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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should they have offered to have washed clothes with vomit on?

210 replies

MrsSnow · 19/02/2017 20:16

We went to see the inlaws. For various reasons we don't stay with them however relations are good and they seem to genuinely love DS (age 1).
We didn't stay in their town, but 15 mins away and about 5 mins away from SILs.

DS was horrendously sick when we arrived In our hotel bedroom. Both our clothes and the surrounding area were covered in vomit. So much so we had to buy new clothes as the handwashed ones didn't dry.

We spoke to MIL at various points in the day namely to ensure that we went to the dinner (in a restaurant in the town where we were staying). We did and DS vomitted there too a few times leaving us both drentched in vomit again.

Since coming home I've been thinking it would have been nice if MIL or even SILs had offered to have washed our clothes or even just DS's or even when we saw them this afternoon said something along the lines of " you could have washed your clothes here, we have a washing machine and a dryer". As it was they didn't offer and I didn't ask. It has got me thinking if IABU to at least hope they would offer? FWIW I would have offered.

OP posts:
2cats2many · 19/02/2017 20:27

I consider myself to be a pretty kind and generous person, but it would never have occurred to me to offer to wash your clothes.

Crunchymum · 19/02/2017 20:27

As an emetophobe threads like this make me go cold.

Taking a sick child out? Then letting g child be sick a few times in the restaurant. Fuck me.

Sorry I can't get beyond that to be honest.

Original poster
MrsSnow · 19/02/2017 20:29

Re females only doing laundry - FIL lives on otherside of country, didn't see BILs.

Re taking sick son out. We didn't want to, MIL insisted that we did else tantrums. There was also 24 hours between the two vomiting episodes.

OP posts:
circleSoflife · 19/02/2017 20:29

RV?

bumsexatthebingo · 19/02/2017 20:30

I'm not an emetophobe but I'm struggling with aibu this evening - this thread and the pool one.
YWBU to take the child out to dinner when he was vomitting. That is all.

bumsexatthebingo · 19/02/2017 20:30

I would have let MIL have a tantrum tbh.

Crunchymum · 19/02/2017 20:31

So I assume child has been just dandy in between his seas of vomit that have drenched everyone? Confused

GallivantingWildebeest · 19/02/2017 20:32

Omg. Yabvvvvvvu. Taking a sick child out?? There's a 48 hour rule for a fucking reason. Mil insisted? Put on your big girl pants and say no, he's contagious. FFS.

I wouldn't wash someone else's puked on clothes either.

FlyWaxSleepRepeat · 19/02/2017 20:32

So not upsetting your MIL is more important to you than looking after (quarantining) your sick child?

Bet all the other diners and staff in the restaurant were delighted with you.

F1GI · 19/02/2017 20:33

I would have rinsed the clothes in the hotel and not gone out to the meal. You could have sent DH on his own?
TBH, no I wouldn't have offered to wash clothing covered in vomit. I wouldn't want to catch anything from it. Kids clothes are just presumably cheap and will be outgrown anyway within weeks, you could even have binned them if rinsing wasn't enough.

ceeveebee · 19/02/2017 20:33

You really should not have taken a puking child to a restaurant - that's pretty selfish of you.

Char22thom · 19/02/2017 20:34

I can imagine you feel bombarded OP, but I have to say MILs need to see you/go for dinner was not important once your lo was unwell. Even with 24hrs between, someone who vomitted 24hrs ago is not well enough to be out, never mind around food in a restaurant, as was proven because your lo was then sick again, there should be 48hrs at least X

VintagePerfumista · 19/02/2017 20:35

So the timeline is a bit different from the OP?

Should MIL only have offered to wash the clothes she witnessed being sicked on, or the ones you'd already replaced by buying new ones?

I agree with others tbh. Your own U radar is so off, you're best off not judging others. I'd have complained about you if I'd been in the restaurant.

wonkylegs · 19/02/2017 20:35

I have a vomiting child, baby and husband (and am waiting for my turn 😳) thanks to somebody who didn't want to deal with tantrums and took a clearly ill child out to the activity we did on Friday because as the mum put it she 'didn't want to deal with the fall out' . I so grateful that they decided to share the bug with us as I obviously wanted to spend half term mopping up sick!

ReginaGeorgeinSheepsClothing · 19/02/2017 20:37

Hoping I've missed you saying and the vomiting at the restaurant was in the loos?!! Not emetephobe(sp?) either, but if it was at the table- poor other diners and staff who had to clear it up!

Original poster
MrsSnow · 19/02/2017 20:37

Post the first vomit, everyone kept on saying to me that babies do vomit and that its normal and that we should carry on. So I do accept we should have quarantined ourselves in the hotel room BUT how far would you take it? Would you miss train/plane/bus home?

OP posts:
ChicRock · 19/02/2017 20:38

If I was in a restaurant and on the table next to me was a sick child who vomited "a few times" and "drenched" both parents in vomit, I'd get up and leave, mid meal.

Fucking disgusting.

You shouldn't have been there in the first place, and should have left the first time he vomited in the restaurant.

NoWittyNamesAvailable · 19/02/2017 20:39

You should never have gone with a sick child. I would have let mil have her tantrum. Someone attended my sons christening within the 48 hours of having a stomach bug. Out of 140 guests 86 of them ended up with it, including my 5 week old son, myself, my partnerand a vulnerable great aunt who ended up in hospital with severe dehydration. This is what happens when people don't think!

AcrossthePond55 · 19/02/2017 20:39

I'd choose sick child over MiL tantrum any day!

FWIW, yes, I would have offered you the use of my machines.

Were there laundry facilities or cleaning services offered at the hotel? Surely when you called housekeeping about new linen or cleaning the vomit filled room you could have asked?

Original poster
MrsSnow · 19/02/2017 20:39

Vomit in restaurant happened in the between the set of two doors as we entered. As I was holding him the bulk was on me. I had spare clothes so we were able to change and clean the area.

OP posts:
VintagePerfumista · 19/02/2017 20:40

Deciding or not whether to take a plane is a bit different to nipping down Pizza Hut with the in-laws.

bumsexatthebingo · 19/02/2017 20:40

They might bring up some milk (though not usually at that age so much) but it's not normal for 1 yr olds to be full on vomiting unless they have some condition where it is a regular thing.
I would risk travelling home by car if I had to but eating out at a restaurant isn't essential is it?

StarUtopia · 19/02/2017 20:41

So not upsetting your MIL is more important to you than looking after (quarantining) your sick child?

This. My sick child would have been my priority. I wouldn't have gone out full stop.

ChicRock · 19/02/2017 20:41

And you immediately left and went back to your hotel?

CactusFred · 19/02/2017 20:41

Why should they offer?! Maybe they don't want to catch the bug! Much like the people in the restaurant. How selfish!

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