Transing a 4 year old

[ShadowChancellor]

On Monday, all the children at my kids school were taught about being transgender because the parent of a reception kid have decided that X is actually Y and are now sending their kid in as the opposite sex and have changed their name.

According to my kid they were shown a video that was all about how if you were a boy and liked girl things and girl clothes you were a girl and it was all very positive.

No parents were told before this happened. We only found out when the kids came out of school on Monday and told us.

AIBU to a) think that transing a kid at 4 years old is more to do with the parents not liking the fact that their kid prefers girls toys to boys toys and b) that the other parents should've been told before they showed our kids this film and promoted it all in school.

Its caused a lot of confusion with the younger kids who think you can change whether you are a boy or girl just by wishing it and didn't mention at all all of the problems that it can cause.

Can you tell us what the video is called? We are looking at schools for soon-to-be-reception-age DD and I need to know that they don't do this kind of thing without parental permission before I decide which school.

Gender identity as proposed in the context you describe ("girls like pink etc") is not universally accepted. There is no agreed definition of gender nor categorical scientific evidence to back it up, it is not law, and they shouldn't be teaching it as a fait accompli. I think it's in the same camp as intelligent design, tbh.

How exactly would you explain this to four year olds? I really doubt they would have the ability to grasp this concept.

Do schools seek verification from anyone other than the parents on this? So, maybe evidence of appointments with the relevant experts in sex dsyphoria?

I am totally behind supporting any child in how they want to present. Clearly the school should be supportive and make it clear that no bullying is acceptable. The school could also do a lot of work about sex based stereotypes and the idea that we're all different, and that sex based stereotypes are harmful to everyone. I would be very unhappy with the school talking about boys/girls brains and being "in the wrong body".

"Since then, Kerry McFadyen, from Scotland, has let her child, Daniel, live as Danni, after she realised she was more interested in dolls than footballs."

ffs

I'm also struggling to believe this is true. If it is, the Daily Mail will pick it up

They already have along with a fair few other newspapers inc the telegraph

At schools, kids should be allowed to be kids. If society imposes rules - girls must wear these clothes, boys can't wear these clothes, then you impose differences. In a sense, schools are part of the bigger problem - so many things are associated with boys / girls.

A child should be able to wear a dress to school and not have to say 'I am trans' to be allowed to do that. They should be able to have a name they like without having to say they are a boy.

But society has 'rules'. Breaking those rules comes with consequences. One way to 'break them' is to say you are trans.

This isn't in Scotland. I'm trying to find a link to the video.

God how terrible a video teaching our children to be tolerant and kind. How awful.

What nonsense. Children don't just change sex because they like pink. It's a long process.
Look up on the subject, learn about it. But I guess hating people different to you makes you feel powerful.

Boys love to play with dolls, buggies and dressing dolls as much as girls do and girls arent averse to cars and trucks either

But if a boy wanted to wear the clothes traditionally associated with girls at school, he couldn't do that. Society says NO. But society says it's ok to do that IF you say you are trans.

.

If this is real, it has just gone too far now. I have every sympathy for trans adults who genuinely feel that they are born in the wrong body and have hormone treatment and surgery but now it seems that every Tom, Dick and Harry announces that from now on that they are to be known as Tracey, Rachel and Harriet for what appears to solely because they like pink, dresses and fluffy things better than trains and playing in the mud.

Why can’t people see that the real problem if they want to campaign about an injustice, is that society generally does not deem it acceptable for men and boys to openly like anything considered to be ‘girly’. They are not trans women, they are men that like different things to some other men.

I’m glad this shit wasn’t around when I was growing up. I played with Meccano, bikes and chemistry sets and preferred jeans and trainers to skirts. I wasn’t a trans boy and any idea that I was would have probably been distressing and confusing for me and led to being bullied even more than I was.

People with penises are men/boys and people with vaginas are women/girls and either one can dress how they like and like what they like.

foodtime - children can be tolerant and kind without being told that because a boy has always wanted to play with girls toys and likes to wear dresses that they are actually a girl.

At 4 children don't have a fully formed sense of self. Educate yourself on child development.

Children don't just change sex because they like pink. It's a long process.

I think you will find it is not a long process.And it can be as simple as liking pink and not liking football.

This four year old can't have had a very long lead up to this decision.

I teach my children to be tolerant and kind of all differences. I don't tell them that they MUST be labelled a certain way because a group of adults with a very specific agenda say that they must.

foodtime if it was just a video telling children to be kind and tolerant that would be great, no problems. It's the fact that it seems to also be pushing this ridiculous idea that there are boys and girls things/toys/clothes etc, and that it's possible to have a "girl" brain or a "boy" brain and to be born in the wrong body. Which is an ideology, not fact.

Kindness and tolerance is nothing like "there is boy stuff and girl stuff"

I could quite believe that some parents would change the gender of their child that young.

I'm interested as to how many 4 year olds are in school at this point in the year. Even with the Scottish system the cut off point is the end of February so there can't be many of them.

Also, this is utter shite.

I would be furious too, and even putting my opinions on the whole trans movement/agenda, the school has no right to show such a video to the children without parental consent. The school has as much right imo to show this video as they do a religious one telling them that if they don't believe in a specific religion they're going to hell.

was it this

In England and Wales, there will be plenty of 4 year olds in reception. The cut off is 31st August so some won't be 5 until they are just about to start y1

I have a major issue with the fact that those children have been told that liking pink and dressed means you are girl.
This in itself is probably against gender equality anyway. And I would imagine the last thing that the school wants to or should teach the children.

I can also imagine that dealing with that must be very hard for the school. They could have told the other parents before hand but they would have had to deal with an strong opposition (see ther reaction afterwards) which would then leave them with not a lot the could do to prepare the children to the change in the child fromX to Y.

This transitioning at such a young age is crazy though. Poor child.

shadow. Do you think there could be extra info that school and the child's parents haven't told people.....like the child's gender was in question from birth and they've finally chosen the gender they have?
They're not necessarily going to discuss hospital appointments, counselling sessions etc with school parents.

Perhaps this isn't just a whim they've decided on.