my biggest concern!

yanbu OP and take the rude comments in the 'DFOD' bin

I absolutely empathise with you - although my hair is a short crop I'd be mortified if a stylist did something I didn't ask for.

You have beautiful hair, in all of the pics, but I appreciate to you it feels short.

For the posters that have commented about losing hair due to cancer, alopecia etc, well of course this isn't a big problem compared but it matters to the OP - and who are you to say she shouldn't be bothered by it. Looks don't matter to some - they are important to me and I spend time and money on my face and hair, not everyones cup of tea but I respect that. Maybe a bit of respect to those who don't?

If I'm honest your hair looks much better in the third picture.

I'll probably get shot down here but I think very long hair only works for certain thickness and curlyness levels.

Just my humble opinion.

And I believe hair grows about half an inch a month so in 10 months you'll be back to waist length.

Itvlooks great in the 3rd pic and stil long.

Sadly i will never have rapunzel hair... too fine.

I've been trying to get T&G to give me layers for my past three hair cuts but for some reason they won't do it. I need to go to your branch OP! They keep leaving it one length and it's so thick and long (well not by your standards but bra strap length) that it feels far too heavy. I don't like it. I want it like your after pic.

I do understand though. A bad haircut when you're proud of your hair can really knock your confidence. I've cried over a bad haircut before. Lots of people do.

You don't have a bad haircut though imo and it will grow really fast at your age. Just think of it as a way of improving your hair's condition even more.

It seems T&G are universally shit!

What is their work mantra, I wonder - the customer is always wrong?

I've been trying to get T&G to give me layers for my past three hair cuts but for some reason they won't do it.

Why have you been going back to a hairdresser that won't cut your hair how you want?

Op I'm not sure why people are being so horrible to you here. It's like a lot of people have an issue with very long hair.

The hairdresser has no right to decide for you what she thinks your hair should be like, neither does anyone here.

Fwiw if the third picture is your hair now it still honestly looks really nice. It's still a lovely long length and your hair is a great colour.

It's not unreasonable to be upset if they took off more than you wanted, but your reaction is OTT. It's still very long hair and looks in better nick now than it did before, judging by your pic. My daughter has waist length hair and the bottom 5 inches or so do look a bit scruffy and probably could do with chopping off to get rid off all the split ends. That's probably what your hair dresser thought and she might have done you a favour. Long isn't always lovely if the ends need a damn good trim.

OP, YANBU.
I'm glad other posters have come to give support because after reading the first few pages with an open mouth and getting more and more riled up I couldn't believe the snarky misery guts on here.

All the "grow up" comments/grammar police/the-I'm-cringing-at-repunzal/it's only hair brigade, can quite frankly, get tae fuck.

You rude, arrogant tossers

you have really nice hair, tats a shame, what a fucking MORON that hairdresser was.

this week DS had a haircut and he looks like this, he looks so silly poor little fellow, the damage hairdressers wreak

There is no favour done if the OP is upset and unhappy.
I'd be doing my 13 year old a "favour" by telling him his choice of clothing and styling makes him look ridiculous but I keep shtum because he is exercising his choice of what makes him feel good and of how he expresses himself.

and as for the "my friend has cancer, she lost all her hair"

yes so did mine, and its not relevant.

I hate that feeling when you pay to have your self IMproved and they fucking shear you!! Its GUTTING

I once had very long hair and hated hairdressers who seemed never to appreciate I wanted to keep the long hair.

For 15 years I used something similar to this ( not exactly this as it wasn't available then)

Mine was super easy to use , and the longer your hair is, the easier it is to use it. I used to brush, clip onto the back and slide it down. Then flip the whole thing over my head and trim it. Always looked thick and straight.

This one even has a measure to help get it straight.

Steer clear of hairdressers with bum length hair. They want to style and rarely appreciate keeping long hair intact.

Having said that I found, by happy accident, a superb chap who does my hair and really understands face shapes and hair textures. I now feel sexy with much shorter hair.

I think your hair looks lovely at the new length.

I wonder if the hairdresser was unfamiliar with imperial measurements - did she not realise what you meant when you said an inch?

I have long hair (about the length yours now is) and I always cut my own. It's really easy and you're in control. Just check YouTube for videos.

Seriously get over it, it's nothing permanent like a tattoo, it will grow .There are way more important things in life

I would have been devastated too. How you feel is how you feel. You know not to go back!
I think there is a lot of jealous posters on this thread!

Personally I think your hair looks better after the cut, but I can appreciate your upset.

Your very long hair was clearly very important to you.

The good news is that it will grow back - it will take a while but the situation will remedy itself - unlike a bad dye job that damaged your hair from root to tip - now that really would be a disaster!

I have long hair (not as long as yours though even now) and when I get it cut I show them exactly how much I want taken off by putting my hair through my fingers and demonstrating where to cut.

I'd chalk it up to a bad experience and next time just be super clear (and vigilant) about how much they cut.