To be a tiny bit pissed off they stole my only bit of me time

[Babyiwantabump]

Eldest in play group .

Youngest was napping.

Finally sat my bum on the sofa with a hot cup of tea and a bit of the Netflix.

PIL turn up
No phone call before - I explain that eldest at playgroup youngest asleep upstairs it's just me . They still come in . Then I have to run around making them drinks and focusing on them!

They ruined my me time!!

AIBU?

[FannyDeFuzz]

Yanbu. Next time pull the blinds down, and lock the door

I also have very limited time on my own, and I really need it for my own mental health to be honest. When something ruins it I get so stressed and angry because it's gone for another week

[kayleighnotts]

I've had the piss taken out of me by people because i said can you give me a text or phone call to let me know if you want to come round because i don't like it when people turn up unannounced. They said alright then i will ring or text for an appointment to see you. I hate it when i relax or whatever and then all of a sudden someone is knocking on my door ruining my me time plans

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

YNBU. I despise unannounced visitors. Not even my own mum used to turn up announced.
I just don't answer the door to people.
I hate my space being invaded.

[SapphireStrange]

Really rude. Try twitching the curtains peeking next time, if you're expecting a delivery.

And get your DP/DH to tell them to phone in advance from now on.

[S1lentAllTheseYears]

Oh gosh, no that's awful! A bit of peace and quiet is so precious when you have little ones hanging off you 24/7!

As a one off, let it go, but have a plan for if it happens again.

[Babyiwantabump]

I get very very little time to myself so really really need these rare moments .

I feel really pissed off now as it's going to be ages before I get the chance again .

OH thought I was being silly as at least his parents made the effort to come round .

[SapphireStrange]

OH thought I was being silly as at least his parents made the effort to come round

Would he have run round hosting them if he was home when they 'made the effort to come round'? Or would it still have been down to you?

[ThumbWitchesAbroad]

No YANBU. You need a stock of excuses though, if they do it again - "sorry, I was just going to have a bath", "sorry, I'm just cleaning the loos, we've had D&V last night", "Sorry, I've an essay/report to write/phonecall to the council to make" "Sorry, I'm up against it this morning, there's the kettle and could you make me one while you're at it? Thanks"

Or don't let them in again.

[jennifer86]

Omg, I feel your pain, OP! A few weeks ago I was coming down with a cold and hadn't slept well the previous night, generally felt rubbish. DP was at work but PIL decided to come and visit in the middle of the day when DS was napping! I was exhausted, really didn't want to spend that time entertaining and making small talk! Then they buggered off back home again pretty much as soon as DS woke up, so didn't even help or play with him in the afternoon! I was so pissed off, what makes ILs think they can do that?!!

[NapQueen]

I have a lovely arrangement with my postman where if I'm not in napping he drops my parcels at my mums down the street. She is always in! (Wfh)

[QuimReaper]

YABU to be "a tiny bit pissed off" - I'd have been MURDEROUS! What on earth is wrong with people to just barge in like that?

You need to get a "safe place" parcel thing and never ever answer the door again.

[jennifer86]

Yy, Kayleigh, my MIL made the same 'appointment' 'joke'! Infuriating!!

[AristotlesTrousers]

YANBU OP.

Me time is v. precious. Really inconsiderate of your PIL. Hope you get a break soon!

[gandalf456]

I remember getting like that. I always felt slightly U but still, I hear you. I think I'd gave peaked and ignored the door

[SapphireStrange]

Thumb, there's no need for the 'sorry's in those examples!

[S1lentAllTheseYears]

Oh yeah, I am sure he would have been delighted if he'd just got his bum down for an hour and your parents turned up!

[MistyMinge]

YANBU I'd be annoyed too. FIL has a habit of just turning up on the days I don't work. I'll look up at his face is peering through the living room window. It's always when I'm in the middle of something or trying to have quiet time before youngest DC nap. I find it hard to hide the annoyance in my expression. Nowadays I just carry on with whatever it was I was doing. I'm not retired, I don't have unlimited time.

If they do it again. Say you're about to head out and in future probably better to call ahead so they dont have a wasted journey.

[eddiemairswife]

What strange folk there seem to be around. Is it only on here that people won't open the door or answer the phone unless they know who it is? When did this concept of 'me time' come into being? Surely making a cup of tea and chatting to your in-laws is not too much hard work.

[gandalf456]

Well. If you're tired you want time to switch off rather than make small talk with the inlaws. Not sure if I'd had found it relaxing

[UnexplainedOnHerCollar]

I understand OP, I treasure those times!

I'm bad at telling people I can't do something/see them because it's my only bit of time for myself, even though it's perfectly reasonable, I worry it will sound rude or they'll try to persuade me. But I have started saying "Oh no I'm not free sorry. I've got an appointment."* Most people won't pry about this, they just accept it.

• An appoint with myself, a cappuccino and Grazia, but they don't have to know that.

[FaFoutis]

YANBU.
I would not have let them in. Being alone is necessary for my sanity.
Close the curtains and don't answer the door in future.

[Babyiwantabump]

eddie but I was hosting them - so having got rid of two children I basically had two more to Entertain! I couldn't have just sat there watching my program and ignored them .

And Navy it wouldn't have been so bad if they had rang ahead or came at a time when the children were here and awake!

[Quintessing]

Next time, let them mind the baby while you get the oldest from playgroup. I am sure they wont come again at that time....