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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my in-laws are over reacting?

207 replies

Snugglepalace · 13/02/2017 20:23

My dc (11yr old ds & 8 yr old dd) stay over at my in-laws once a week during the school hols, so that's roughly 10 times a year.
They have a 2 bed house and up till 6 months ago dc slept together in their spare room, however in laws now make dd sleep on the floor in the living room which she hates, she says it's uncomfortable.
So I asked them today if the kids can share the room and they got quite angry with me and said no it's not right at their age!!
AIBU to think that's a bit over the top for a sleep over just 10-12 times a year?

OP posts:
Alpies · 14/02/2017 18:32

In all seriousness, why have u allowed your kids to have sleepovers? I would understand visiting them for a few hrs, but letting them stay overnight in a hours with such weird factors is odd.

OnlyOpenMouthToChangeFeet · 14/02/2017 18:45

If your DC sleep over again, send them both with a pen. Then if they use more than 1 or 2 sheets, tell them to write on next sheet
'IOU (x amount) sheets of toilet paper'

Would love to see PIL's response to that! Grin

Manijo · 14/02/2017 18:50

my two are 16 and 23 and still happy to share a room if they have too but older DD does now draw the line at bed sharing because DB smells Grin

starfishmummy · 14/02/2017 19:17

Come on. We have to know about the heating now!!!

KathyBeale · 14/02/2017 19:30

I am 43 and my brother is 39 and I would share a room with him if I (really) had to. And if it was just for one night. Though I would draw the line at sharing a bed because he is stinky.

I think it's weird to make an issue of it and I definitely think no more sleepovers until it is resolved.

KathyBeale · 14/02/2017 19:31

Ha! Just read Manijo's post. Clearly her DD is a woman after my own heart.

Unescorted · 14/02/2017 19:45

Maybe they have to declare what they are going to do before going to the loo.... a bit like shit whist.

Can I have a P please nana.....

woodhill · 15/02/2017 09:00

Are they stingy with food too OP? Are they badly off?

PatsyMount · 15/02/2017 09:47

Am i the only one who has trialled this nonsense in the last 24 hours on the back of this thread? There is no way these toilet roll rations are enough for me! Blush

HappyFlappy · 15/02/2017 09:52

No Patsy - I knew without any doubt that one square (!) of toilet roll was not enough to cope with the Niagara of wee that I unleash.

And as for the "other end" . . . . Confused

ShelaghTurner · 15/02/2017 10:05

If I send my kids round to them will they educate them in toilet roll frugality? We fanny about with use at least a roll a day. DD2 thinks she's the Andrex puppy Hmm

As for the sleeping thing, they're crackers. If the kids don't mind sharing then there's no problem. I shared a hotel room with my brother for a few nights when we were 34 and 30. We survived the experience and actually had a good laugh.

ItsNachoCheese · 15/02/2017 10:25

Another wanting to know about the heating... Grin

PatsyMount · 15/02/2017 10:30

Grin happyflappy I knew too but just had to have a go!!

limitedperiodonly · 15/02/2017 10:47

My friend's mum had a rule about pooing only in the downstairs loo. I used the upstairs one and she hammered on the door demanding to know what I was doing.

ShelaghTurner · 15/02/2017 10:56

Pats! 👋🏻

rainbowstardrops · 15/02/2017 11:14

Heating you say? Come on, you just know you have to spill the beans on that one! Grin
Seriously though, if my DD was crying not to go then I'd probably stop the overnight stays. It sounds completely joyless.

EdgeofSeventeen · 15/02/2017 13:28

I have had to namechange as i suspect my SIL could be on here! Anyway, she and I were perplexed when we visited FIL and his DW's house, we were sat down and had the following explained to us

After visiting the downstairs loo, we have to walk through 3 rooms to get to the utility room to wash our hands, we then have to walk back to the downstairs loo to dry our hands on the towel that is placed in that room. We cannot dry our hands on a teatowel or any other towel that we pass on the way as that is unhygenic. Confused We tried to point out that it is already unhygenic putting our poo-covered hands on various door handles on the way to washing our hands but we were met with Hmm

SIL and i looked at eachother like this Shock Hmm Confused

We try not to visit often as our DCs totally flout the rules!! Grin

Original poster
Snugglepalace · 16/02/2017 13:41

The heating? basically =no heating, it can go on for an hours boost if not then wear extra clothing! When I visit, my coat does not come off from end Sept-Apr!!

OP posts:
Alpies · 16/02/2017 13:48

So y on earth do u let your kids stay there? I'm sure social services might be interested in the condition ur kids have to live in when they stay there.

Gillian1980 · 16/02/2017 13:50

They're being weird.

My brother and I shared a room at our grandparents right up until late teens !
We'd still share a room now in our 30s if we needed to.

BertrandRussell · 16/02/2017 13:58

"I'm sure social services might be interested in the condition ur kids have to live in when they stay there."

I am absolutely certain they would not be!

I agree, they shouldn't have to stay if they don't want to. But there are lots of mumsnetters who think that different sex children should not share a room after toddlerdom.They are, in general, bonkers. But there are a lot of them.

Willow2016 · 16/02/2017 14:38

Alpies
Why on earth would SS be interested?

AcrossthePond55 · 16/02/2017 14:50

I feel for your DC. I have such wonderful memories of sleeping with two of my cousins at our grandparents. In the summer we'd all sleep together in the feather bed in the 'sleeping porch' (do you have those in the UK?) and in the winter we were privileged enough to sleep in the naice bed in the 'front bedroom' under a pile of quilts Gramma made herself.

Staying at one's grandparents should be something a grandchild looks forward to as a time to be a bit spoilt and to eat gramma's good cooking!

Notrevealingmyidentity · 16/02/2017 15:03

I wouldn't send them if they weren't being allowed to clean themselves properly after using the toilet. That's just revolting.

I would tell them why as well.

BertrandRussell · 16/02/2017 15:11

If they still want to go, just send them with some extra loo roll!