Applebite - sorry this is long, your posts have really annoyed me.
Your DH was a vaper when you got together. It's both nasty and pointless to keep having a go at him about it. You shouldn't get together with someone you want to change, and you certainly shouldn't have a child with them, it's a recipe for misery.
My DG got gangrene from smoking and lost part of her foot when I was a child. If you'd seen what I saw, it would have made you hate smoking for life too!
You do know that smoking tends to run in families, don't you? HALF of all life-long smokers will die from it, on average a decade early. Many more will endure chronic ill-health for their last 2 or 3 decades. There aren't really any nice smoking-related ways to go (maybe sudden heart attack?). Most smokers will have lost relatives to cancer, COPD, stroke ... or watched relatives cope with debilitating smoking-related diseases for years. I'm very sorry about your DG but it doesn't make you special. Most of us have 'seen what you saw' or similar, or worse.
what if passive vaping does turn out to be dangerous, just as passive smoking is
Do you understand why smoking is dangerous? Inhaling smoke from burning stuff (doesn't matter if it's dried organic kale) is really bad for you because smoke (any smoke) is chock full of carbon monoxide and carcinogenic particles. The vapour from someone's ecig isn't. It has four ingredients, all of which have very good safety records and is not burned, but heated to a vapour (technically an aerosol, like the visible steam from a kettle).
He puts his need to vape above my wishes and our DD. he's brilliant in every other way, but this one thing he simply has a block about, and I hate it.
It's you that has the block. He's been vaping 2 years longer than you've been together. Leave him alone.
we didn't ask smokers to start smoking when they knew full well it was harmful to themselves and others
Most smokers start as children. I was 12. None of us behind the bike sheds imagined we'd be on 20 a day in our 40's because none of us could imagine being 40. Most of us were hooked in a matter of weeks.
And if you only do it outside or in your own home (assuming your family are happy to take the risk too or that you live alone), then that's fine too. People glaring at you for doing it in those situations are being daft. But would you expect other people to be happy with it indoors or in their homes, just because you are?
Public Health England (AKA the government) have said that vaping absolutely should not be treated the same as smoking and that there is no justification for vape bans on health grounds. They are keen for smokers to switch to vaping because a lot fewer people will die (RTFT if you want links).
Er. It's absolutely nothing like anti-vaxxers, what a bonkers comparison
It was me who used the anti vaxxers comparison (which you'd know if you'd RTFT). Whenever there's a thread about vaping someone invariably pops up and posts a load of bullshit scary articles about how vaping is terribly dangerous. The effect of this is that it puts smokers off switching. So they don't. And they die. And the people around them are harmed. I think it's a pretty good comparison myself - two groups of people spreading scaremongering shit that harms people's health.
The more of your posts I read the sorrier I feel for your DP.
Everybody who has managed to quit smoking deserves a fuck ton of praise, whatever method they have used. They've done a fantastic thing for their health and the health of those around them, against very tough odds (over 90% of all quit attempts end in failure) 