AIBU to take my baby girl out of nursery after seeing her 'key person' push a crying baby twice?

[Snf13]

My little girl is 10 months and started nursery only a month ago! She had a hard time getting settled and I sometimes found her shaking and in tears when I was coming to get her in the evening. Something that had never happened before. She always was a happy baby!
I put it down to her not being used to new people, other babies, noise, a different routine etc.. but something strange was that my girl was friendly and holding her arms to other staff members except her key person at nursery. I found this woman quite rude and cold and she was making me uncomfortable but I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt.
So, after a month, my LO was finally getting settled, but...this morning when I brought her to nursery, I caught the care giver red handed: she was sitting on the floor staring at a crying baby (8 months old) and she pushed him quite violently with her hand, he fell backwards and then found his balance back sitting, but started screaming (more of being scared than in pain I think) and she pushed him again! She had no compassion at all, and just looked like she just didn't care/was annoyed at his crying! It lasted a few seconds and then she saw me. She wasn't even apologetic or flustered. She just stood up and started getting the breakfast ready. She even had some sort of defiant look in my direction and didn't say Hello or Good morning as she usually does! She just shouted at another staff member to pick my daughter up from my arms! It was like she was pissed off I had caught her!
So I debated all day about what to do and felt sick in my stomach thinking she might be abusive to other kids, and my LO, and tonight, I said that my girl was not going to come back.
When she asked why, I said that I was looking for a new nursery ( I didn't want to confront her as she scared me) and she didn't probe more. It was obvious that she knew why I was taking my girl out, and the only thing she said was: 'You know you have to mention it 4 weeks in advance and we'll keep your payment for February?'
She didn't even fake she was going to miss my LO (she fakes 'loving her' and 'her being so cute' every evening)
I took my girl and said I was going to come and pick her things tomorrow. I intend to come and report the incident to the nursery's director at the same time. However I am conscious that there was no one else who saw this woman's behaviour and it is her word against mine!

Sorry for the long email, so all in all, my questions are:

1. AIBU to take my LO (who just settled in) out of this nursery by fear she might not be cared for properly (or abused)?
2. AIBU to report this incident/this woman to the director?
3. Should I inform social services or is it too much?

Thanks for your advice/help!

The whole thing sounds mental. Op, you live three hours away from your workplace?? You seriously make a six hour round trip each day? I don't believe a word of it

Where does the OP say she lives 3 hours away from work?!?!

I think you should immediately inform the director of the nursery and ask it the matter will be referred to child protection. I'm guessing that they would need to hold an internal enquiry first, suspending the key worker and then involve outside agencies.
If you are not satisfied with how it is being handled then you can go straight to the child protection team (MASH) - there should be information how to do this available at your nursery.
If you contact Ofsted it will trigger an inspection but this will probably not be immediate. You do need to allow the nursery to take acton first though, as they can't be held at fault if they are not aware of the situation

just hope she wasn't abused I cannot believe what I'm reading I would rather end up jobless and homeless than leave my baby in the care of someone I witnessed abuse a baby

OP mentions the 3hr commute at Mon 30-Jan-17 22:50:20

Train, bus and then walk.

Strongmummy - quote from OPS earlier post -

"Snf13

olliplimsoles and disabrie22: I was sick all day. I had absolutely no choice but leave her in today. I live 3 hours away from nursery (which is near my office) I am a single mum and I have no family here. I tried to rationalise it all day thinking I must be dramatising and it was just a small push.. but it clearly wasn't. There is no way I am putting my LO back there, but I am stuck though: I have no childcare arrangement and need to work FT to provide. Fortunately (if you can say so) a friend of mine just lost his job and is happy to take care of baby this week. I need a new nursery/childminder for Monday!!"

Op after seeing that, you call in the manager and tell her what you saw, go straight home with your baby, call in sick or there has been something happen, and then report to Ofstead, and NSPCC. Look for other nurseries near you. Noway would I have left my precious baby in the hands of an abuser.

Hi all, I just spoke to the nursery manager. She was upset and told me to put everything I saw in writing so that she could do something about it. She mentioned that she would 'remove this person from the nursery'. She mentioned she will deal with this and call me later on today.
I will keep you posted

Thanks. Yes, sorry OP, but this isn't stacking up now

"ccetsw

YOU ABSOLUTELY MUST REPORT TO SOCIAL SERVICES

The manager could do nothing and cover it up.

Goodness knows what else she is doing?"

Agreed, totally. What you saw, OP, is abuse plain and simple. Take it out of their hands and report this woman to Social Services.

You live 3 hours away from nursery?! What is the provision if your LO becomes ill? For example, if DS gets a temp at nursery and it doesn't go down after a dose of calpol we have to pick him up within the hour!

What you have described is absolutely despicable - so please report it ASAP. I'm not sure what the delay for doing so is!

I hope you find much more suitable and closer to home childcare very soon for both your sakes.

Report her to her employers and to the local council child services. This person should be nowhere near children. Also take your DD away and tell anyone interested what you saw.

"Floggingmolly

The whole thing sounds mental. Op, you live three hours away from your workplace?? You seriously make a six hour round trip each day? I don't believe a word of it hmm"

Damn. Suckered in...

Could 3 hours not mean. 90 minutes there and 90 minutes back.

I wouldn't have left my child that day and I would've not been able to have helped myself from confronting her as I would've felt like pushing her!

Stuff like this needs reporting as years down the line you could hear something on the news that you could've helped to prevent.

No one in their right mind would witness an assault on a 8 month old baby, do nothing and then still leave their own child with them?? This was also your childs key worker?
6 hour commute with a 10 month old baby! I think you are the one that needs reporting to be honest.

tatty1010 100% agree. Sadly people like this do exist which is why I'm going to be a sahm

Could 3 hours not mean. 90 minutes there and 90 minutes back.

No, the OP specifically says "3 hours in the morning and 3 hours in the evening".

Ywbu to leave your child there after seeing this! She assaulted a baby, report to the police and her manager.

Do not trust the nursery to deal with this. Like ppl have said, report to ofsted, Nspcc and social services. Nursery has the interest in keeping other parents 'happy' and money rolling in and thus they cannot be fully trusted to deal with this properly!

Way to go berating a mother for trying to do the best for her baby. What is she supposed to do, give up her job and live off benefits? She's already said she's trying to find a new job closer to home.

OP could you rent out your mortgaged property to cover the mortgage payments and then rent somewhere closer to work to cut down on the commute?

I agree with others btw, make sure you report this to any officials you can, do not think that the creche will sort this out by themselves.

6 hours a day travel. A full time job.
A baby to run around after. We also don't know baby's sleep pattern.
Jesus on a rollercoaster. She must be super fucking human.

No January she is supposed to call in sick or explain the situation to her manager. It is not ok to leave a baby with someone who is most likely abusing them!!

No babyspider. RTFT - OP stated 30 mins walk, 1 hour bus, 1 hour train and another 30 mins walk. Each way.

No one in their right mind would witness an assault on a 8 month old baby, do nothing and then still leave their own child with them

I agree. If you're for real, OP, then you need to seriously rethink your attitude as well. I feel physically sick reading this along with the others who have said the same, and very grateful that I don't have to work.