AIBU to take my baby girl out of nursery after seeing her 'key person' push a crying baby twice?

[Snf13]

My little girl is 10 months and started nursery only a month ago! She had a hard time getting settled and I sometimes found her shaking and in tears when I was coming to get her in the evening. Something that had never happened before. She always was a happy baby!
I put it down to her not being used to new people, other babies, noise, a different routine etc.. but something strange was that my girl was friendly and holding her arms to other staff members except her key person at nursery. I found this woman quite rude and cold and she was making me uncomfortable but I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt.
So, after a month, my LO was finally getting settled, but...this morning when I brought her to nursery, I caught the care giver red handed: she was sitting on the floor staring at a crying baby (8 months old) and she pushed him quite violently with her hand, he fell backwards and then found his balance back sitting, but started screaming (more of being scared than in pain I think) and she pushed him again! She had no compassion at all, and just looked like she just didn't care/was annoyed at his crying! It lasted a few seconds and then she saw me. She wasn't even apologetic or flustered. She just stood up and started getting the breakfast ready. She even had some sort of defiant look in my direction and didn't say Hello or Good morning as she usually does! She just shouted at another staff member to pick my daughter up from my arms! It was like she was pissed off I had caught her!
So I debated all day about what to do and felt sick in my stomach thinking she might be abusive to other kids, and my LO, and tonight, I said that my girl was not going to come back.
When she asked why, I said that I was looking for a new nursery ( I didn't want to confront her as she scared me) and she didn't probe more. It was obvious that she knew why I was taking my girl out, and the only thing she said was: 'You know you have to mention it 4 weeks in advance and we'll keep your payment for February?'
She didn't even fake she was going to miss my LO (she fakes 'loving her' and 'her being so cute' every evening)
I took my girl and said I was going to come and pick her things tomorrow. I intend to come and report the incident to the nursery's director at the same time. However I am conscious that there was no one else who saw this woman's behaviour and it is her word against mine!

Sorry for the long email, so all in all, my questions are:

1. AIBU to take my LO (who just settled in) out of this nursery by fear she might not be cared for properly (or abused)?
2. AIBU to report this incident/this woman to the director?
3. Should I inform social services or is it too much?

Thanks for your advice/help!

BackforGood: she is the most senior person at nursery, and I think she is the one 'in charge' when the director/manager aren't there. This is another thing that worries me about having my word against hers!
And yes, I went to work! I had NO choice! I couldn't bring my girl to the office. I couldn't NOT go to work (my LO was sick last week and I missed a few days at work already) I can't be in trouble at work. Believe me, I feel very guilty about it. I was sick all day and couldn't eat. I left as soon as I could and literally ran to pick her up! I know just hope she wasn't abused.

You are not to give them a penny either.

Thanks PrettySunFlowers. I will.

You are not to give them a penny either

If you get into a financial arguement with them before a complaint is resolved you hand them a arguement against your complaint.

"She is making it up due to a disagreement over her bill" it happens lots

Totally report it.

Hats off to you for that commute. I can't imagine how hard it is. With a baby in toe.

Honestly I think it would drive me loopy after two days. Just wow

Never ever ever the benefit of doubt when it's about my baby! must be no doubts or uncertainties regarding my DC

Let us know what gets said today when you speak to the nursery z

I would report to ofsted and the manager and owners. why on earth aren't you doing so? Ignoring child abuse us unforgivable. Shame on you if you allow this to go ignored

Yes you must inform ofsted otherwise nursery may do nothing

I have read your posts, and the replies, I think you realise you should have gone to the manager straight away after witnessing that abuse! This person should not be working with children, if she makes you feel scared and intimidated, how do you think she makes very young children, unable to defend themselves feel! Your dds behaviour at going to nursery, speaks volumes, I wonder what this woman did to her!

Thoroughly confused that you didn't say something to this woman at the time. If I'd seen it happen I'd have gone mad and called the manager immediately. I wouldn't have left my child there. We all deal with things differently and hindsight is a wonderful thing of course. But yes, report to nursery manager and OFSTED immediately.

You need to be contacting Ofstead and NSPCC, if you haven't witnessed that abuse it would carry on. You owe it to the other parents who do not know that this woman is abusive, to report her!

Remember you are PAYING them. You are the client, they are the service provider. You keep saying it's her word against mine. You're not at school!!!!! You have the upper hand already

Have you reported it yet OP?

Hope you've reported it OP!

Omg this is awful. On just so many levels. I really hope you report it not just to the nursery but to ofsted, the council, whoever necessary. I mean if it was the other way and another parent had witnessed this you'd want to know. You have a duty to all those children take sure this woman is not allowed near them. I'm sorry you're going through this, it must be awful.

I was a student at a nursery when I was doing my cache training. The head of the toddlers room was absolutely awful. She clearly didn't even like children. The final straw for me was seeing her stand back and refuse to break up a fight because the one who was coming off worse (having his head slammed into the floor by another child who was kneeling on his chest) was a child she said, and I quote "I fucking hate every fucking bone in that child's body, he deserves it". Of course I pulled the child off but I also left the building, went home and called Ofsted.

Saw her a few months later in a lift in a car park. She pushed herself into the corner of the lift, trying to make herself as small as possible, practically had her face pushed into the corner. Why? Because child abusers are shit bag cowards who won't stand up to people their own size.

no wonder your Dd dosnt want to stay there!you should have called her out on it right away and asked to see the manager.
I hope you haven't paid for her to traumatise your baby and I'd be telling the other mother wat you saw too.
And I wouldn't have left my baby there after seeing that I can tell you. No way.
Surly other staff must know what this carer is like?
You have to report her befor she harms a child physically and emotionally,

When my DS was 3 and at nursery he had a bit of a temper tantrum and was told by a staff member that "if he wanted to behave like a baby then he could" He was then put in a nappy and put back in the baby room.
The staff member who did this actually told my husband and she didn't see anything wrong in it. She then changed her mind the next day after i reported it to the manager apparently he wasn't put back in a nappy but was told he would be if he continued being a baby- even that is bad in itself- however what she didn't realise was that they had left the nappy on him and I had seen it.
The manager said this girl was now under an official warning but we still moved our son to a diff nursery and reported her to ofsted.

I hope you have managed to speak to the nursery manager/director this morning- what you witnessed should never ever be allowed to happen again

YOU ABSOLUTELY MUST REPORT TO SOCIAL SERVICES

The manager could do nothing and cover it up.

Goodness knows what else she is doing?

Really feel for you. Don't feel guilty. Hope you have managed to report things.
It may well be there have been suspicions and what's happened to you baby is he final straw.

I think cctv in nurseries should be compulsory, some people should not be working with children!! I used to work in a nursery as a trainee and some of the behaviour from the nursery nurses was just wrong, luckily they left the job. please do report what you saw OP, and it's awful you had to witness such a thing. I made complaints to the management which resulted in one member of staff losing her job, report to the management and if that doesn't work go to ofsted.

Hi op. Please speak to your employer about this hr if possible. If they know the gravity of the situation and what's happened I would have thought they might offer you some short term flexi or leave or something.

You witnessed someone assault a baby and you've done nothing?

Wow.

Definitely tell the other parents! You say the probably like and trust the nursery, but what if they're worried like you were, noticing the baby being more upset than normal etc? Imagine if they'd seen your child get shoved and said nothing! Also you might have more credence if they have worries/complaints too. It might help.