To be upset DP has applied for a cabin crew job?

[dogdayafternoons]

NC for this as I feel quite embarrassed by my mean spirited feelings on the matter.

DP applied for a cabin crew job last week and he's been offered an initial assessment. It's his dream job and I should be really happy for him, but I'm struggling to be as encouraging as I should be.

We're getting married soon and also about to embark on IVF treatment. I know it's utterly hypothetical on all levels at this stage, but the horrible part of me feels like it's not really an appropriate job for a married man who may potentially be a father. I don't have any family nearby to help me with a baby. Therefore dp would be my only support and he could potentially be away for big chunks of time. Also it doesn't pay very well, and I can't help feeling the lack of financial reward will not help to make up for me being left on my own so much.

Of course none of this may come to pass. I'm trying to paint a smile on my face, but tbh I feel quite hurt that he wants to pursue this at a point like this.

IABU aren't I?

If it were my ADULT son(and it might be one day) I would expect he was big and ugly enough to know if he wanted to apply for a job or prioritise having a child. Lolling at the idea of 25 as being "barely out of teens".

That's exactly what I look like ifNowNotThenWhenever😉

No one would claim a forty year old man was 'holding back' a twenty something woman purely because of his age

So not true.
Whenever the older party 'controls' the younger, it's off. There is pretty much always some element of power and control ime..

Is this British Airways? If so, all their staff have been striking over pay:-

Basic pay starts at £12,192, although BA says all earn at least £21,000 a year once hourly flying pay and bonuses are added. Unite claims the average pay is £16,000, including allowances.

YANBU, I wouldn't be too happy either. It's a job for a single person really.

Nope, it's not a job for a single person. Many crew are in their 30s, 40s, 50s and even 60s. Many crew have spouses and children.

There seem to be a lot of misconceptions about cabin crew from people who haven't worked as crew.

Cabin crew staff not all staff!

Polarbear I'm cabin crew, Ive done the job for years, decades even, and while it's true that there are many crew in their 40s, 50s and even 60s, it's not really a career anymore. Those older crew were taken on in vastly different circumstances. It was a good job. The pay and conditions have changed a lot, on most airlines. It's a job to have fun and see the world for a few years. You won't see older crew in the future, you would struggle to buy a house or have a family on current contracts,

Not read the full thread but could he apply for a short haul airline to do domestic / European flights which would cut down the number of nights away at least?

Honeyroar - maybe but then millions of jobs are low pay or pay minimum wage - retail, hospitality and care work and many people still have families.

True, but its difficult to explain if you've not been crew. It's not just the money. The nights out of bed and constant time changes/jet lag just wouldn't be doable long term on the contracts given out today. It's exhausting enough as it is.