Fucking ex-wife and PIL

[FedUpBird]

So DH and his EW (ex-wife) split 10 years ago and his family still host her at Christmas and new year.

My SIL has made it very clear she hates me and keeps a photo of DH and EW so I don't go to her house as I feel I'm made un-welcome. They have 2 kids and while I understand they see the kids which is fine but why the hell do they host her!

DH is fucked off with it and has had it out with his sister and has also blocked her on social media as they have photos on there playing happy bloody families.

We've been together about 7 years and married 2, the kids and I get on and they love coming to ours and are made very welcome.

AIBU to feel annoyed that they still treat the EW like they should treat me...gah

Perhaps hosting her is the only way they get yo see their gc

I know it must be difficult but I think the needs of the adults need to come second. Make sure the four kids have access to their family and relatives, and if that means you and dh sitting with forced smiles then that's what needs to happen

To be fair the OP hasn't done anything wrong apart from buy into the fact that it is PIL/EW/SIL that are to blame for her situation rather than her h and his job. It's a common problem on here for Wife 1 to blame Wife 2 and vice versa for a situation caused buy the Man. The thread where a wife blames her MIL for the fact that FIL used to beat her husband as a child is classic example of this minimising of a man's behaviour. Criticizing her husband's choices is not intended as an attack on her but as a loving wife I can understand why she'd interpret it like that.

FedUpBird the parallel universe id completely agree with you on.

People are giving you the other side of the coin to look at. Obviously you don't have to, but it may help

1horatio Some posters disagreed and made reasoned suggestions. Other posters turned into swivel eyed nutters. Some jumped in to kick someone who was asking for help. Others made points the OP disagreed with and these were hard but helpful other posters were just mean.

Names were called, insults hurled. Some posters were rational and others really, really weren't.

I know what you did and other people know what they did.

This is by far the most unpleasant thread I have ever read on MN. Some posters who whilst they may legitimately disagree with the OP, have been unbelievably hostile and aggressive and deliberately insulting towards the OP, not to mention making all kinds of assumptions when no such information was presented.

I agree Rainbunny and when the OP posts perfectly normal things about military life and it's limitations everyone piles in with - but you could just do X, Y or Z (insert something completely incompatible with military family life here). Bloody awful thread and treatment of the OP.