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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be befuddled by friends of mine who still go clubbing?

218 replies

user1477282676 · 05/01/2017 11:24

And I mean clubbing...with glitter on their faces, drugs in their pockets...or bras...or wherever they keep them?

These are the same age as me...early 40s...we were part of the "rave scene" and when we were 19 or so spent our lives waiting for the weekend when we could go to one of the many Manchester or Liverpool clubs, get off our heads and dance all night and part of the morning too.

How the feck have they got the energy? Or the desire? They post about their Ibiza plans on FB and put pics of last year's escapades too...isn't it a bit sad?

Or am I a miserable old cow? I suppose if they love it then all good...but the drugs! They've got kids! These are professional people too...teachers and the like.

OP posts:
EC22 · 05/01/2017 20:06

Ageist!
Live and let live.

Are you maybe a teeny weeny bit jealous?!

Grilledaubergines · 05/01/2017 20:07

The clubbing part would be my idea of hell but eachbto their own.

The drugs though are something else. I pity anyone who uses drugs, they're illegal for a reason and your putting your life at risk every time.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

Clankboing · 05/01/2017 21:55

I just remember how I clubbed so much in my 20s, yawn a bit and snuggle up nice and lazily on my sofa.

heron98 · 05/01/2017 22:05

I think a lot of people on this thread have only been to "ritzie" type shit clubs that are worlds away from decent places. If you are into music there are lots of fab venues that are clean, safe and everyone is just there to have a good time. I have never ever been anywhere people were having sex!

GeekLove · 06/01/2017 09:34

Heron

Think I know what you mean. Pretentious places with stupid door policies but which aren't actually that safe. I've never bought the idea of a 'night out clubbing' and 'dress code' in the same sentence.

ageingrunner · 06/01/2017 11:01

Everyone is there to dance ✔️
Everyone is there to try and pull ✖️

YelloDraw · 06/01/2017 11:06

I pity anyone who uses drugs, they're illegal for a reason

Please explain to me what that reason is?

allchattedout · 06/01/2017 11:15

I pity anyone who uses drugs, they're illegal for a reason

Yes, do please explain. I watched a documentary which carried out a scientific analysis of the effects of drugs on the body. Bar heroin and other opiates which are highly addictive and destructive, the top spot in terms of risk of addiction and harm to the body was alcohol. The guy in the programme said that if alcohol were invented now, it would most likely be a Class A drug. The designation of what is legal and illegal is arbitrary and depends on how much cash the government thinks it can rake in from taxation.

ladygrinnings0ul · 06/01/2017 11:16

I'm 30 I hate the word " clubbing " makes me think of Yates or brannigans ! I go to events manly house music ones mostly in clubs in London. And I still go to about 4 day festivals same sort of music a year.This is my me time away from being a mum and to be honest I'd sooner go to a few decent events a year then go " clubbing " every Saturday night.

ageingrunner · 06/01/2017 11:57

I wouldn't say I pity anyone who hasn't tried mdma, but I do think they're missing out tbh. Just my opinion though.

AngelaKardashian · 06/01/2017 12:04

I'm with you there ladygrinning! I'm 25 and go out much less now than I used to, but still enjoy going to events from time to time. When people used to ask "what clubs do you go to?" I was always a bit Confused. I used to go where ever the party was at! Grin

BusterGonad · 06/01/2017 15:22

I'm off out tonight, all dressed up and ready to go...maybe a club is on the cards, maybe not!

MaryMcCarthy · 06/01/2017 15:39

Lots of judgmental comments about drugs in here.

From a health perspective I'd much prefer to do MDMA once every few months than get drunk on anything approaching a regular basis.

I'd be a great deal more coherent, sociable, alert and thoughtful while under the influence, too.

MarvellousMonsters · 06/01/2017 17:39

I'm 48, I'll still happily dance til 3am every now and then. No drugs, tried them 'back in the day' didn't like them, so I go out clean & sober (I don't even drink) I have friends that are 20 years younger than me, and we can still have it large, baby-sitters and finances permitting.

The drugs bit is sheer stupidity, but the clubbing I think is great.

TesticleMeElmo · 06/01/2017 17:54

I'll judge for the drugs (much like everyone else on here has said) because what would happen if they took something that was dodgy and they ended up in hospital or worse?! They have a responsibility to their families and employers to look after themselves as much as possible pulls on judgy pants and gets on high horse I think taking drugs full stop is irresponsible and downright stupid - but then again, I've always thought that. As for the clubbing and staying out all night, fair play. I only wish I had the energy to stay up past half ten Grin

OhhBetty · 06/01/2017 18:00

Just gently pointing out alcohol also has risks. It just happens to be legal. Plus a quick google will tell you there are a lot more alcohol related deaths every year than drug related ones Smile

Deejoda · 06/01/2017 18:03

I would judge if one of the parents went and lumbered the other (usually mum) with the kids without taking into consideration what the OH wanted to do. And definitely judge drug-taking but thats personal! If they ensure their children are looked after and dont shirk their responsibilities, I would turn a blind eye.
P.s I am in my early 30s and havent got the energy for clubbing but my DH is pushing 40 and goes clubbing every weekend. Everyone is different!

Suzcat78 · 06/01/2017 18:03

I go clubbing every now again, but in fairness it tends to an 'old school' type rave with people more my own age. I go to festivals in the summer too. Why, because I like to dance and enjoy drinking and raving with friends. I'm 38 with one child. If they enjoy it, who cares?! Why judge, people do what they want to make themselves happy.

MrsDc7 · 06/01/2017 18:04

laiste same here... not worth having to deal with the hangover Sad How judgemental of you OP. Maybe your friends might think you're sad for coming on mumsnet to slag them off. Maybe you have too much spare time? I hear crocheting is fun - might be more your style?

BusterGonad · 06/01/2017 18:26

I'm a mum and I'm out drinking Leffe, omg, I should be at home bathing the baby!