To be so irritated by people that do things so sllloooooowwwwllllyyyy

[ItsLikeRainOnYourWeddingDay]

Inspired by the faffing thread.

AIBU?? Unless you have a medical reason obviously.

Today my dh got the toddler ready. It usually takes me 30 mins and in that time I can easily:

Make him breakfast
Make my own breakfast and eat it
Dress him
Empty dishwasher
Pack bag for nursery
Put load in washing machine
Brush his teeth
Put his shoes and coat on

In an hour my dh didn't even manage half of that. He wasn't even faffing. He just does things so slowly. Does my head in.

DH drives me mad when he makes a sandwich. He gets butter on the bread and dabs it. dab dab dab. Then a bit more. And dab dab dab. JUST BLOODY SPREAD IT

I have this at work. Some of the women takes ages at the salad bar Chatting to each other as if they have all the time in the world and don't see the 15 people in the queue behind them. Just pick your salad and chat after!

I have a nanny who literally takes about half an hour to get ready to leave the house - just putting shoes and a coat on. By this point the baby is screaming and all hot and bothered in the pram. Every time I tell her to get herself ready first before putting baby in - she never does it! I don't think she's aware at how long she's taking.

Agreed, I hate faffing. Faffing means less time for sleeping.

My best friend is totally useless. It takes her a minimum of two hours to just dress 2 children and leave the house. I get so fucked off waiting around for her all the time.

Haha My DH is a bit like this. To be fair to him, he could easily manage your list in an hour, but probably not half an hour.

I have no idea why it takes him so long to do some things. he's a very organised and 'active' person, not lazy at all. I've watched him do tasks that take him twice as long as it takes me, yet I can't actually figure out what makes him slower. It's bizarre!

There is definitely a difference between doing things at a snails pace and faffing. I don't know which irritates me more

DF faff with housework, I have to leave the room. Why would you want to spend so much time on it? WhyWhyWhy????

I am a slow person!
I never manage to take a shower in less than 30min from getting undressed to getting dressed.
I can't make the DC eat in less than 1h.
I need 20min to get me and 2 3yo out of the house.
The list goes on...

I am not doing it on purpose, I try to be quicker sometimes but it doesn't really work.

An hour to eat! Are they in school?

I worked with a proper slowpoke. Luckily, she was really lovely and brilliant to be around, otherwise I would have been even more irritated at doing 2/3 of our jobs (we were in the same role, same salary, same weekly hours).

Some many years ago I was waiting in a till queue in Sainsburys, about 3 people back, getting more and more enraged as the older lady at the front faffed about asking the amount, fiddling with her purse, spilling the contents, counting out the exact change, asking again for the amount, fiddling with her bag, dropping her purse etc etc...

And then she turned round and it was my Granny

Went to a friends for dinner last night, and it took her 15 minutes just to put some rice on to cook. and that doesn't include cooking time. It was selecting the right pan, choosing which rice, slowly rinsing it, gently spooning into the pan (why?), boiling the kettle....all at snails pace. I was so infuriated. JUST COOK THE FUCKING RICE!

My DH! in fact we had an argument just yesterday about it.

He insists on making elaborate breakfasts for DD... but does things one at a time. So it starts at 7 ends at 9 😐. He makes porridge... which she never eats.. then banana pancakes... she eats those... then eggs. He then eats porridge... makes coffee and sits around for the next 30 mins doing nothing. Then goes be makes himself more pancakes... sausage... scramble and toast.

It was a holiday so we thought we'd try to get out the house. He then has to poo before the shower... wash hands.. clean his teeth... then shower. Than saunters around in his pants for the next hour trying to find clothes 🙄. We never left the house... as it just got too hot 42 degrees...

He doesn't understand the concept of multitasking... unless it's work related. It's also the same when he cooks... we never eat on time.

He also doesn't realise that this is what he does... he thinks it surely doesn't take him that long.

balloonslayer
OMFG The bastard dab dab dab !
I've been with my dabber for nearly 50 years.
Whether cleaning,spreading or even in the early days petting though managed to knock that out of him
Is there a correct name for being dabbed to death? If so watch this space.
I'm old now so a SHL could find some mitigating circumstances to limit jail time. .
I think it's honeydragon who's DH is spoony fucker well, mine's dabby fucker.

My exMIL can't leave the house. She says she is going to go and then there is a good 20 minutes while you have to stand up, smiling, watching her pick things up and put things down. It drives me nuts. Despite taking so long over it, she always leaves something behind.

DH is a faffer but not in the sense that he's slow to perform tasks, more that he fannies about before he starts them. I bloody hate going out anywhere with him because no matter how many times he is reminded of when we need to leave the house, he will sit around scratching his nuts until the last possible moment. Then it's a mad dash to get ready while I sit around with my coat on, listening to him screech that he can't find his phone/wallet/left shoe

MrNC is like this. His entire family can faff for England (except nice BIL) and to be fair he's better than most of them, because if I tell him when he has to be ready for, he will be if it's important.

But if it is just getting kids ready to go to the playground of a weekend, it does my head in. Particularly when he says "Yes, I'm ready, I just need to put my shoes on and go to the toilet and get a bottle of water and..."

No, you aren't fucking ready then!!!

When DP and I are going out, he declares "let's go", so I put my coat and shoes on, get my bag ready, check I have spare carrier bags, get my keys sorted, etc... In the meantime DP is doing god knows what, faffing about tying his shoelaces which will somehow miraculously untie themselves about 15 mins after leaving the house anyway... he'll just be about ready (by which point I'm already starting to lose the will to live), then will declare... "hmmm... perhaps I should go for a wee first, then undoes his coat again and disappears to the bathroom. I normally decide at this point that I might as well sit down and read MN, then when he comes out he says "Well, are we going then?" as if I've been holding him up!

The people that take nine years to select three croissants in the supermarket....

I don't know whether I count as a faffer but I guess I do, I marvel at how much stuff DH can do in the time it takes me to do one thing.

In mitigation I have adhd so that one task is a constant stream of distractions and daydreams. Literally, "Ooh shiny" moments.

I'm pretty slow at things, but DSis and DP are a nightmare.
I think it's often trying to get things perfect and not really thinking the order of what they are doing through. Little things like making a cup of tea, I'd go in, fill the kettle (thinking about how much water I actually need) then get cups, milk, tea bags etc if it's not boiled I do odd jobs until it is. DP and DSis do the same, get the milk, cups, tea bags etc sorted first, fill the kettle right up (often past Max) and then stand and wait.
Same with everything. I can get rather irate with them.

Don't we all hate that fannying about?

Start at 40 seconds.

I'm the other way round. Happy to do things slowly, laid back and find people who constantly zoom around saying "busy busy!" stressful to be with Places where everyone is impatient and in a rush look like someone's pressed fast forward to "always on". Undoubtedly I annoy the fast types though!

Ohhh yes!! I have found the best thread on MN!

I am so busy that my life is like a military operation, always has been so anyone that can't do things fast bug the hell out of me. Luckily my DP is damn good and isn't a faffer or slow person, couldn't cope with that, i'm far too busy to wait around for stuff.

I can shower, get dressed, do makeup, dry & straighten my long hair in less than 30mins, quicker if needed. i know exactly how long it takes to get places and what time i need to leave depending on time of day. I am pro at getting dinner served on time and doing other jobs between jobs etc