"Console yourself with the fact you are a great mum and while the other mums are feeding their egos you are playing with your children!"
Does it make you feel better to lash out at other parents just because you're feeling bad at what you see in the mirror? Too bad, so sad... you enjoy being plain and grim-looking and wondering why other mothers manage to achieve being well-presented AND good parents.
The trick is...
Yeah, there's no trick.
It's just self care. It's not forgetting yourself just because your kids exist. They get haircuts, they get nice clothes. So do I. It's scheduled in. They get exercise. I get exercise. There's plenty of time in the week for everyone to have a go.
It's also confidence. Frankly I rarely saw 'stylish' mums at soft play/playgroups. I saw everyone in the same hideous shade of blue jean (1980s blue) in a bad cut, grim Matalan shoes, a baggy cheap knit acrylic jumper, make-up free face and limp ponytail. Maybe you just think they look more stylish than you, because your confidence is low?
The next stage in Parenthood fashion is the divide that occurs around 6 months, when some mothers go back to work. You can spot them a mile off. Because they're now forced to, and get into good habits of, groom every day, they often look better. Hair is well-kept. Clothes fit. Make-up's on. It's only little things but for some reason, work provides that kick up the bum to make sure you're presentable. Seeing those put-together mums can provide a bit of encouragement to those still at home, like myself. It just takes a bit of time and discipline. I wouldn't go to work looking a mess, and my SAHM role is just that - work.
So get ready for work!
By about age 2 or 3 most people have usually managed to make their peace with a new style or have become more well-groomed... some don't. There's a couple of mothers at my nursery I want to shake. One wears a grubby, holey fleece that seems to have come free with, or via coupons, from a nappy brand. A nappy fleece. She pairs this with jeans that don't fit and a sad, sad expression. Eventually she'll shake herself out of it... it just ain't right.
It's all confidence. I'm kinda digging the sports-luxe look come January, it just seems right, so I pair my trainers - NICE trainers, cool trainers, not just some scabby old things from Primark - with skinnies - that fit - and an oversize top, because I like the look. I accessorise, take a minute or two for makeup and style my hair. My coat is nice. My scarves are nice. My earrings are nice. I am happy. I am confident. The nappy-fleece lady probably thinks I have some magical skill, but I don't, I just stopped freakin' moping around wondering why I felt so ugly.