To feel sad at how quickly my dc are growing up.

[cookieswirls]

Just checked in on my dd who is 5 and couldn't believe how grown up she looks. I still see her as my baby even though I have 11 month old twins too but I think the past year she has just changed and grown up so much! When I was out earlier I saw a friend who said how much she has grown up and now I'm seeing it too. My twins are also growing rapidly and although I certainly do not want to go through the newborn stage again, looking back it did seem really lovely. I'm sad how quickly life flys by

I feel conflicting emotions on this. My daughter is 12. On the one hand I get a lovely lay in at the weekend, we enjoy shopping together and I can now watch fairly decent films and even have read some of the same books. She is my friend as well as my daughter and good company minus the odd mood swing. The other side is some days she looks like she has the weight of the world on her shoulders and she isn't as carefree as she once was. She cares more about what her peers think and if things go wrong she gets stressed in a that she wouldn't of a few years ago. I think I appreciate each stage best I can. A relative lost their child at half the age my daughter is now and it really makes me see that it is a wonderful to see a child grow. I still get some nostalgia moments though of course and time does fly scarily fast.

I think YABU.
Its wonderful to see them grow and achieve.
Don't you remember how exciting it was when they said their first word /took their first step/ smiled for the first time/ waved for the first time/ etc., etc.. etc?
Well, if you allow yourself to, you can carry on enjoying those exciting moments for the next 20 years. The first wobbly tooth, the first recoder recital, the first might away with Brownies or Cubs, and so it goes on. I'm looking forward to my first born's graduation this summer. I had the thrill of 2 of my dc passing thier driving tests in the last year.
If you look forwards and not back, you have so much to look forwards to.
Enjoy the 'now' in your life, don't be miserable and regret what is not only very natural, but also very, very exciting and fulfilling.

Each stage brings different types of fun and challenges, I guess. Mine are teens and I really enjoy talking to them and getting their take on the world and in many ways find it more interesting than when they were teeny; seeing them develop as a person and the outline of the adults they'll become. They still need you - just in a different way. Also parenting feels more relaxed now. I'd like to go back to the early stage for an hour or so to smell their baby necks again (more fragrant than teen socks) but then would zap back to the present and be relieved to be able to read a book in peace or listen to them talking nineteen to the dozen at the dinner table.

5 has always been a turning point for me. With my oldest three I was emotional on the night before their 5th birthday. Now my youngest is 4, I'll be a mess when it's his turn. I love them growing up but there will always be a part of me that misses their infanthood.

I get this too. They are nearly 5 & 2. In some ways I'm looking forward to the getting older and being able to enjoy things like trips to the theatre with them but I am also so sad the baby stage is well & truly over. Sometimes I wish I'd had a bigger age gap, just to spread it out more. dont want another (don't want 3)

Yep - my eldest and just turned 10 and my youngest is 6. They're both tall which doesn't help.

I am grateful they're developing and thriving but it's just nostalgia isn't it? It's natural.

I used to think that too, I used to wish they could stay babies forever. Then I lost dd2, and I got my wish, she would always be a baby now I'd do anything to see her grow up. To send her off to school, to buy her her first bra, to watch her make a life of her own.

YNBU but Not seeing them growing up is a million times harder than seeing them growing up

I don't feel old enough to be a grandmother but somehow before you know it 28 years fly by and your baby has a baby. Circle of life ☺

Completely understand.
Mine are now teens and I have really enjoyed watching them grow and develop their personalities. I look forward to seeing what the future holds and seeing them become independent.
BUT there is a part of me that misses, almost mourns, the little versions of them that have gone forever.

3littlebadgers - so sorry for your loss.

LittleBoat That made me weep unashamedly .

My 4 DC are all in their early 20's now and occasionally I get a bit wistful about when they were younger. They are lovely now but not quite as cute and cuddly as they were when they were little.

What I didn't realize when they were little was how amazing it is watching them grow up. It wasn't always easy and I still occasionally have my motherly worries but it's every bit as nice now as when they were younger it's just very, very different. Their world's no longer revolve around me, DH and their home but I don't feel sad about it as that's how it should be.

Agree with you 3littlebadgers. Not seeing them grow up is the hardest thing. I lost my son aged 18.

OP, the whole point of having children is so that they can grow up and develop. You don't have kids so that they can stay babies. Why did you have children? It's like buying a kitten and getting pissed off because it turns into cat.

I totally don't feel like this about my Ds who's nearly 5. I love watching him grow and feel pretty much zero nostalgia for the baby and toddler days. Yes the squishy cuddles were lovely, but the bundles of pointy elbows and legs cuddles I get now are just as precious. I generally am quite unsentimental and try to live in the moment as best I can. Today is the only 11th January 2017 we'll ever have so let's use it wisely!
My thoughts go out to those who've lost a child. I'm so sorry for your losses.

All times are special, but the idea you could replay magical moments of childhood is one I love. Which ones they would be? How the child/adult now would see themselves. I love the idea of them all sitting around the table. We have 3 in their 20's and an 8 year old. I'd love them to all be their (8) or whatever age selves, with each other. Good times then and coming

My children are 22, 14 and 6. I'm happy that I still have a fairly little one but my 14 year old is Year 10'and I don't want Year 11 to come. She's so hard working, loves school and has a great group of friends. She's heavily involved in music and dance and is really happy. She's' such also great fun, amazing company. Year 11 will be GCSE's, choosing A Levels, more study and serious decisions. Followed by A Levels, uni etc. I'd just like to stay where we are for a couple of years.

On the other hand, my initial reaction was "why can you not see how lucky you are to see your child grow up" having got friends who are not in that very fortunate position. Growing up is what they are meant to do. The alternative is unbearable.

Very sorry to hear of your losses I can't imagine how horrible that would be

bigbuttons that's a bit harsh isn't it?

Navy I have thought about it. What do you mean?

I just mean how fast time seems to be going. Obviously I do want them to grow up but it all seems to happen so fast